AITA for uninviting my cousin, brother, uncle and dad to my wedding over a prank?

A Reddit user uninvited her father, uncle, brother, and cousin from her wedding after their relentless “pranks” on her fiancé, including hiding his inhaler during a trip, which put his health at risk. Now, her family accuses her of overreacting and jeopardizing relationships over what they claim was “just a joke.” She wonders if her decision was too harsh.

‘ AITA for uninviting my cousin, brother, uncle and dad to my wedding over a prank?’

I f22 grew up in a family where men prank and tease each others. eversince my fiance (Tim 23) and I got engaged, my cousin, brother, dad and uncle joked about running some ‘tests’ to see what “type” of man Tim is. They’ve done stuff like forcing him to play chess 4 times in a raw, secretly slashed his tires to see if he’d fix it himself like a man or get help like those “lazy” guys, They’d asked him questions like what joke he’d like to tell his future MIL, his opinions on a**rtion, jesus, gender equality etc.

They also tested his fishing and hunting skills, o**rwhelmed him with hypothetical scenarios to test his decision making abilities/mental strength. They kept calling him slow and soft but he has medical condition (asthma) but they think he’s making ‘excuses’. I demanded they stop, but dad said this is just typical stuff men challenge each others with and said that I was ruining the fun.

Last week, They took Tim on a 3 day trip and hid his inhaler, he left them and returned in 7hrs and told me, I was seething after he said they admitted to hiding it as a “challenge”, I exploded on them when they returned. Cousin asked if “little timmy ran to me to tattle”. I yelled that all 4 of them are uninvited to my wedding.

My brother freaked out saying it was a prank and they were going to give it back, Dad said they’ll apologize if I insist but Tim will have lost the little respect they’d gained for him and in their eyes will always be “the soft college kid” who’s not up for the challenge. I called him and the others awful then I left.

My cousin is begging that we talk, my uncle has been quiet, but dad is so mad and now he’s getting mom involved to get me to reconsider this decision. But I keep refusing to re invite them. Mom is saying I’m exaggerating and should let bygones be bygones and not let this ruin my relationship with my family. AITA? For making it my hill to die on or am I exaggerating?

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

missteacher2 −  NTA. This doesn’t sound like pranking but more like bullying. Who slashes tyres as a prank? Or messes with someone’s health as a prank? Just they just seem like big bullies to me. In my family we tease each other and play jokes and trust me this is not what we do! Pranking is meant to be HARMLESS fun. None of these are harmless.

Edited to say I am a woman who has asthma as well. The feeling you get when you need your inhaler is awful. It’s not a feeling I would wish on anyone! And to also add that they’re belittling his mental health too. Aren’t we trying to advocate for mens mental health? Men are also entitled to show emotions and have a caring side. They don’t need to be all “macho” and emotionally stunted like your dad and family seem to be. Men’s mental health is important! And stick up for your fiancé.

CrystalQueen3000 −  NTA. They shouldn’t come. Their ‘pranks’ went from wildly inappropriate to outright dangerous. They hid an inhaler from someone with asthma. Not only would I keep them disinvited, I’d go no contact completely.

[Reddit User] −  NTA- for un-inviting your dad, cousin, brother, and uncle from your wedding. YTA- for making your husband put up with their antics for so long.. Edit: typo.

Bellbell28 −  NTA- they slashed his tires? How do you fix slashed tires? Your family is not doing pranks they are awful bully’s and terrorizing him.

SaikaTheCasual −  NTA. Not only uninvite them, you should cut contact completely. This is dangerous and just irresponsible. I would have cut them off after them slashing his tires already.

Purple-Trouble-5943 −  THEY HID HIS INHALER?! Sheesh….. As a registered nurse, all I can say is that is despicable and they could have potentially put his life in danger.

EveryBlackberry1477 −  NTA. They aren’t pranking him, they are bullying him. TPing a house is a prank. Hiding lifesaving medication is not a prank, not even if they say they were going to give it back. Lots of things can go wrong and they have no idea how big it can be until it hits them on the head. You don’t invite your bullies to your wedding. I’m sorry but the men in your family have a very toxic view of masculinity. Having a chronic condition doesn’t make you less of a man. Your fiancè is a trooper for putting up with them.

[Reddit User] −  Dude yta for allowing this to go on as long as it has. Your poor fiancé has been suffering. He has asthma and they could have killed him the first time they took it. How was that not it for you? Or the time they *slashed his tired???* Thats some p**cho s**t. How he didn’t dip after that I just don’t understand.

Apologize to this man. You’ve subjected him to a lot and you’ve let A LOT slide. Too much. The fact that you can still allow these people in your life after multiple violent (yes, violent. violence isn’t just physical aggression against an individual.) acts against the man you claim to love.

TypicalManagement680 −  NTA for uninviting them to the wedding but you are huge AH for not shutting their antics down sooner and continuing to subject Tim to these bullies. That is what they are clear and simple and now their pranks have turned deadly. You’re supposed to protect him just like he is you, even if that means from your family. Get it together. ETA: The contact would have ceased after the slashed tires for me.

grighe −  Yeah NTA sorry doesn’t cut it, what if he had an asthma attack? And wanted to see if he was “man” enough to go through it without his inhaler, this is so toxic. You don’t need them at your wedding and honestly? If your mother ends up not going at least she has made her choice and you know that. Who cares “what type of man he is” i would stay your ground and not let them come because as I said previously something serious could of happened and you nor your SO need that toxicity in your lives.