AITA for telling my friend that not listening to me cost her promotion ?

A 25-year-old man spent three days devising a plan to help his friend, 27, who was up for a promotion. However, she chose to follow another colleague’s less effective plan. When her plan backfired and cost her the promotion, she came to him upset.

He pointed out that she should have listened to him, leading to a fallout between them. Now, she’s not speaking to him. He feels justified in his response but wonders if he went too far. Read the original story below…

‘ AITA for telling my friend that not listening to me cost her promotion ?’

So I(25M) and my friend (27F) were sitting together some days back when she told me about a work related problem she was trying to solve(It would look real good as she was up for a promotion).Seeing how important it was for her,I spent the next 3 days coming up with a plan to solve the problem.

Ngl I was pretty proud of myself for that.When we met again in the evening,I told her the plan and even offered her to help in any way I could. She told me that she had talked to another colleague and he helped her come up with other plan.

I thought that plan was idiotic and I pointed out all the mistakes I could see and told her to not do it.She brushed me aside and said that she had already made up her mind.I was pretty angry/upset had no option but to watch it happen.

3 days later,she comes to my apartment crying and tells me that the her plan actually worsened the problem ten-fold and her boss was pretty pissed.And for cherry on top,that same colleague gets her promotion.I didn’t say

“I told you so” or anything like that but I did not gonna sugarcoat it and told her that she should have listened to me rather than her colleague.As you guessed,now she isn’t talking to me.AITA? Edit-I work in the same field but at a different company

Check out how the community responded:

MemoSupremo666 −  NTA. Some people need a hard “I told you so” sometimes to see how f**king stupid they are. F**k anyone in here who says otherwise with their “you can be right or be kind” b**lshit.

Leomon2020 −  I wouldn’t be surprised if the colleague sabotaged the friend so they(colleague) would get the promotion.

Environmental-Term61 −  NTA. If she was smarter she would have found a solution with her coworker that wasn’t completely brain dead, what you said would happen happened .

Maybe your idea would have been stupid too, but to completely ignore the flaws that you clearly pointed out is on her, not you and you have a right to have said, “I mean, I did point out the flaws that came to happen”

JRCanVan −  I see mostly YTA. No you’re not. In my opinion NTA. You spent 3 days of your time coming up with a plan. You pointed out the mistakes, she took her co-workers plan. Now that same co-worker got the promotion. LOL. I wouldn’t come up with anymore plans in the future.

Sharp_Platform8958 −  Let it go. She’s already facing the consequences for taking advice from a bad source. Don’t even bring it up.

DistrictHot1695 −  Info: do you work in the same field? Are you knowledgeable about her job and the requirements?

amber130490 −  NTA. She went with a coworkers plans and it failed. In all reality, that coworker could have intentionally set her up to fail so that they would get the promotion. Which makes even more sense because they did get it.

She should have used a little more common sense. You had no reason to lead her wrong being at a different company. They did because they were also competing for the promotion.

Fantastic_Deer_3772 −  Yta – why did you get so emotionally invested in solving this? In future just content yourself with knowing they might think “I wish I’d listened…”, if you say it when someone’s actively upset you just become instantly annoying.

Locurilla −  info: did she asked you to fix the problem for her? or are you that guy that HAS to fix everything. tentatively YTA if she didn’t ask for help

_bloop_bloop_bloop__ −  YTA . In general, when you tell someone something, it should be 2 of the following 3 things: true, productive, kind.  “You didn’t get the promotion because you didn’t listen to me” may be true. But it is certainly not kind and I am struggling to see how at this stage it’s productive.

When you first said “I see flaws in the other plan” it was both productive and true, therefore we’ll within the rights of a friendship to bring up. But at this point you’re just rubbing it in. I don’t see how it’s productive to a friendship to keep digging when someone is already hurting and they can’t fix it.

If you separately want to bring up feeling hurt she didn’t trust you or that you felt like you did a lot of work to help her that she didn’t acknowledge, then those may be productive to furthering the relationship, but that’s not what you’re talking about here.

Was he right to point out her mistake, or did he overstep in a moment of vulnerability? What do you think? Share your thoughts below!