AITA for telling my friend I won’t be inviting her out anymore?

Navigating group outings can be a juggling act of courtesy and personal boundaries—especially when children become part of the equation. In this story, the narrator invited a friend, Mary, to a Halloween-themed amusement park outing, fully aware that it wasn’t a kid-friendly event. Despite repeated warnings, Mary brought her two young children, who were overwhelmed by the spooky sights and late-night atmosphere. The result? A night filled with tears, screams, and general chaos.
The narrator and the rest of the group did their best to accommodate Mary’s kids, but things quickly spiraled when Mary left them behind to enjoy rides on her own. Tensions rose so high that once the night finally ended, the narrator bluntly told Mary she wouldn’t be invited on future outings. The fallout? Blocks on social media, accusations of harshness, and a lingering question: was the narrator right to speak up?
‘Â AITA for telling my friend I won’t be inviting her out anymore?’
Strained social dynamics often arise when personal needs clash with group expectations. Dr. Melanie Reynolds, a family therapist, points out, “While including a friend’s children in social events can be enriching, it’s critical to ensure the activity is appropriate for young ages.”
Haunted attractions generally cater to teens and adults, and a frightening environment can fuel anxiety and fear in children—particularly those as young as five or under two. “Pushing a child to endure repeated scary scenarios,” Dr. Reynolds notes, “can lead to emotional distress and undermine their trust in a caregiver.”
In this case, Mary’s insistence on bringing her kids despite multiple cautions set everyone up for stress. It created a scenario where neither the kids nor the adults could fully enjoy themselves. When parents prioritize their own fun over the child’s comfort, it can signal deeper issues of empathy and boundaries. “Children rely on parents to gauge safety,” Dr. Reynolds explains. “If a parent routinely places them in upsetting situations, it can strain that bond of security.”
Moreover, leaving kids with an unsuspecting or unwilling friend violates basic social courtesy. Child psychologist Dr. Amanda Brooks adds, “Shifting parental responsibility onto someone who didn’t agree to watch the children can foster resentment. It implies a lack of respect for your friend’s time and boundaries.” Indeed, what was meant to be a carefree outing turned into damage control for everyone involved.
Ultimately, openly communicating frustrations can prevent future misunderstandings—though timing and delivery matter. Dr. Reynolds suggests calmer interventions earlier in the night, but she also acknowledges “stronger language can arise when someone’s pushed to their limit.” In this instance, the narrator’s eventual outburst, while blunt, might have been the only way to convey the severity of the disruption. Sometimes, friends who repeatedly ignore boundaries need firm confrontation to understand the impact of their actions.
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
The Reddit crowd had plenty to say, with most commiserating that the kids’ presence was unfair to both the children and the other participants:
Many criticized Mary’s parenting choices, worried about traumatizing young kids in a horror-themed park. Others noted that blocking the narrator afterward seemed like a way for Mary to dodge accountability rather than address the core issue.
Trying to strike a balance between adult-centered fun and child-friendly activities can be tricky, especially when someone insists on bending the rules. At the heart of this conflict was a disregard for both the children’s well-being and the group’s ability to enjoy the night. It begs the question: how much should friends accommodate a parent’s desire to socialize when it doesn’t align with what’s best for the kids involved? We’d love to hear your takes—have you found yourself in a similar bind? How did you handle it?
This friend is repeatedly traumatizing her children and the writer’s only concern is that the children’s reaction to being terrified (crying and melting down) is ruining her own good time. For whatever reason, the friend/mother is causing her children immense emotional harm. The poster and their mother’s lack of caring for these children in their continued distress makes everyone TAO. It does take a village. Poor children if. This selfish mother and her heartless friends are their village.
So this person brings a 4-year old and an 18-month old to an event you’re planning to be at until midnight (red flag #1) despite being told not to bring her kids multiple times (red flag #2), doesn’t take her kids home or at least out of the park for a while when they lose it (red flag #3) and takes the very first opportunity to ditch one of her kids with someone else, after they’ve been upset all night (red flag #4) and then comes along at midnight to the g-d Waffle House (red flag #5), but somehow YOU’RE the AH for pointing out how she’s ruined everyone’s night and you have no interest in hanging out with her again? Nahhh, you’re good, she’s a sh*tty mom, and all the people who didn’t back you deserve whatever stupid behavior Mary brings on them the next time they hang out.