AITA for uninviting my friends to thanksgiving ?

A person hosted two Thanksgiving events: one for family and another for friends. Despite clear boundaries set about no smoking indoors, a friend smoked weed in the host’s bedroom and vaped in the kitchen. When asked to smoke outside during Friendsgiving,

the friend argued it was unfair as smoking was part of her “medication.” After repeated pushback, the host uninvited her from the event, feeling their boundaries were being disregarded. Now, they question if they overreacted. read the original story below…

‘ AITA for uninviting my friends to thanksgiving ?’

I had a family thanksgiving dinner and a Friendsgiving. The family one was made last minute and I had the friends one planned for a while. My parents had the family one at my house because there’s more room to move around,

so I was the host and I had told everyone to please not smoke in the house and to go outside if they wanted to smoke. I have a weird family and I look at her as a sister and a friend so she was invited to both.

Her and her boyfriend went to my master bedroom and was smoking in there and than spraying my perfume to cover up the smell of weed and the vaping. She later than was vaping in front of my in the kitchen I than asked her to please stop and to go outside if she wanted to smoke.

I had texted her to please don’t smoke in the house and not to reek of the weed to the point it made me sick like it did for the thanksgiving dinner and if she wanted to smoke outside and spray some perfume or cologne before coming back in would be okay ,

and she said that I was pretty much telling her not to use her medication while being at my house and that I didn’t understand her feelings and I had told her I understand everyone has different ways of using and taking medication and that I just ask to smoke outside she than said that the smell isn’t going to make my house dirty and I was overreacting.

I said that I feel like you’re not understanding where I’m coming from or understanding my feelings and it’s my house. She still kept arguing with me on this so I asked her to please don’t come to the Friendsgiving so am I the a**hole?

See what others had to share with OP:

baddieeeaddison −  NTA, it’s your house, your rules. you told her politely, and if she couldn’t respect that, it’s on her. she could’ve smoked outside, but she ignored you, honestly, sounds like she was testing your boundaries

ThoughtIndividual114 −  NTA and I think you already know that.

1houndgal −  NTA . She was total ass. It is incredibly rude to smoke in a home when told not there by the owner. Especially weed where some folks can get in trouble if they get a contact high or mj is detected in a test. Even if it was a cigarette, it is rude to smoke when asked not to. Same for vaping.

It is rude to light up in public in front of other non-smokers and also without asking if it is ok. Smoke of all types causes health issues for many people. And vaping is not benign either.

I see people vaping/smoking at places like crowded public parks and zoos with children nearby. Irks me beca8se no one should have to be at risk for an asthma attack just so someone needs a hit’/fix.

SweetPotato781 −  NTA – Your friend seems to think that your house rules don’t apply to her and that’s a problem. Even if she were your actual sister, she still needs to respect your house rules when she is a guest in your home.

favKatie −  NTA. Your house, your rules. If she wants to hotbox a bedroom, she can host her own Weedsgiving. Respecting boundaries isn’t optional, even if her “medication” is.

bmcmakin −  NTA, totally disrespectful behavior on their part.

PleaseCoffeeMe −  NTA. It’s a simple ask. Real friends would respect you and your home.

That_UsrNm_Is_Taken −  NTA. Smoking anything in someone’s home when asked not is extremely disrespectful… and they wasted your perfume! Also, your ask for no smoking is completely reasonable. A lot of people don’t like that. I have smoked and would never do it in my home – not cigarettes,

not weed, not vapes, because all smoke penetrates fabric fibers and lingers. But here’s the thing, even if what you requested of the guests in YOUR HOME was *slightly* unreasonable, people should still respect it, because they are GUESTS in YOUR HOME

dart1126 −  NTA. She blatantly and repeatedly broke and then argued with you about your one reasonable ‘no smoking in my house’ rule. You’re safe to assume she’d just do it again, so, why should she expect to be welcomed back?

Long_Start_3142 −  As a medical cannabis user I can assure you the medicine works the same if you take it out doors. NTA don’t let people walk over you in your own home.

Was uninviting the friend an overreaction, or a necessary step to uphold house rules and personal comfort? What would you have done in this situation? Share your thoughts below!