AITA for telling a pregnant woman she shouldn’t park in a handicap spot?

A Reddit user describes a confrontation with a neighbor who parked in a handicapped spot at their local daycare while claiming pregnancy as her reason. The user, deeply empathetic to the struggles of disabled individuals, questions whether they were out of line for calling out the behavior. Read the full story below.

‘ AITA for telling a pregnant woman she shouldn’t park in a handicap spot?’

So today is the second day in a row that I noticed this neighbor of ours parking in the handicap spot at the daycare we take our children to. Her husband went in to drop off their daughter and I saw the mother sitting in their Range Rover in the handicap spot doing her makeup.

I stood in front of their vehicle until she acknowledged me and then pointed at the sign which clearly indicated that it is a handicap spot. She opened up the door and said “I’m 7 months pregnant” in a very confident and authoritative thick English accent, and then closed the door and proceeded to continue putting on her makeup. Keep in mind that she wasn’t driving today (she was yesterday), it was her husband that was driving her.

I then knocked on her door, she opened the window and I told her that being pregnant doesn’t qualify as being handicapped. And she inexplicably said “Thanks” a few times. For those of you that might be wondering why I care — I know plenty of people that are handicapped and my aunt is handicapped and it is not an easy life whatsoever.

So imagine if you’re someone that struggled to get in and out of your vehicle, or even needs to get your own wheelchair out of your own vehicle. Now imagine needing to go somewhere and all of the handicapped spots are taken by entitled clowns that have no right being in these spots. I see this all the time in my city.. but it hits a bit different when it’s a neighbor of ours and they’re doing it so often.

So AITA here? Please downvote this post if you think I am (I really couldn’t care less about the fake internet points). I’ll take the downvotes as the consensus that I’m the true a**hole in the wrong here, not people like her.

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

Robinnoodle −  You think that’s bad OP? I am disabled, albeit not horribly and have a placard. The parking in my apartment buildings has become atrocious. People have started parking in the handicap spots all night (people without stickers). Blocking me out of one, knowing I live here and have a handicap sticker

Competitive_Cod_3843 −  If I engage with apparent violators like this, I usually tell them that they forgot to put up their placard, and they can get a big ticket for that if a cop rolls by. I don’t assume they don’t have it, I just remind them to put it up. They usually just say thanks, and it’s a civil conversation.

People do forget to put them up sometimes. If they don’t have one, they can move or risk the ticket, but I’m not around for that part. NTA. I think they do need to be told.

marmeemarmee −  I understand you think you’re doing a service but as a disabled person please don’t. It’s great to educate friends or family on this but the problem started when you went and said something at all. Even with placards a lot of us, especially with invisible disabilities, will get hassled for using accesible parking spots.

It’s **always** someone that thinks it’s up to them to enforce the rules on supposedly our own behalf. It causes so much anxiety and frustration, I honestly don’t even like leaving the house because of it. If you saw a disabled person waiting for that spot stepping in would make sense. But soft YTA for getting in this argument to begin with

Ruth2018 −  My daughter was able to get a handicap placard when she was pregnant with twins. This person should try to do the same if she needs to use the handicap spots.

teamglider −  You’re kind of weird for bringing her accent into it.

IllustratorSlow1614 −  ESH. The way disabled parking permits work where I live is that the disabled person doesn’t need to be the driver. The permit is so that the disabled person can get to where they need to be safely, whether they’re the driver or the passenger. Pregnancy can also cause temporary disability.

I had SPD so severe in my third and fourth pregnancies that I couldn’t walk without crutches and had the same need of a disabled parking space as anyone else who needed mobility aids. The pain started really early in pregnancy as well, with my last baby I was on crutches from 18 weeks, I was barely showing but I was certainly feeling and suffering from the effects.

You were an AH for pursuing this and confronting her. Knocking on her window is horribly aggressive and could have ended very badly for you if she or another observer felt that she was in danger from you. If you feel strongly enough that this was a violation, report her and let the authorities catch her.

You are not going to persuade her that she’s in the wrong. And you are also not privy to her medical situation – she may not feel comfortable telling you her pelvis is splitting in half. I know I certainly wouldn’t have told any Tom, D**k or Harry on the street. And she’s an AH if she doesn’t genuinely need the space.

BulbasaurRanch −  Take photos of licence plate in the handicapped spot, send to appropriate authorities. Explain it happens daily and at what time. Bylaw would probably love to give an easy ticket at a specific time, knowing this clown will be there.

Interesting-Read-245 −  YTA. I have an invisible disability, it’s people like you, who can’t mind their business, who fill me up with anxiety when I go out and use my placard and park. I understand your intentions but I see it as holier than thou- self righteousness with a dose of hostility.

Approaching her twice? Are you for real? Are you looking to get slapped? How do you just approach people twice thinking it’s ok and that they won’t fear it, call the cops on you for harassment or even strike you?

Unrelated_gringo −  YTA – I’d rather see an **unused** handicapped space being taken by a pregnant woman than being left alone on the off chance that someone else might need it. Also, you’re not the police, bring it up to them if you want, you have no business policing.

hobalotit −  What’s her thick English accent got to do with being an ah or not?

Do you think the user was justified in addressing the misuse of the handicap spot, or was it unnecessary to confront a pregnant neighbor? How would you handle a similar situation? Share your opinions below!