AITA for threatening to call the police, against my MIL after she took my kids without permission?
A Redditor shares a tense situation with her mother-in-law, who took her children without permission, despite prior agreements. After being told repeatedly that the children were not to stay at her MIL’s house, she went against the parents’ wishes and took them anyway.
When confronted, the MIL defended her actions, but the user threatened to call the police if it happened again. Now, her husband agrees the MIL was in the wrong, but thinks the user overreacted with the threat. Read the full story below for the details of this heated family conflict.
‘ AITA for threatening to call the police, against my MIL after she took my kids without permission? ‘
I (34F) have always had a tough relationship with my MIL (60F). She’s been pushing us to send our kids (7F and 10M) to her house more often ever since her divorce, but my husband (37M) and I aren’t comfortable with it. She has a lot of boyfriends coming and going, and while that’s her business, I don’t want my kids around strangers.
My son even mentioned once that he didn’t feel comfortable around one of her boyfriends, and that was enough for me to draw a line. My husband agreed, so we’ve stuck to the rule: if she wants to see the kids, she can either come to our place or we can meet somewhere else.
She doesn’t like this and has complained plenty, but we’ve been firm about it. This weekend, though, things blew up. She offered to watch the kids while my husband and I ran errands, which we thought was her way of trying to make peace. She came over, and everything seemed fine when we left.
But when we got home, she and the kids were gone. I called her immediately, and she casually told me they were at her house. She said the kids missed her and were going to stay the night. I was furious. This was NOT what we agreed to. My husband tried to calm me down, saying it was fine and that we could relax for the evening.
I reminded him why we don’t send the kids to her house, especially with her boyfriend around. My husband called her to ask if he was there, and she swore he wasn’t. But I didn’t trust her. We drove to her place, and guess what? Her boyfriend’s car was parked outside.
We knocked on the door and told her we decided we wanted to have dinner with the kids instead. We were polite to avoid making a scene, but she went off. She accused us of judging her for having a boyfriend and trying to control her life. I snapped and told her if she ever took my kids without permission again, I’d call the police.
She started crying and yelling, and we left with the kids. Now my husband says he agrees with me that what she did was wrong, but he thinks I didn’t need to yell or threaten her. I don’t feel bad about it, though. She crossed a major line, and I feel like I had to stand my ground.. AITA?
See what others had to share with OP:
Wed_PennyDreadful13 − So he’s fine with his mom bold-face lying to him?
RaptorOO7 − NTA. You and your husband set rules and she was watching the kids at your house. She took them to her home where her boyfriend was and your kids have been uncomfortable around the boyfriend.
I would refuse to let her be alone with the kids period and yes calling the cops is a very reasonable thing. She can have boyfriends not a problem but you don’t want your kids around them.
4getmenotsnot − She doesn’t get to see the kids as much as she’d like yet the first chance she has to do that she takes them to her house, out of the comfort of their home, to be with boyfriend instead? NTA. Supervised visits from here on out.
pixie-ann − NTA she cannot be trusted. Nothing she says anymore can be believed. Your husband needs a kick in the pants because he is going too soft here and failing to properly care for his children.
Why is she so keen to have the kids over there at the same time as her boyfriend? Is that the boyfriend’s idea? Do you have his full name and if so, do some googling. See if there are any police reports on him.
RoadWarriorMaddMaxx − I hate people who do what THEY want with little to no regards for anyone else. You may have to get a restraining order against your azz hole MIL
Artistic-Giraffe-866 − The boyfriends are the biggest threat to your children ever – il not saying they are but statistically this is where the danger would come from
Time-Improvement6653 − Absolutely. I’m a big fan of causing the most humiliation possible to anyone who oversteps boundaries. Let her cry and yell all she wants – maybe she’ll end up famous from someone’s Karen Meltdown TikTok.
Secret_Sister_Sarah − NTA. The majority of kids who get abused get abused by the boyfriend of their mom. (In this case, grandma.) You’re not wrong to protect your kids, especially since they felt uncomfortable around one of her boyfriends.
And, it’s NEVER okay for someone to take kids out of their parents home and to a second location without asking first. (Unless it’s a \*trusted\* relative who nows the parent will be comfortable with the action.)
Lindensorry − NTA. Listen to your son. He has that creepy feeling for a reason. You should have called the police the moment you got home and the kids weren’t there. She kidnapped your children. The fact that she’s their grandmother is irrelevant.
RevolutionaryCow7961 − NTA. Ask him how he’ll feel if one of mom’s boyfriends assaults one of his kids. Tell him this is your hill to die on and if he won’t protect your children you will.
Do you think the user’s reaction was justified, or did she go too far with her threats? Was there a better way to handle the situation? Share your thoughts and opinions below!