AITA for yelling at a couple because of their kids at the airport?

A 16-year-old recounts an incident at customs where he firmly told a couple to control their unruly kids after they repeatedly bumped into him and his sick mother. His mom, who was exhausted and battling severe health issues after a long flight, was unable to confront them herself.

The couple seemed startled but complied. However, when the teenager shared the story later, his coworkers accused him of overreacting and being a “Karen.” read the original story below…

‘ AITA for yelling at a couple because of their kids at the airport?’

Last year I 16M went backpacking across Europe with my mom 44 for three weeks. We hit a few countries and it was a lot of fun but towards the end of our trip we got sick. I barely had a rash but my mom was hit bad with headaches fever nausea and patches of puffy red rashes/inflammation on her neck.

We were a day from our return flight and our medical options in Rome weren’t great so we decided she’d see a doctor first thing when we got back. She was extremely exhausted after such a long trip and worsening so by the time we got off our sixteen hour flight back to Cali she was practically a zombie.

We were waiting in the line at customs for American citizens and right behind us was a couple with two kids. It was a long line so we were stuck with them for at least twenty minutes and their kids were going wild. The two little boys looked to be around four and seven.

They were screaming and running in and out of the line bumping into people and stepping over feet. The parents were unbothered and speaking casually with each other in Italian. This was really upsetting my mom as they ran into us the most and the screaming only exacerbated her headache.

Now I’m not very confrontational unlike my mother I would rather bite my tongue but seeing as she couldn’t say much it really bothered me. I kept telling myself I’d say something after one more time and one more time and eventually I boiled over,

I whipped around looked them dead in the eyes and said “you speak English right?!” “Keep your kids in line!” I didn’t yell but I was loud and firm. The mom just looked shocked, picked up her kids and that was the end of it. My mom tried to say stop right beforehand but didn’t say much after.

It wasn’t until I told this story to my coworkers back at work that my boss said I sounded like a Karen and overreacted. I think I held it together remarkably well but what do you think?

For a little more context we later found out my mom had a staph infection and almost went septic, plus she has multiple preexisting conditions like cluster headaches, hyperthyroidism (her thyroid was removed) and sleep apnea. Added (I forgot) brain lesions from micro strokes and heart problems.

Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:

Aggressive_Cattle320 −  ESH You went on that flight in spite of being very ill. Your symptoms, including rashes, were indicative of some type of virus or infection, and you should have seen a doctor BEFORE getting on that flight.

When traveling in foreign countries, you could have picked up anything along the way. If it was a communicable disease, you could have sickened the entire plane full. Very irresponsible on your parts.

Parents are supposed to pay attention to what their kids are doing and keep them from disturbing other people around. I’m glad I wasn’t there because I would have had issues with all of your behaviors.

Tanuki0 −  YTA your medical options weren’t great in the capital city of Italy ? Come on now

wanderer0075 −  So, you all admittedly just got off of a sixteen hour flight during which, presumably, these children were probably forced to be on their best behavior and not disturb other passengers. For sixteen hours. Children.

They were letting off their own steam, just being kids. Yes, customs lines are tedious and boring and the chaos that the kids bring to the mix probably isn’t ideal, especially considering that y’all were both literally sick and tired, but they were just being kids.

Add to that mix the fact that your mom had a contagious infection and did not seek immediate medical care (which is mostly free or low cost in Italy) prior to traveling home.

If you were unsure where to seek medical care you could have contacted the US Consulate in Rome (a conveniently large city that is very familiar with tourists and foreigners), but really any publicly available hospital would have helped your mom.

I can see things from your perspective but as a former world traveler, I say you took your frustrations out on a tired parent who was probably just letting their kids be kids for a bit. Frustrations that were understandable but ultimately unwarranted as you made your own situation untenable for no reason. YTA

deadmencantcatcall3 −  YTA you sound entitled and privileged. And throwing in your mom’s other non life threatening conditions there at the end doesn’t help your case for why in the hell you both got on a plane when you were sick. It’s disgusting and ableist.

They know how to treat staph in Europe. She probably wouldn’t have been “almost septic” if she’d gone to a doc right away and started antibiotics. Your mom looked shocked and got quiet because she doesn’t think you handled the situation with the kids well. Your boss also thinks you overreacted. Read the room.

RosieDays456 −  First neither you or your mother should have been on that plane – Extremely irresponsible of you both, especially your mother, she should have known better. She risked you both spreading something to those sitting near you,

gate and flight attendants or entire plane because you didn’t know what was wrong with either of you. total assholes for doing that. You should have gotten medical care before getting on a plane for a 16 hr flight.

Never travel without travel health insurance and travel insurance for your transportation and when traveling you should always allow 3-4 days extra in case you miss a flight, or like you two – were very ill and should have gotten treatment and stayed put for a few days.

“you speak English right?!” “Keep your kids in line!” I didn’t yell but I was loud and firm. YTA – you think you were being a cool guy by doing this – you just looked like an ass, kindness goes a long way, you could have simply turned around and asked the parents to please keep their children with them as they were running into people.

After a 16 hr flight everyone is cranky as hell and your being LOUD and FIRM was totally unnecessary without first trying kindness – you acted like a spoiled a**hole TRY KINDESS NEXT TIME.

forwardnote48 −  Medical options in Rome were not great? My guy it is the capital city lol. Also, what’s with the “You speak English, right?” Did the three weeks of backpacking Europe but you just absolutely *had* to fulfill the stereotype of the entitled American didn’t you. I hope the both of you at least wore a mask on the flight YTA massively

Ogolble −  If you and your mother weren’t sick, would it have bothered you as much? I have a feeling you both were annoyed more because you weren’t at full capacity. But what the f were you both thinking getting in a flight in that condition? You could literally kill people spreading germs like that

canningjars −  I am surprised they let you on the plane. You have zero respect for seniors, immunocompromised individuals and the public in genersl. I am surprised that the mother did not turn you into the ticket agent for being rude and ill.

You had no business doing either thing. You could’ve spoken quietly to mom You have no idea what she’s been through and if the kids run around outside the plane more than likely they’ll sleep on the plane so I truly think YTA. 

Was the firm approach justified under the circumstances, or was it an overreaction to an unavoidable travel situation? Have you ever been in a similar situation? Share your thoughts below!