AITA for taking a 26 min shower?

Sometimes, a simple shower can turn into a battleground—especially when long, luxurious routines clash with a partner’s expectations. In this story, one woman with thick, long hair enjoys what she calls a “full body shower,” a process that includes washing, conditioning, shaving, and a bit of self-care that lasts 26 minutes. With two bathrooms at home and no pressing schedule, she finds her extended routine perfectly reasonable.

Yet, her partner’s reaction reveals a deeper issue. Instead of appreciating her thorough self-care, they resort to a quirky tactic—running the sink to track water usage. This sparks an argument over water waste and personal freedom, setting the stage for a discussion about fairness, self-expression, and shared household values.

‘AITA for taking a 26 min shower?’

When it comes to personal hygiene and self-care, balance is key. Dermatologist Dr. Joshua Zeichner once explained, “While indulging in a long, relaxing shower can be therapeutic, overdoing it may strip your skin of its natural oils, leading to dryness and irritation.” His insight reminds us that shower routines are highly personal. For some, a 26‑minute session is not about excess but about achieving a complete, satisfying cleanse—especially if thick, long hair is involved.

In many cases, extended showers provide a much-needed escape—a moment of solitude in an otherwise busy day. For our storyteller, this routine is an occasional indulgence, performed only once every few days. On other days, she opts for a quicker wash, ensuring that her self-care doesn’t become a daily ritual of excess. Experts also note that shower duration often varies based on hair type, skin condition, and even mental health needs, suggesting that there is no one “right” length for everyone.

Furthermore, the debate about water usage can sometimes distract from the true purpose of a shower. While environmental considerations are important, the context matters. In a household with ample facilities and no water shortage, a 26‑minute shower—even if it seems long to some—can be perfectly acceptable. It becomes less about the minutes ticking away and more about personal well-being. Dr. Zeichner’s advice, echoed in numerous skin care articles, emphasizes moderation and balance rather than rigid time limits.

Also worth considering is the dynamic between partners. In a healthy relationship, each individual’s needs and routines should be respected. Using unconventional methods—like running the sink to time a shower—may point to underlying issues of control rather than genuine concern for resource conservation. Open dialogue about expectations and household responsibilities can often bridge these differences, ensuring that both partners feel heard and valued.

Ultimately, experts advise that personal care rituals should be tailored to the individual. Whether it takes 10 minutes or 26, what matters most is that the routine leaves you feeling refreshed and cared for. As long as it doesn’t interfere with shared responsibilities or strain the household budget, a longer shower can simply be an expression of self-love and careful maintenance.

These are the responses from Reddit users:

Overall, Reddit users agree that a 26‑minute full body shower is completely reasonable for someone with long, thick hair and extensive grooming needs. Many find the partner’s tactic of running the sink to monitor water use not only ineffective but also controlling.

The consensus is that personal self-care routines vary, and in a home with ample facilities, such a shower isn’t excessive—especially when it’s done only occasionally. Most commenters view the partner’s reaction as more about exerting control than genuine concern for water conservation, and they stand with the OP in her right to enjoy a thorough, unhurried shower.

In the end, the shower debate is more than just about water usage—it’s about respecting each other’s personal rituals and finding balance in shared living spaces. While 26 minutes may seem lengthy to some, it can be a vital act of self-care for others. What are your thoughts? Is there a “right” length for a shower, or should we all have the freedom to enjoy our routines as we see fit? Share your experiences and join the conversation—your perspective might just help someone find the perfect balance between self-care and compromise