AITA for telling my roomates I’m only paying 1/4 of the rent+utilities going forward ?

A roommate proposed paying only one-fourth of the rent and utilities since her roommates now have a baby, who occupies an additional room and increases electricity usage. She believes it’s fair for the couple to cover a larger share as they’re now a household of three.

Her roommates were furious, accusing her of being selfish and even saying she must not care for their child. The situation escalated, leaving her questioning if she’s in the wrong. Read the original story below…

‘ AITA for telling my roomates I’m only paying 1/4 of the rent+utilities going forward ?’

So I’ve lived with my roomates for 4 years now splitting the bills by the # of people in the household. in April of 2023 they welcomed their daughter into this world whom I was in the room to watch be delivered. Since then, our electric has steadily increased and the baby has gotten her own room.

Therefore in my mind they’re occupying more of the house #1, and #2 using more electricity for the baby whether it be heating tons of water, or putting on Ms Rachel for hours as examples.

Recently (within the last 3 days) I felt comfortable enough to talk to them about it and told them it would be fair if they paid 3/4 of rent and utilities as they are 3 people now and I’m only 1.

They reacted by saying I’m being s**fish, I’m in denial, and that I’m dead to them and the most too faced person they’ve ever met. To top it all off they told me I must not love their daughter and that the way I view it just isn’t the way they see it.

My boyfriend also spends the night frequently but is only at the house when I’m there meaning when I get home I tell him to come over and when I leave he leaves to not disrupt the household as he doesn’t live there. AITA

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

eefr −  NTA. Your reasoning seems sound to me: you are 1/4 of the people so you pay 1/4 of the bill.  They’re free to disagree and negotiate, but calling you two-faced and saying you’re dead to them because you brought up the topic of expenses is a bit much.

They sound exhausting. If they can’t have a reasonable conversation about this like adults, maybe it’s time to move out.

Trevena_Ice −  NTA. And their reaction to this topic is strange and over the top. Maybe they had a bad day? Do you know about their finaciel situation? Are they struggeling? Maybe try to talk to them again about this topic – it sounds fair.

Unless it was a situation before, where the roomates shared a room and you had your own room (befor baby was born), while everyone paid the same. Generell it should be something like rent be split by the size of the private room (so people living in a bigger bedroom pay more) and all commun areas divided by the number of persons in the rental.

Utilities should be split per person. If they still are this harsh if you try to talk to them again, okay, so be it. Then tell them, if you are dead to them, you are looking into terminating the lease and are looking for another space to live

Help24-7 −  ESH If they occupy more space and use more utilities…then yes they should pay more. However you’ve been dishonest on here about why they are so upset. Your new boyfriend is there EVERY SINGLE DAY…. So he’s also taking up space and using utilities as well.

I don’t care how many times he showers or flushes vs the baby….. He’s physically always present…either split the bill 5 ways or only have him over 1 or 2 times a week to visit. Saying he only sleeps their 2 nights but the other 5 days he’s there all day and leaves to go home before midnight so it “doesn’t count”….that’s ridiculous.

Big-Cloud-6719 −  If you are having your BF stay over and haven’t discussed this with them in advance, then ESH. Even if he doesn’t leave your room (which I doubt, sorry), he’s using resources.

toyetik −  YTA. Purely bc you left out YOUR BOYFRIEND SLEEPS OVER EVERY NIGHT! 

AlmightyBlobby −  yta for leaving out the stuff about your boyfriend being there all day everyday 

chaosilike −  INFO: You said your BF is there everyday, is he using the communal space? Does he cook meals, watch TV in the living room, do laundry? What was the spare room used for? Were utilities raised by alot? Why wouldn’t utilities be still split 50/50 and they pay the additional increase or were utilities raised by 25%?

MrBoo843 −  YTA That baby counts as much as a +1 for them as your boyfriend does.

pyrrhaHA −  NTA from what you’ve written, although their reaction sounds so unbelievably over the top I honestly suspect there’s more to this. The one thing that does send you slightly into AH territory would be if you gave them no notice of your plans to reduce your contribution.

It sounds like you decided to stop paying 1/3 with only a couple of days notice . The 3/4 of the rent is probably a little overdone. I assume you share a kitchen, laundry and bathroom area. 60-40 might have been a fairer split of rent based on total space usage (especially if they share a bedroom),

but you have 33% already, so you’re getting a good deal. I can see why a 25-75 split of bills could be fair as there is a lot of laundry involved with kids that age. BUT… this sounds really weird to me. Surely you discussed this in the 6 (at least) months before the child arrived?

You should have foreseen that their family space required in the house would increase and the household bills would go up. The time to discuss changed contributions to rent and utilities was before the child arrived, not a year afterwards.

ArcaneArcher89 −  YTA. In the comments you say your bf is only there form 6pm to 8am every night. So, like the entire non-work day. And probably weekends. Your boyfriend essentially lives there. He just has somewhere else he goes during the day.

You already and a 2-1 split for them using two bedrooms vs your 1. Did the utilities go up when your bf moved in? I bet they did. But you didn’t offer to split utilities 50:50 then?  I’d probably blow up at you too. Just move somewhere with your bf and leave your roommates alone.

Is it fair for her to pay less, or should rent still be split equally? Share your thoughts below!