AITAH for being frustrated and disgusted in what my sister and BIL did so I did something for my niece?

A Redditor shared their frustration over how their sister and brother-in-law handled their niece Legacy’s 13th birthday. After an age-inappropriate party left Legacy feeling left out and unhappy, this Redditor took matters into their own hands to give Legacy the celebration she deserved. Read the full story below to find out what happened!

‘ AITAH for being frustrated and disgusted in what my sister and BIL did so I did something for my niece?’

I’m an auntie and I never want kids. Me and my husband went over to my big sister’s house about two weeks ago and she has four kids; my homegirl Legacy(13f) and then my nephews Leon(4) Leo(4) and Landon(3w). Legacy just turned 13 two weeks ago!!

Went it was time for the party absolutely NONE of her friends came. It was only her cousins, ages 8-4 years old and I was pissed because I mean yes cousins can come but what about her friends?!?!

Her cousins are literally still under the age of 10 and most of them are boys and they don’t even spend time with her anymore because she’s “older” to them. She has maybe 3 best friends she wanted to invite, she told me.

Legacy didn’t have ANY fun whatsoever. Her mom had a ball pit for little kids, a small water slide, one of those inflatable water slides for small kids… it was hell I tell you, HELL.

In the goodie bags my sister put in a whole bunch of kid stuff in there… and I promise to god I almost peed on myself from being disturbed by the fact that she had a damn Minnie and Mickey Mouse mini drawing pad in there and NOT ONLY DID SHE HAVE BABY STUFF IN THERE, LEGACY DIDN’T EVEN GET A GOD DAMN BAG!!

I mean yeah it got baby stuff in there but at least let her have a fuckin bag. Legacy couldn’t even do anything there cause her mom had her taking care of her brother.

She put 1 candle into the back which was confusing to me because she’s 13 not 1. But then she blew the candle out and then my sister put another one on and she told the kids to line up and they all blew out the candles and I was fuckin damned outta this world… like if she don’t get her fuckin s**t together I swear…

But then I left because I so pissed. So I did what I did best… and took matters into my own hands. Me and my husband were so mad at my sister that we decided that we were gonna be the RESPONSIBLE AND INTELLIGENT ADULTS and give Legacy what she really wanted.

We moved the furniture in a room and we added pillows, blankets, squishmellows, Legacy’s favorite snacks, I had a nail place set up, and I bought us some girly pajamas and me, her, and her friend(not the boys) had a great time. Then the next day my husband took her and her friends(including the boys) to a skating place and we too then to go eat. It was the best.

My sister and BIL was mad that we didn’t do a with the smaller kids and just did the bigger kids. I told her that what she did two weeks ago was s**tty and very immature of her and she said that I was a terrible auntie.

These are the responses from Reddit users:

misscaulfieldsays −  NTA – if this is so reoccurring, it is some unhinged parenting that will forever make Legacy feel disregarded time and time again and teach her siblings that their wants are more important than her needs.

The parents should be more than onboard with one special day for one of their children at a time. You did a sweet thing and I’m sure she’ll cherish that memory and your relationship so much more.

FordWarrier −  In just a few short years your sister is going to complain to you that Legacy doesn’t call her, doesn’t visit ever and she doesn’t understand why.. Tell her the truth. I’m glad your niece has you and your husband.. NTA

Ok_Passage_6242 −  NTA. Just make sure your niece comes to you next year around her birthday and you ask her what kind of party she wants to have. When you get lost in a family like that and she will, if this is already happening at 13, she’s got five more years of it. It’s really important to have people like you and her life To make it better.

Manky-Cucumber −  Maybe it’s my OCD, but am I the only one thinking that cake had to be gross after all those kids slobbering over it? The whole thing was a s**t show geared towards the little kids. How awful 😖 Good thing you stepped up and gave her a fun time. She’ll never forget it.

Therowan26 −  NTA I would’ve done the same thing, f**k that s**t!

Substantial-Sir-9947 −  Best Aunt ever! Your sister is a terrible mother to Legacy. NTA.

[Reddit User] −  NTA…. BEST AUNT EVER AWARD 🏆 goes to you. Your niece will never forget what you did for her. I hate parents like your sister. When my kids were little. We taught them this isn’t your day. You’re free to enjoy yourself. But when it’s cake time you get a slice. You’re not blowing out candles. We’re not buying you a gift. They knew better to even try it.

My son God Mom tried it. Bringing him a toy on our daughter’s birthday. That was an automatic nope. Back in the car it goes. Give it to him next week. Today is for her and her only.

TheLastMongo −  You rock. Be the good aunt and keep making sure she’s not forgotten or pushed aside for the younger kids. Her parents will hate you because you don’t play into their favoritism, but f**k em. At least she knows she has someone watching out for her, I get the bad feeling she’s going to need that the next few years. 

FleeshaLoo −  NTA. You are a goddess to your niece and I bet she is wildly appreciative.
Your sister tho… she’s going to be wondering some day why Legacy went NC. I was the forgotten kid and the house maid. It scarred me.

Competitive-Peanut-3 −  NTA. Thank you for prioritizing your niece’s wants for her birthday and continue to call out your sister’s biases.