AITA for telling my to be granddaughter in law some l**d advice after my family asked for some ‘grandmotherly wisdom’?

A grandmother with a playful sense of humor (70s) recently shared a cheeky piece of marriage advice during a family gathering. After her grandson and his fiancée announced their engagement, she was asked to offer some “grandmotherly wisdom.”

Feeling playful, she shared a risqué phrase: “The key to a successful marriage is to keep a man’s stomach full and his balls empty.” While the engaged couple laughed, the rest of the family was horrified. Now, her daughter and granddaughter are upset, saying she ruined the moment. But is a little humor really that inappropriate? Read the story below.

‘ AITA for telling my to be granddaughter in law some l**d advice after my family asked for some ‘grandmotherly wisdom’?’

My good friend Gracie made me aware a few weeks ago of a phrase that made both of us laugh til we were sore, a dirty phrase which is ‘the key to a successful marriage is to keep a mans stomach full and balls empty’.

Both of us are in our 70’s and jovial and sprightly if I may say so. I liked the phrase – it was funny, and it stuck around in my mind. My family are aware I have a filthy sense of humor and I do like to laugh.

My eldest grandson is in his 30’s and recently proposed to his fiancée, they made us aware over it via a family FaceTime session. It was very sweet and everyone was in good spirits, drinking, etc.

My granddaughter and daughter pushed me to say a few words in the way of advice, but frankly I wouldn’t know, and I’m not one to give advice anyway. my grandsons fiancée said no no, give us some wisdom! So I said the phrase and the only people who burst out laughing were my grandson and his fiancée.

Everyone else looked mortified and my granddaughter immediately started berating me. I told my friends this and they think it wasn’t a big deal but my granddaughter and daughter have texted to say I was inappropriate and ruined a moment.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

[Reddit User] −  NTA. You are the type of grandmother I aspire to be!

RolandDeschain1982 −  NTA. The thing about being a grandparent is you can make these jokes as the matriarch/patriarch of the family and everybody else just has to deal. If the couple are the ones that laughed the moment wasn’t ruined.

hotforharissa −  NTA. The couple laughed and weren’t offended, so no one else’s opinion really matters. People are too damn uptight sometimes. Presumably they’re all adults. I still remember a quote from an old lady on an episode of Anthony Bourdain’s show. I think she was Czech, and I may be mistemembering, but it was something along the line of “How to know if your man is cheating when he’s away? Put his balls in water. If they sink, he’s been faithful.” still makes me laugh.

MagogHaveMercy −  Beyond the fact that your advice was awesome, (and it was!), they asked you repeatedly to say something. Since your wisdom so clearly offends them, I bet they won’t ask for it so persistently in the future.. NTA.

tnmcd006 −  NTA. That’s hilarious.

[Reddit User] −  NTA. I wish you were my grandmother! You’re hilarious. On a more serious note, the joke was intended for your granddaughter in law, and she found it funny. The rest of the family shouldn’t have a problem with it.

AllRedditIDsAreUsed −  Congrats on the impending family expansion! ESH, you very slightly because the sentiment is sexist, even though it’s a joke that’s in good fun. Your granddaughter and daughter seem to have a lot of opinions about what you should and shouldn’t be doing, which is TA. You sound like a wonderful grandma.

nanon_2 −  NAH.It depends on context tbh. In my terribly sexist culture if my grandmother-in-law had said something like this in front of the whole family it would be equivalent to asking whether I made perfect round rotis and I would be upset because the power dynamic skews so heavily with the in-laws, and I am likely to move into their house after marriage. Here, it seems like maybe it wasn’t the same context? But honestly, that phrase sucks, shrug.. Edit: Grammar.

turningmyluckaround −  NTA although it’s kind of misogynistic because it implies that the work is in a woman to keep a marriage happy, it obviously was just meant as a stupid saying. If the couple weren’t uncomfortable with it, it was the others who “ruined the moment” by starting a fight about it.

HarperL88 −  My grandmother told me to try before you buy!

Do you think humor has a place in special family moments like these? Or should certain jokes be saved for more private settings? Share your thoughts! Is this grandmother really the one who crossed a line, or is the family taking things too seriously?