AITA for telling my sister to stop telling people that she has my illness to gain sympathy for being overweight?

A Redditor (22F) discovers her older sister (25F) has been lying for years about having a thyroid condition to explain her weight gain and gain sympathy. When confronted, the sister breaks down, claiming she didn’t want people to judge her.

The situation escalates when the Redditor’s parents defend the sister, even admitting they wished she had the condition to justify her struggles. Was the Redditor too harsh in calling out the lie, or is the family enabling unhealthy behavior? Read the full story below…

‘ AITA for telling my sister to stop telling people that she has my illness to gain sympathy for being overweight?’

I (22f) have an older sister (25f). My sister is very sensitive about everything. When we were young, if I made the smallest comment like “I prefer pink over blue” it would make her cry because she thought I was aiming at her by saying it. My parents would always ask me to apologise to her since she’s sensitive and I’m “emotionally stronger” than her.

My parents never controlled my sister’s diet growing up, letting her have what she wants since they found it too difficult to control her. I was skinny as a stick when I was a kid, so even though my family has a long history of thyroid disease my parents didn’t think there was an issue with me.

However, my sister has been overweight the majority of her life, so my parents thought she’d be the one with the thyroid issues. They took us to an endocrinologist when I was 10. I got a diagnosis for Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis while my sister didn’t, and instead got told to exercise and watch her diet.

I got hypothyroidism due to Hashimoto’s, and have been on medication ever since. My sister and I moved back in with our parents due to what’s happening these days. I leave my medication in a cabinet near the kitchen since I know I won’t take it unless I have to actually get out of bed to do so.

Apparently, I left a box before I moved out of my parents house when I was a teen and one of her friends saw it while they were over and asked if it was hers. My sister told them that it was, and that’s why she was overweight. The box has “Euthyrox” written on it in big bold letters with a little picture of a thyroid gland next to it.

So yeah, pretty obvious it was meant for a thyroid condition. She’s held up this farce for almost 4 years. I only figured it out when I saw her take a box of it out of my bag one day. I confront her on it, and she starts crying and telling me that she just didn’t want anyone to mean to her because she’s fat.

She also says that it’s not fair that the one with the normal weight gets the thyroid disease. I’m just staring at her gobsmacked. She’s complaining that she doesn’t have an auto immune condition? I tell her to knock it off, and that she can’t lie to get sympathy from people.

My parents talk to me later, and they say that I was too harsh calling her a l**r and she probably needs a therapist or something and the classic “I should apologise since I’m more mature”. They even tell me that they were hoping that she was the one with the thyroid issues as a child, so that they could justify her weight gain.

I ask them “so you wanted your daughter to be sick instead of admitting that it’s your fault because you bought her mcdonalds whenever she wanted it, and never made her exercise?”.

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

DTH217 −  Definitely NTA. And what the hell did I just read? Your sister is jealous of your thyroid disease because it would justify her being overweight?

HannahBakerrrrrrrrrr −  NTA. Your sister sounds like a self-absorbed narcissist, who’s pushing her unwillingness to get into shape and lose some weight on you. She’s toxic and m**ipulative.

nomorevolume −  NTA – you’re absolutely in the right here, I can’t believe she actually tried to steal your meds from you! She needs to see a therapist to deal with the hypersensitivity, and your parents can’t continue to encourage/reinforce it which it sounds like they’ve done since childhood. Take care, I hope everything works out!

__ALLthe-TimE −  I’ve never commented on one of these threads. I’m going to pipe up with a very strong NTA on this one because what in the actual f**k? My wife’s autoimmune disease costs us tens of thousands of dollars a year to keep her alive and healthy so she can be here for our children.

Anyone who would fake an illness to begin with needs help. To fake something that is so misunderstood by the general public to begin with just makes my blood boil. It’s hard enough getting people to understand that just because they can’t physically see something wrong there isn’t.

And then you get narcissistic people like your sister that make the entire situation worse as far as trying to educate people. She thinks it’s a f**king joke. You need to call your parents out on their b**lshit.

As well as call your sister out again on her b**lshit. Then I would think all y’all need some therapy as a family. OP you seem to have your head on straight and I hope for your sake things work out well.

Break_Away_1776 −  Nta – Geez your sister needs therapy.

[Reddit User] −  NTA. She’s lying to herself and to others. She needs to take responsibility for herself instead of trying to pin it on a condition she doesn’t have and your parents need to take responsibility for not making sure she developed proper eating habits while growing up.

Saywihee −  NTA – Tell your parents that “emotional sensitivity” wouldn’t justify anything to a judge, and so it shouldn’t justify her lying here. If they aren’t going to hold her accountable for her actions. reality is going to hit her like a freight train because reality will eventually hold us all accountable.

joenorse −  Your parents are mad at you because they’re embarrassed and ashamed that they didn’t nip your sister’s stupid s**t in the bud years ago. It is easier to pressure you for their wanted behavior from you than to address your sister. Your sister needs a world of help. This isn’t on you.. Edit: NTA

[Reddit User] −  NTA. The truth hurts. Your family takes no responsibility. Stop apologizing for things that are their fault.

pacingpilot −  INFO: Are you the only sane person in your family?

Should the Redditor have handled the situation with more sensitivity, or is the sister in the wrong for misleading others about a serious medical condition? How should the family address these underlying issues? Share your thoughts below!