AITAH For crying because my husband bought me a dress?
A woman recently opened up on Reddit about a painful incident involving her husband after he returned from a business trip. Despite knowing she had gained weight and no longer fit into smaller sizes, he brought her a dress in a size small, explaining that it was meant as “motivation.”
The gesture left her feeling hurt and questioning whether she was wrong for being upset—follow the story below to learn more.
‘AITAH For crying because my husband bought me a dress?’
My husband (32M) and I (25F) started dating right after I had turned 22 after knowing each other for a year. Back then I was maybe 110lbs, since then, probably due to birth control and just getting older (as I now eat healthier and work out more regularly than I ever did back then),I have gained about 27lbs (I am 5’7”).
There’s this dress I’ve been wanting but was sold out in our area and online. He had to go on a business trip to another state and his hotel was attached to a mall so I asked him to please get me the dress if he happened to see it. He came back today and gave me the dress. It was a size small. My heart immediately dropped.
Over the last few months he’s been watching me have to get rid of practically everything I own in a size small as I finally accepted that my weight is not coming back down. I asked him why he got it in a small when he knows I don’t fit in those anymore. His response? “It’s for motivation”.
I refused to try the dress on and started crying when he insisted. He told me “don’t be like that” “don’t do this to me” and that he was already stressed about getting me the dress as he was busy with work during his trip and he went out of his way to get it for me.
He angrily got in the shower and I came downstairs to the kitchen to calm down.
Am I o*erreacting? Am I being ungrateful? I feel like garbage right now so I am here for an objective point of view.
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
Aromatic_Location says:
Not only is OP not fat, she is at her ideal weight now. 110 is considered under weight for 5’7. She could go up to 155 and still be in the normal BMI range.
Parking_Stress3431 says:
I’m 5’7 and 153 after just having my third child but before child number 3 I had been 125 since 6th grade…. she’s tiny compared to me and he suggested motivation to lose more… f*ck him he’s a whole ass troll. Get rid of him if he can’t understand how fucked his view of his wife is.. fucking shallow b*stard.
Mutive says:
I was thinking the same. 110 lbs is a *really* low weight for her height.
Bodies are all different, etc. etc. But there’s something more than a little sick about trying to “”motivate”” your wife to go from a normal (and probably healthy) weight to one that could be quite unhealthy.
Not that husband’s actions are okay either way. But him wanting her to go from normal weight to underweight makes them particularly g*otesque.
Chuckitybye says:
110 lbs is a really low weight for me at 5’4″ because of my build. I got down to 115 (not on purpose, i had oral surgery and couldn’t eat properly) and had people asking if I was okay! My peak physical condition was about 135 of solid muscle and 145 is still a decent weight for me.
OP is NTA btw, but I can’t say the same for her husband
stonerbaby112 says:
I’ll roll up with ya!
Op, you may not realize it, but that’s a form of control, mental manipulation and mental and emotional abuse. Big ol’ red flag in your face. And I agree with everyone else here; you NEEDED that weight! Go find yourself an outfit that makes you feel amazing and hit the town with your girlfriends. Screw him, he should wallow in his own “misery”.
This situation shows how intentions can sometimes get lost in translation, leaving loved ones hurt despite good motives. Was this a case of encouragement gone wrong, or something deeper? What do you think? Share your thoughts in the comments!