AITA for telling a family to fly private?

A Reddit user shared a dramatic encounter during a flight from NYC to LAX that sparked a heated debate. The user, who has Type 1 diabetes (T1D), needed to snack during the flight due to medical necessity. However, they were seated next to a family with a child who has Prader-Willi syndrome, a condition that causes chronic hunger and emotional distress.

The family asked the OP not to eat to avoid triggering their child’s tantrums. After initially complying, the OP tried to get food from the flight attendant, only for the father to intervene again. Frustrated, OP told the family, “Fly private if you want to control your surroundings,” which led to an argument. Now, the OP is wondering if they were too harsh. Invite people to read the full story below…

‘ AITA for telling a family to fly private?’

I was recently flying from NYC to LAX for a work trip and I had the displeasure of sitting next to a family and a little boy (9). I got on the plane in the midst of issues with my diabetes and I needed to eat within two hours so I began snacking. I immediately began receiving dirty looks from the parents and the mother said “can you not do that? Our son.”

so I put my food away and figured I’d wait until the flight attendant came around so I could buy food from her and eat at an acceptable time just to show some respect for their wishes. So the flight attendant comes by with her beverages and snacks, I start to ask for a Coke and a snack box, but before I can finish the sentence the father says “nothing for this row, we’re all set here” and she continues on.

I go up to press the call light so I can get my food and my drink because I actually need it and the father says “our son has prader-willi, we’d prefer it if you didn’t eat because it causes tantrums when he doesn’t know he can’t eat and he’s always hungry”. I’m close to a tantrum myself at this point and so I look him in the eye and say “I do not care, fly private if you want to control your surroundings”.

The flight attendant comes back and I get my food and my drink, I snarf it down and chug my soda, and I sit back. As soon as I’m calmed and I’m able to open my laptop and get back to work the mother leans in and says “I feel a calling to educate you about my son’s disease” and I felt my entire body clench up.

She keeps talking to me and explaining how I’d made her son feel and I said “listen lady, I don’t f**king care, I’m going to handle my T1D the way I see fit and you’re going to handle your son the way you see fit. I’m not endangering myself because you don’t want to deal with a tantrum, if you want to control other people then you book all the seats in a row or you f**king fly private.”

I recounted the story to a friend of mine once I’d gotten off the plane and she immediately told me that I was a huge AH and I should’ve given them a little bit of grace due to their son’s condition. I kind of feel bad but at the same time, I think that it’s unavoidable if you’re going into public and you’re around others.. AITA?

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

Substantial-Many-865 −  NTA. Even if you didn’t have diabetes. People dont get to come into public space and dictate anyone else’s acceptable behaviour.

SunsetSunnyD −  NTA – do they expect people to stop eating as they walk past a restaurant? Picnics to stop in the park? They can’t continually control his surroundings. Plus the problem isn’t people eating near him, it’s him not understanding what’s going on.

The parents need to explain to him what’s going on, not explain medical things to strangers. If they want to completely control their surroundings then yeah they can fly private or maybe a nighttime flight so they can sleep instead.

dwells2301 −  NTA. Are you supposed to slip into a coma to accommodate their medical issue?

The_Fires_Of_Orc −  NTA. You are 100% correct, if they wanted to control their surrounds, they should have booked the whole row and or flown privately. To expect you to not eat, regardless of your health, was ridiculous. It was rude for the dad to speak on your behalf.

No-Razzmatazz537 −  Absolutely NTA. Those parents were lucky, they could’ve gotten me.

CrimsonPorpoise −  NTA- I feel for the family because I’m sure it’s a very difficult condition to manage and causes a great deal of stress. But their solution to try and manage it is not a great one- you cannot control when other people (especially strangers!) decide to eat- one reason being that many people- yourself included- have their own medical conditions to manage and will have needs that are incompatible with theirs.

Instead of putting the onus on others to avoid triggering a tantrum they need to focus on strategies to help their son manage his emotions when he is feeling frustrated about being unable to eat.

Izzy4162305 −  NTA. How f**king entitled. YOU ALSO HAVE A MEDICAL CONDITION, and yours could have been immediately life-threatening. You should have continued eating the first time, and just said “I have T1D and this food is a medical necessity for me. Your family’s health issues are not my problem, my immediate concern is making sure I don’t end up in diabetic shock.”. Unfuckingbelievable.

frostwave_s550 −  NTA. They should have taken this up with the airline, and not rely on a stranger to accommodate their son.

Affectionate_Ice_658 −  NTA If you know your kid is going to have issues you plan for them. Most Prader Willi kids are on a strict diet but the parents could have scheduled the snack for the airplane ride, their poor planning was not your responsibility.

tpel1tuvok −  I’m finding this one hard to believe. Families with kids with PWS live and breathe control over food access. Meals and snacks happen at set times and places; there are locks on cabinets and refrigerators. They are not worried about “tantrums”.

They are worried that either their child will eat himself to death or that he will suffer extreme emotional stress from observing food he can’t have while everything in his body is signaling to him that he’s starving. For a family like this to stroll onto a plane with no plan beyond bullying their seat-mate out of eating is pretty preposterous.

Of course, ridiculous people exist. But even if the parents were such people, nobody thought of the obvious solution of switching seats? Out of a plane full of people, I’m sure there were at least a few who would be willing to go hungry or switch seats when eating, or whatever it takes to make a food-free bubble around the kid.

Who do you think was in the wrong here? Should people with medical conditions be expected to adjust for others in public spaces, or do both sides need to find a balance? Share your thoughts and experiences below!