AITA for thinking men should be able to be gynecol*gists too while my gf doesn’t agree?

A Reddit user (18M) is in a heated disagreement with his girlfriend (18F) over whether men should be allowed to become gynecol*gists. After a discussion about a tweet suggesting that gynecol*gy should be exclusive to women, the user feels unfairly criticized, with his girlfriend calling him a pervert and accusing him of not supporting feminism. Read the full story below to delve deeper into their conflicting views.

‘ AITA for thinking men should be able to be gynecol*gists too while my gf doesn’t agree?’

I (18M) recently had a disagreement with my girlfriend (18F) about whether men should be allowed to work as gynecol*gists. It started after I saw a tweet suggesting men should avoid the profession, and I thought that opinion was unfair. When I shared this with my girlfriend, she surprised me by agreeing with the tweet, saying gynecology should be exclusive to women.

I told her I disagreed because I believe some women might feel more comfortable with male gynecol*gists, depending on their preferences. Her response was that it doesn’t matter and that men in the field could be seen as inappropriate. She even said women who prefer male gynecol*gists should simply adapt to having female doctors instead.

To illustrate my perspective, I mentioned my own experience: I’ve sometimes preferred female doctors for certain medical concerns. My girlfriend called that out as problematic and suggested I should only allow male doctors to treat me, implying my preference was inappropriate. Frustrated, I expressed my feelings bluntly, and the conversation escalated. She accused me of not supporting feminism and left, upset.

Later, she posted about the topic online, indirectly referencing our argument. This led to messages from her friends criticizing me, saying I was in the wrong and that my perspective was harmful.

I’m genuinely confused. I feel like supporting personal choice—whether it’s a man choosing to work as a gynecologist or a patient deciding on the gender of their doctor—aligns with equality. However, my girlfriend’s reaction and her friends’ responses have made me question if I’m missing something.

Am I the Jerk?

Additional Context:

• My girlfriend has unfortunately experienced a traumatic incident in the past (unrelated to healthcare), which may influence her views.
• While she’s usually open-minded, her opinions on topics like this can sometimes be strict.
• I plan to talk to her again soon, hoping we can resolve this calmly.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

lydocia −  Men have a right to become gynaecologists. Women have a right to refuse a male one. Edit: getting a bit o**rwhelmed by all the replies so I’m muting this comment. I’m not here to answer any and all questions about trauma and feminism, feel free to do some research on that because many of you desperately need to learn about it.

Aggleclack −  I have a male gyno named “Stacy” and boy it threw me off when I met a large black dude. Super nice guy.

FemalePheromones −  This just in: 18 year olds are f**king stupid.

adobeacrobatreader −  I think there is a healthy middle ground here. Men should be able to become gynecol*gists, but women should have the option to want a woman doctor. My family are devout Muslims, and they prefer to see a woman. NTA. Your relationship sounds exhausting, tho.

Far_Appointment_8654 −  I had a male gyno and i asked him why he chose this field. He said he helps hundreds of people to conceive. Helping bring life is why he chose it.

bears_vw −  Women deserve the best medical care and that shouldn’t be limited to one gender. If your friend doesn’t want to see a man, that’s her right and preference.

Competitive_Town_253 −  NTA, men can certainly be gynecol*gists. But please understand that some women may feel more comfortable being seen by female gynecol*gists.

user_is_suspended −  Its okay for a women to insist on a female doctor, especially their gynecologist. Its not okay for a women to insist that only female doctors treat females, even gynecol*gists. Just because your preferences are valid doesn’t give you authority to impose them on others.

YakElectronic6713 −  If only women were allowed to be gynecol*gists, then there might be a shortage of gynecol*gists. I, personally, don’t give a f**k about the gender of the gynecologist. But I understand that some women prefer a female one. And it’s all fine. But not allowing men into that specialisation? Nah, that’s dumb.

DonTakeMeFi-Idiat −  Your girlfriend is an i**ot.