AITA for telling my stepdaughter she’s absolutely under no circumstances allowed to switch out my cats food for vegan food even though she’s losing weight because the sight of normal cat food makes her sick?
A Reddit user shared a conflict with their stepdaughter, who has become increasingly unhappy with the way the household operates, especially regarding their cat, Mango. Mango is fed a meat-based diet, which makes the stepdaughter so sick she’s been losing weight.
She insists on switching his food to vegan options, but the Redditor and her husband refuse, stating that Mango’s health and preferences are non-negotiable. Tensions have escalated, with the stepdaughter even involving her grandmother. Is the Redditor right to stand firm on their cat’s diet, or are they being insensitive to their stepdaughter’s struggles? Read the full story below.
‘ AITA for telling my stepdaughter she’s absolutely under no circumstances allowed to switch out my cats food for vegan food even though she’s losing weight because the sight of normal cat food makes her sick?’
Sorry for the appalling title. My stepdaughter is living with my husband and I for the next year. Shes an educated young professional who’s saving up to buy her own home. Since she’s moved in with us (past 3 months) she’s become increasingly snappy and unhappy with how her dad and I run our lives.
We aren’t environmentally conscious enough because we don’t compost our waste, we are negligent because we leave lights on when we leave our home for security reasons, we should switch to electric cars, we are contributing to the inhumane treatment of cows by consuming dairy, the list is endless.
My cat Mango is getting to be an old ass man and he has lived a full life of eating whatever the f**k he likes (obviously within what’s safe for a cat) and hes happy that way. My stepdaughter is now insisting she will purchase vegan cat food because seeing Mango eat meat makes her sick.
We feed him in the kitchen and she will literally throw up / retch/ leave the kitchen if she sees him eat meat. She HAS lost a lot of weight since claiming that seeing Mango eat meat makes her sick, and we leave out dry biscuits for him to snack on which also makes her sick. It’s not like we leave mess out but even if she smells his food in the am (which is gross, yeah, but the doors are open and that’s just life if you have a pet) she will heave and walk away.
Her dad and I both told her if she’s unhappy with it she needs to find someplace else to live and although we are genuinely sorry she’s lost her appetite and has lost weight we aren’t going to change Mangos lifestyle- she has yelled, cursed at us, cried, begged, etc, but no, we are NOT happy with Mango eating a vegan diet.
We don’t feed him cheap crap either, we feed him food quality cat food that isn’t processed or full of sugar or grain. It’s pretty much gourmet Gordon Ramsey worthy cat food. My MIL has waded in after my stepdaughter told her we were being unfair by refusing to let Mango go on her preferred diet for him, and is accusing us of being cruel and shortsighted. She says we are letting her get sick, and that Mango won’t hurt from a change in diet but stepdaughter is hurting.
Here’s what the community had to contribute:
PaigeS91 − NTA.
Veterinary nurse here. As explained above, cats are obligate carnivores, they absolutely need the taurine that only meat can provide. Cats cant thrive on a vegan diet. My mom is a pretty hardcore vegan and still feeds all her pets a species appropriate diet because she aware that’s what they need to be the healthiest they can be.
CarmineFields − NTA Cats are obligate carnivores and they will sicken and die without meat.
Elli_Khoraz − NTA. Pets can, and have, died whe irresponsible owners force their dietary beliefs on them.
Cats aren’t made to be vegan. She is being unreasonable, plus it’s your house – she shouldn’t be making all these demands on you at all.
Ermithecow − NTA.
Cats cannot under any circumstances be vegan. They need meat. I have a vegan friends who still feed their cats meat because it’s their choice to be vegan, not the cats who couldn’t be even if he was sentient enough to want to be.
If she cares about animals and the environment so much, why would she want to actually harm a cat by feeding it unsuitable food? Why does she have to be in the room while the cat is eating his meat? Cat meat smells gross sure and that’s probably worse for a vegan. But she doesn’t have to watch the cat eat.
JeepersCreepers74 − NTA. I was vegan for a while and know many vegans and all are able to be in a room while other people or animals are eating meat–it’s nearly impossible to live a life in vegan isolation. Plus, if she gets sick just seeing Mango eat a dry biscuit, is buying vegan cat food really going to solve the problem?
This is pure speculation without more information, but is it possible your stepdaughter has some mental/emotional issues (an eating disorder, OCD) that are causing her to get sick and lose weight and that she is blaming on the cat? Or is it possible she is hoping her dad or grandmother will take pity on her and put a down payment on that new house before she can afford it herself?
CorrectSherbet5 − NTA. This chick is the reason people hate Vegans
PretentiousUsername1 − Throw the whole stepdaugher out. NTA.
alittlegirllost − You’re stepdaughter: “Im so vegan, I vomit at the sight of animal cruelty”
Also your stepdaughter: “Please perform animal cruelty on your pet for my personal comfort”
My kitty gets fed mostly a diet of pig hearts, which I buy whole and chop for her in my kitchen, if you feel like being really passive aggressive and having a super healthy cat.
[Reddit User] − It sounds like your stepdaughter has an eating disorder and is using the cat’s food/her own vegan diet as an excuse. It’s hard to convince someone to change but you should be aware this might be happening.
NTA, of course you can’t put a cat on a vegan diet.
[Reddit User] − NTA. Cats are obligate carnivores. That means they don’t have a choice when it comes to eating meat. Your husband needs to tell your stepdaughter this isn’t up for discussion any longer. (And maybe get her to a doctor, because if she can’t deal with even the slightest exposure to meat, she’s going to have a rough time of it.)
Do you think the Redditor’s refusal to change Mango’s diet was justified, or should they have considered their stepdaughter’s emotional and physical struggles more? How would you handle a similar situation between family members with differing values? Share your thoughts below!