AITAH for finding somewhere else to be on Christmas after seeing that my sister’s new bf has hate symbols on his social media?
A Reddit user shared their decision to skip Christmas dinner after discovering their sister’s new boyfriend prominently displays hate symbols on his social media. While the family argues the symbols might not mean what the user believes, the user stands firm on their boundaries. Read the full story below to see how the situation unfolded.
‘ AITAH for finding somewhere else to be on Christmas after seeing that my sister’s new bf has hate symbols on his social media?’
I love my family, but I draw a hard line at breaking bread with s**ual predators, people who hurt children, or people who publicly affiliate themselves with hate groups. When my sister made her relationship Facebook official I saw her new man’s profile for the first time.
The confederate flag punisher skull, to me, is not ambiguous in the least. That’s some proud boy nonsense and I am totally unwilling to break bread with a person who displays it.
I know he is invited to Christmas dinner and I’m finding somewhere else to be. Of course my family is deeply upset by this and trying to say all sorts of things about how “it doesn’t mean that to everybody” or “maybe he doesn’t know”, but this sounds ridiculous to me.
AITAH for (in their view) being “intolerant” and “punishing” my family by removing myself from a situation where I would be forced to interact with this man?
Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:
Ireland1169 − NTA. They (your family) made their choice you made yours.. Enjoy your hassle free Christmas.
Far_Information_9613 − NTA. Your sister is probably going to regret this.
NefariousnessFresh24 − What do you have when you have six people welcoming a person they know to be a Nazi? Seven Nazis or synpathizers. You can acknowledge his intolerance, you do not have to tolerate it .
BarRegular2684 − Once upon a time my family went to a family reunion being held by a sister of my grandmother’s. I was five, so details are a bit fuzzy. I remember there was a live band. I remember it was in Oswego county. And I remember walking in with my grandmother and seeing that flag.
My grandmother squeezed my hand, all of us turned around, and we walked right out of the house. We never spoke to anyone from that branch of the family tree again. Because that’s how you handle racists.
That side of my family wasn’t even in this country during the war. But we know which side was right and it’s not the side that thought skin color conveyed ownership.. Sorry about your sister.
TootyBeauty − NTA. Christmas is supposed to be a happy time. Bigots don’t make you happy. That’s fair. I wouldn’t go either.
Spocksangel − Enjoy your r**ist free Christmas because if I knew any better this guy sounds like the definition of r**ist and sounds like this guy is one of those types that yea no thank you even I wouldn’t spend time with the guy so not the Ah but your parents and sister maybe
BeetFarmHijinks − NTA. When there is one Nazi at the table, and nine people join him, there are 10 Nazis at the table. Be proud that you have the integrity and morality not to be one of those Nazis at the table.
Expensivetolook − NTA you don’t have to spend Christmas with anyone you don’t want to.
SneakyTrevor − NTA. You’re not the one being intolerant, you’re just refusing to tolerate intolerance. He’s the one with the hateful views. Why is your family so prepared to brush them aside?
ComradeTortoise − NTA. How could he not know? Has he been living under a rock for the past decade? Did he just miss 2017-2021 in a comatose state, or flunk every US history class he’s ever taken? This is up there with having PatriotEagle1488 as a username. There’s no excuse.
Do you think the user’s decision to avoid Christmas dinner was a principled stand against hate or an overreaction based on assumptions? How would you approach this kind of moral conflict within your family? Share your thoughts below!