AITA we’re not inviting my soon to be mother-in-law wedding dress shopping?

A Reddit user shared a story about planning her wedding and deciding not to invite her soon-to-be mother-in-law to go wedding dress shopping. After the mother-in-law repeatedly made negative comments about the couple’s decision to marry, the Redditor wanted to avoid any more tension during the dress fitting.Now, the mother-in-law is upset about being left out, leading to more family drama.

Read the full story below to dive into the details and share your thoughts!

‘ AITA we’re not inviting my soon to be mother-in-law wedding dress shopping?’

I’m 20 and my fiancé, 21 have agreed it is time for us to get married next July. We have been dating for around 1 1/2 years so when we get married it will be over 2 years. We were very excited and could not wait to tell are family’s.

Whenever we were around his family we would make comments about what we would want at are wedding. His mom would make comments back about how it’s to soon and we need to wait. To me it got old and I got very annoyed at the comments bc I believe it is up to us deciding whether we get married or not. We told my family and my grandpa was very excited and my aunt was too.

When his family got wind of the message his dad and grandparents were ecstatic at hearing the news about us getting married except his mom. His mom went on a rant about how it’s too soon and we need to wait and we’re too amateur as she made that comment his grandma from his father side made a comment asking for what age did you get married? Didn’t you get married at 21 she made the comment yes but we knew each other.

After her making all the comments that she did, I’ve decided that I’m not including her in any of the wedding planning. I’m not having them pay for anything as if I’m paying for the whole wedding with my fiancé when it comes to wedding dress shopping I decided not to have her because I did not want her saying any harsh or rude comments during time at the shop.

I easily get uncomfortable with rude comments and people judging how things look on me so I did not want any judgment. I just wanted to be good vibes after she heard that I tried on dresses. She went to my fiancé and complained that she didn’t get to be there for the dress fitting. AITA??

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

Lizzydeathstar −  You’re NTA but you *everyone* is immature (not Amateur..) at 20 and 21. Have a long engagement. Your relationship is still in the newish, honeymoon phase. Do you live together/pay bills together? Are you both where you want to be financially?

When you get married/who you include is 100% up to you but I would truly consider heeding her words. Who I was as a person at 20 vs even 25 was a HUGE difference. Good luck either way!

Repulsive-Plane9429 −  Dude you can’t even legally drink int he USA, I am with MIL. Have a long engagement not get marrried at 20 and 21. Are you even done with college yet??? Also people got married so early before because they had too…

Murderkitten65 −  Please wait until you can actually use language properly. It’s our not are. Immature not amateur. You can have whoever you like to go dress shopping, but she is right you are young and immature.

Logical_Read9153 −  You are to young to be getting married. Im not trying to be mean here, but it will end in divorce that is just common sense.

Traditional-Load8228 −  You don’t have to invite anyone you don’t want to to help with shopping. But. You sound like an immature b**t quite frankly. She’s right. You guys are too young and you haven’t known each other long enough to have even had time brains fully develop. Your reasoning is basically retaliate and punish her for having an opinion.

That’s childish. And proving her point. And when you’re an adult and look back at young people your age you’re going to agree with her. You have so much life to live and so much growing to do. Your twenties can be soooooo much fun. Don’t rush to a wedding. He’ll be there in five years if you’re meant to be

Ok_Albatross8909 −  If you really love eachother, there is no harm in waiting until you are a bit older. Let the relationship become more serious as you age into it. I know so many people (myself included) who got married young because they “met their person” (everyone thinks this) and didn’t see a reason to wait.

As we graduated college, got our first careers, began dealing with aging parents, bills, savings for a house, pregnancy scares, etc we grew up and our personalities and values changed a lot. The things that I liked about him at 20 were totally irrelevant by the time I was 23.

Conversely, many of my friends who took their time are still in a relationship with their boyfriends they met at 18. TLDR: if you feel the need to rush, and commitment to growing together isn’t enough, it’s probably a bad relationship.

FairyCompetent −  You’re not mature enough to be married. Better luck with your second marriage in nine years.

DeaconBlue22 −  You come off as extremely immature teenager plotting revenge because someone doesn’t agree with you. Your FMIL is right. You both should grow up a little and experience life before you make a life altering decision like this.

aloneintheupwoods −  Very gently YTA. A thousand years ago when dinosaurs roamed the earth I met my (now husband) when I was 16 and he was 21. Guess how old I was when I got married? 25, yes, 25. In those 9 years I finished high school, went to college, we got engaged, lived together, etc. I grew and changed as a person immensely. Our son just got married at the age of 28 after knowing his (now wife) since high school. It’s ok to wait. Really!

Dlraetz1 −  I cringed when I saw that you were 20 and he was 21. I honestly hope you are having the important conversations: How will you make money? Where will you live? What if one of you gets a job out of town? What about school? What about kids? How many do you want?

How will you feed and provide for them. A wedding is easy. It’s a marriage that’s hard. Make sure you know where the two of you are going before you buy that (expensive) pretty white dress.