AITA for telling my daughter in law and son that it is too late and I will not change the family vacation plans so they can come ?
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A parent planned a family vacation, asking everyone for their availability early on. The son and daughter-in-law declined, saying the dates didn’t work. However, when they later learned the trip was to Europe, they suddenly wanted to join.
With everything already booked, the parent refused to alter the plans, explaining that adding two more people would require upgrades and extra expenses. Now, the son is angry, calling the parent unfair for not accommodating them. Read the original story below…
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‘ AITA for telling my daughter in law and son that it is too late and I will not change the family vacation plans so they can come ?’
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Here’s what Redditors had to say:
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Should the parent stick to the original plans, or make adjustments to include them? What’s your take? Share your thoughts below!
not the AH.. they didn’t want to go.. not even when various dates were given. they didn”t join the group chat , it wasn’t secret, as they all use it. they had no interest till they found out it was europe. its cut off your nose to spite your face stuff.. tho there could have been some leeway when the changed their minds.
You’re the AH. What I don’t understand is why adult family members aren’t paying their own way…. ? since this seems to be a matter of money on the part of the OP. If the son and DIL can pay for their lodgings and flight, then why can’t they come on this family trip? Or, alternatively, why would a parent refuse to pay for his own son and DIL, if they are paying for everyone else? If OP is that wealthy that they can afford to pay for a number of family members each year for a family vacation, why won’t you pay for your own son and his wife now? Seems petty and spiteful to me.
When asked they said no to both dates and if there was a problem with the stateside vacation, the son could have went to his father and talked to him about going to other places and in the text it said that the adults made the decision on when the kids was old enough to go out the country, i don’t see him being petty how was he to know they was going to say know to both dates, now when she said she could get off now that they are going to Europe, let him know that they lied about not being able to get off, so why lie, why not just tell him that they didn’t want to vacation stateside, sounds like the father pay because he like being with his family and want all to come, and now why should he pay extra for them to come now, it waS a free trip and they lied and now is ass out, they can pay the extra money for the upgrade, he may have gotten it cheaper when he was planning it as to now making these changes last minute.. He is not the ah.
NTA. My 2cents are this- it’s a “Family vacation”. Place of vacation should be a surplus n now if the DIL n son want to go coz of change of location than their priority is the location n not the “Family vacation”. This completely changes the dynamics. So the parent is completely justified in treating them the same way they behaved.
did you guys read this the mother didn’t choose the vacation the other people said since the kids are all older they could leave the country. either you participate in the plans or not, this is what happens when you don’t pay attention & make some effort to continue to communicate or you get left out. If you want to go then make your own plans & be sure you can pay for your place to stay because you usually have to do this in advance. Last time we went somewhere popular we had to make the reservations 6 months in advance. People who wait until they find out the family is going to some place they would like to go to, get left out.