AITA for “trying to sabotage” my mothers marriage?

A Reddit user shared a story about the fallout between her mother and stepfather after they discovered her spending time with her stepbrother. Despite the user’s attempts to keep things civil, her mom accused her of trying to sabotage the marriage. Now, the user is staying with a friend due to ongoing arguments. Read on to learn more about the situation.

‘ AITA for “trying to sabotage” my mothers marriage?’

I18f live with my mother and her new husband. They’ve been married for almost 5 months, together for 2 years. Their relationship was very private, my father passed away only 4 years ago n I was never that happy with my mom moving on so quickly so she kept this from me.

I only found officially met his son(20) about 3 months before the marriage. He has his own apartment, and doesn’t live with us. The first few weeks we met, we got drunk and hooked up. We knew it wasn’t a good idea, but did it anyways and kept it a secret.

About 2 months our parents caught us together bc they showed up to his apartment unannounced. I guess it caused a lot of issues between my mom and his dad and my mom demanded me to stop seeing him.

We stopped seeing each other for a bit, but this past weekend we had Mother’s Day dinner and we went up to my room and we’re just playing on my ps4 but my when our parents came up n saw us they got the wrong idea and completely freaked out.

They’ve been fighting between each other now nonstop. My mom says I caused this, and I’m trying to sabotage her marriage and that I was never happy about it from the start. Her and I got into a big argument and I’ve been staying with a friend. AITA?

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

Curious-One4595 −  NTA. .  Awkward as hell? Yes. Done with malicious intent? No. Why are they fighting with each other about it? They should back off and mind their own business. Check your local laws but this is not morally i**est and, in most places, not legal i**est. The squickiness some people feel about it comes from it feeling i**est adjacent, but it’s really not. Obviously, a choice with lots of risk though, as you have learned.

Samarkand457 −  Well, you certainly inherited your mom’s taste in men…

ReviewOk929 −  NTA. 1. You’re 18. 2. He is 20. 3. Nothing wrong with any of that 4. Your mum and step dad need to get over themselves and start acting like adults.

Asleep_Koala_3860 −  Reverse UNO your mom – they’re trying to sabotage your relationship

BoysenberryFar6127 −  They’re not related and met as young adults. Awkward but not incestuous.

doesntgetthepicture −  NTA. You seem to lack good judgement, but based on how you presented the story, you didn’t hook up with him maliciously, but you also knew the problems it would cause, and that didn’t stop you. It doesn’t make you an AH, it just makes you a teenager.

Now if you only hooked up with him with malicious intent, to create a rift with your mom, then that’s not only AH territory, but something you should see a therapist for because that is very unhealthy.

But that doesn’t seem to be the case here, as it takes two to tango, and unless he is also using s** as a way to s**ew up his father’s marriage then I see no reason why you would be an AH.

And I can very easily see two young adults (teenagers really) getting drunk, being a little attracted to the other, and bonding over the weird situation they are in, and having s**. If anything I think you’re folks are focusing too much on how it effects them, and not enough considering what the two of you are going through.

ArtisticWolverine −  Its not that bad. My aunt got remarried and her new husband had an 18 year old son. One day her husband caught her and his son in bed together. Now that’s a way to ruin a marriage…

star_b_nettor −  NTA. You would not be, and will not be, the first or last set of steps to do this. It’s awkward, but your mother and his father both need to get over what two consenting adults do when there is no blood relations between them.

RazzleDazzle722 −  NTA. Why are you at fault for supposedly ruining her marriage and not your step brother? Did he not equally participate in this incestuous c**astrophe? This story certainly is bizarre and probably won’t end well for anyone, but I don’t see how it’s solely your fault.

MrJ_Sar −  ESH. Two years, while not enough for you, is for her. There is no correct amount of time to mourn someone. However her response to you and your (edit) step brother is kinda’ nuts considering there’s no brother/sister relationship.

Do you think the user’s mom is being fair in her accusations, or should she try to understand her daughter’s perspective? How would you handle family boundaries in this kind of blended family situation? Share your thoughts below!