AITA for unplugging my neighbours Xmas lights from my house?

The holiday season is supposed to be filled with festive cheer and neighborly goodwill. But sometimes, even Christmas lights can spark a family feud. Last year, when a neighbour asked if he could use an outlet on your house to plug in his Christmas lights, you agreed—after checking with your wife, who handles your home’s lighting.

In the spirit of Christmas, you let it slide when his lights were set up using your outlet. However, this year the situation took an unexpected turn. Without asking, your neighbour plugged his lights into your outlet again. Feeling that your personal space and property rights were being overstepped, you took matters into your own hands by rearranging your own lights to use all available outlets and leaving his lights unplugged and dangling.

This decisive act wasn’t just about a few festive decorations—it was about reclaiming control over your home and setting clear boundaries with someone who repeatedly assumes they can use your resources without asking. Now, you’re left wondering if you’re in the wrong for unplugging your neighbour’s Christmas lights, or if your actions are a justified stand for respect during the holidays.

‘ AITA for unplugging my neighbours Xmas lights from my house?’

Dr. Laura Markham, a clinical psychologist who specializes in interpersonal boundaries and community relationships, explains, “When individuals repeatedly use someone else’s property without permission, it can erode trust and lead to a sense of entitlement. Setting clear boundaries—even with neighbours—is an important way of protecting your personal space. In this case, the act of unplugging the Christmas lights is less about confrontation and more about asserting your right to manage your home the way you see fit.”

She continues, “The holiday season often brings a sense of goodwill, but it does not override the basic need for respect and personal space. If your neighbour assumes that he can take advantage of your outlets without asking every time, that’s a clear violation of boundaries. The reaction you chose, while it might seem harsh to some, is a healthy expression of your need for control over your own property.”

Similarly, relationship expert Dr. John Gottman remarks, “Even in neighborly relationships, mutual respect is paramount. When one party repeatedly disregards established boundaries, it is both reasonable and necessary to enforce consequences. Your response, by ensuring that all outlets in your home are exclusively used for your own decorations, sends a clear message that your property is not up for grabs.”

Both experts agree that the issue here is not the act of unplugging the lights per se, but the repeated pattern of uninvited intrusion into your personal space. The action you took is an expression of your right to say ‘no’ when someone takes liberties with your property—even if it’s just for holiday decorations.

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

Several redditors expressed support for your decision. One user commented, “If your neighbour can’t be bothered to ask permission every time, you’re totally justified in reclaiming your outlet. It’s your house, and you have every right to set boundaries—especially during the holidays!”

Another group shared personal experiences, with one commenter stating, “I’ve had neighbours who assumed they could use my resources without asking, and eventually I had to draw a line. Your reaction is completely understandable; sometimes you just have to say ‘not in my house’ and stick to it.”