AITA for telling my neighbor to grow up, get a life, and get the f**k over the fact that I painted my house a color he doesn’t like?
A Redditor recently shared their frustration with their neighbor, Paul, who has been constantly complaining about the colorful updates the Redditor made to their home and front yard.
The Redditor had repainted their house in a palette of peach, sage, and blues and added fun touches like painted pavers with ladybugs and turtles. Despite repeated reassurances that the home was theirs to decorate as they pleased, Paul continued to criticize.
Finally, after Paul complained about the pavers, the Redditor snapped and told him to “grow up” and “get a life.” Now, the Redditor is wondering if they overstepped in their response. Read the full story below to see how this situation unfolded…
‘ AITA for telling my neighbor to grow up, get a life, and get the f**k over the fact that I painted my house a color he doesn’t like?’
I bought a house in a community without an HOA I wanted my home to be MY home, and that includes making it look the way that I want. I also chose a neighborhood that already has fun, colorful houses instead of just plain earth tones.
I finally got to the point where I could repaint my house. I picked a soft peachy color with sage, blue, and soft and dark pink accents. Fun and colorful without being too out there. I think if you google “coolors blue sage peach” you’ll see a similar palette.
My neighbor Paul f**king hates it and has been complaining since we started the project. He also made his opinion known that he hates our front lawn (lots of wildflowers and sunflowers, fun garden flags, a Little Free Library, etc).
Each and every time, I’ve told him that I don’t care. Truly, I don’t. And I’ve suggested a few times that maybe he’d be happier in a HOA community that has control over everything and forces people into having earth toned homes.
Paul got angry when I suggested that and said he’s lived in his home for 15 years and shouldn’t have to move. I told him okay, well you’ll have to learn to live with a little color. Last weekend I was putting in pavers that my niece and I had painted together.
They’re all things like ladybugs, turtles, birds, etc in fun colors. I adore them and my niece is so excited she gets to be a part of my home. Paul came over to complain yet again, saying it was all an “eyesore” and my niece was here, so I just told him “It’s time for you to grow up and get the f**k over what I’m doing with my house.”
He got even pissier and told me that I have no right to talk to him this way, do I know who I’m talking to, etc. I told him to just go away and get a f**king life. If he has so much free time to b**ch and moan about a colorful house, maybe he should get a hobby.
He stormed off, calling me a n**ty piece of work. My niece was cracking up on the side. For the record, no one in my family is uptight, we really don’t care about cursing. I know some people still clutch their pearls over it around kids (she’s 15) but I’m sure she says worse.
Anyway one of the other neighbors came to tell me that he’s been flapping his yap about how disrespectful I am to talk to him like that. She told me that she knows he’s a pain, but that he has been in the neighborhood forever and it’s worth being nice to him. I don’t know. Is telling him to get a life that big of a deal? AITA?
Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:
NanaLeonie − NTA. The house’s color scheme sounds gorgeous – something we’d have here in our Inman Park neighborhood. My guess is your neighbor is more upset about the kitchy items in your front yard than the color of your house. Maybe you need some pink flamingoes. 🥰
mmwhatchasaiyan − Next time he comes by with a complaint: “Hi Paul, I put some serious thought into your criticisms over my house. I think we could come to an agreement where if you start to pay my mortgage and my bills, then I will happily adjust the aesthetic of my home to your liking.
We could start Aug 1? Does that work for you? Otherwise, as the person paying the bills here, I’m going to continue doing whatever I want with my property, and will ask you to not approach me or my property again for this matter.”
Or a simple “Get F’d Paul”. Up to you. Either way, NTA.
forgeris − NTA, some people just don’t understand when you try to be polite with them, so it is not your fault that you told them to f-off, it is their fault. I bet other people would just fall down on their knees and praise this neighbor and do whatever he wants, yeah right.
I always am very polite, but if other people do not understand or don’t want to understand I become very rude, this saves me a lot of time in future because these people know what I will tell them and they don’t even try to pull more crap on me as it just doesn’t work.
catskilkid − NTA. He comes harassing you and you need to be nice? Riddle me that one? If the neighbor who is suggesting you be nice has ANY suggestions on how to keep this blowhard out of you face/property, that would be more helpful then “kids its both your fault” advice.
It may take two to fight, but he is the only one creating the situation. You can’t walk away, it’s your house, so he is actively seeking conflict BUT is offended that he is called out. You do you and you are NTA!
Trick_Delivery4609 − NTA. There was a reddit post where the OP painted it yellow and as soon as she went out of town, her neighbors contacted a company to paint it neutral. Huge drama happens after, police called, etc. So maybe put up some cameras, haha.
He sounds like he is a grumpy old man and does need a life. If he was my neighbor, I’d “kill him with kindness” as my mamma used to say. It is better to have neighbors who look out for each other than scheme against each other.
PhAiLMeRrY − I have hated every pink house I’ve ever seen. Even matte peach… it’s the worst color you cant paint a house other than purple. That being said, it’s your house. The end.
[Reddit User] − NTA. Just because he’s “Been in the neighborhood forever” doesn’t give him any rights. It’s not a seniority system. If he doesn’t like he is cordially invited to pound salt up a hole. Get a camera, because this ***IS*** the kind of cat that will vandalize your yard.
extinct_diplodocus − NTA. Your neighbor is deluded to think his opinion matters. It’s your house, and your right to decorate as you choose. And isn’t it great to not have some HOA dictating to you? Tell him his unsolicited criticism is inspiring you to consider fluorescent orange and bright red for your next color scheme.
Apart-Ad-6518 − NTA
“If he has so much free time to b***h and moan about a colorful house, maybe he should get a hobby”. Exactly. His other choices are to live with your house colors or move. It sounds like he’d fit right into a HOA neighborhood.
sh1tsawantsays − NTA, tell your “neighbor” if he would like to have the right to dictate paint colors or landscaping choices he is happy to make you an offer on the house. (at 3x market) so he can buy it and then it will be his property and he can do what he likes with it.
But since, it isn’t his property, he can keep his opinions to himself, cause you don’t care what he thinks. Next time he steps foot on your property, inform he he is trespassing and not welcome, involve the police if necessary.
Do you think the Redditor was right to stand their ground and tell their neighbor to get over it, or did they go too far with their response? How would you handle a neighbor constantly criticizing your personal style choices? Share your thoughts and opinions below!
