AITAH for confronting my wife about her cheating on me after she got in a car accident ?

A man (32M) confronts his wife (31F) about suspicious texts and calls from her ex after she was involved in a car accident. The wife had told him she was working but later claimed she had simply run into her ex on her break.

The husband, concerned about the situation, brings it up after she returns home shaken from the accident. His wife accuses him of being an asshole for questioning her actions after such a stressful event. Now, the man is uncertain if he was wrong to confront her under these circumstances.

‘ AITAH for confronting my wife about her cheating on me after she got in a car accident ?’

Me (32M) and my wife (31F) have been together for about 6 years and married for two. We have recently been have some heated arguments here and there, I already posted about one of them and I dont want to beat that dead horse.

Last night me and my wife had a long conversation about our last argument and we both agreed we need to change some ways of both of our thinking and some of our actions when angry.

This morning was great, she let me know that shes covering one of her friends shifts so she will be gone from 3PM till they closed at 10PM. She left to “go to work” at 2:30 and I ran some errands and saw my mom for s couple hours.

I got home about 6 hours later and after I was home for a while I saw that her Ipad was blowing up with texts. I’m not usually one to want to look through texts but I noticed that it was 10:15 and she hadnt texted me that she was on the way back yet (her work always closes right on the dot).

I saw that these texts and calls she was getting were from her ex from before we were together telling her he had so much fun, to be safe on the way home and to call him so they could talk on the way home. The following texts were asking if she was okay and if she needed him to come help with anything.

She then called me and told me she was just leaving work and she got rear ended but that the damage wasnt too bad she was just shaken up. I was honestly more worried about her and wasn’t focusing on the ex at this point.

She told me she was about to leave to come home and that she doesn’t need me to come get her. She got home pretty shaken up and she cried a bit and I consoled her, and after a couple hours she calmed down and I started to think about what I saw.

I brought it up and asked her if she was actually covering work for her friend or if she was with him and she immediately started crying and saying I was an a**hole for accusing her of that after she got in an accident and that the person texting and calling wasn’t her ex,

it was a guy with the same name that she has been friends with for years who happened to run into her on her break. I have never heard of this guy. She’s currently crying and I told her I was going to use the bathroom (hide and ask wtf I should do). Am I the a**hole for bring it up after the car accident?

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

ncjr591 −  She’s cheating on you, you know it. She’s just g**lighting you bce she’s fucked.

AnonThrowAway072023 −  Nah you are not an a**hole . Just an i**ot. You know what you read.  You know what it means.

Flashy-Interview-726 −  nah, you’re not. cheating’s a big deal, and you have every right to bring it up. the timing’s rough, but that’s on her actions, not you.

Accomplished_Pea6334 −  Hate to say this, but she is playing the narcissistic victim role. Anything you do, she will make herself into a victim.. She’s clearly lying.. NTA btw. Let us know what happens!

FasterThanNewts −  Call a lawyer in the morning. Follow their advice on how to get her out of your life with minimal cost to you. You know she’s cheating and lying. Relationship is over. NTA

AlwaysHelpful22 −  Not only is she a filthy c**ater who has zero respect for you, she’s also able to look you in the eye, lie to you and then gaslight YOU about her cheating. She’s a n**ty whoring AH. If you don’t have the self-respect to d**p her after this, don’t bother posting on Reddit again – you’re hopeless.

Lopsided_Tomatillo27 −  So she’s not f**king her ex, she’s f**king someone with the same name as her ex? That’s reassuring.

Jokester_316 −  She’s lying to you. I would verify that she was at work. Sounds like she lied to you and was hooking up with this guy. Keep digging. The truth will eventually come out. You saw the messages. Hell, reach out to him. He will happily let you know what she’s doing behind your back.

Ifiwerenyourshoes −  Ask your wife to see all the texts. Say I would like to see your replies. When she says no that is an i**asion of my privacy you simply respond with ok. Then we can divorce.

MyDirtyAlt79 −  You saw the texts, and you saw she contacted this person before you when she got off work. You know this because he asked about the accident so he was in contact with her at the time. Also, were the texts after a break or at the end of the night?

It’d be odd for him to wait until her “shift” was over to text her if they hung during her “break.” I’m also not sure how much fun they could have had over a short time and how it would have been that great.

It all sounds suspect. You have her iPad, her texts, possibly her location history, and the accident report. The question has already been asked, so now it’s time to find out the answer.. NTA.

Do you think the husband was justified in confronting his wife about the suspicious texts after her accident, or should he have waited until things calmed down? How would you handle the situation if you were in his position? Share your thoughts and join the conversation below!