AITA for “stealing” a stray cat?

A man and his husband took in a stray cat that wandered into their yard, noticing the cat was malnourished, injured, and unneutered. After posting about the cat on a local lost pets Facebook group, they were contacted by neighbors claiming the cat was a “feral but loved” member of the neighborhood.

The couple decided to take the cat to the Humane Society for proper care and potential adoption, sparking outrage and threats from the neighbors who demanded the cat be released back outside. They now wonder if they’re wrong for keeping the cat to ensure its safety and well-being. Read their story below.

‘ AITA for “stealing” a stray cat?’

I (25m) and my husband (28m) were in our backyard on Saturday when we saw a stray cat in the yard. We usually shoo them away because they stress out our (indoor-only) cat and eat the birds that come to our birdfeeders, so my husband yelled “Hey, shoo!” at the cat.

Instead of running away, the cat came running up to him immediately, meowing a lot. We were like “oh, I wonder if this is the neighbor’s cat or something,” and then noticed he was really skinny, DEFINITELY not neutered, and had a small injury on one foot.

If he was a pet, he definitely wasn’t being taken care of! We thought maybe he was a lost or escaped pet at first, so we caught him and brought him inside to set him up quarantined from our cat with a litter box and food and water.

Humane Society is closed on weekends, so we planned to call them Monday and in the meantime put his image up on our local lost pets Facebook page with our email address. Today, we got an email. Here is the exact text of the email (names changed for anonymity):

“Hi will you please let Bongo out so he can come back towards home. He is a feral cat but he is loved in his neighborhood. He comes to my place all the time and he stays here at night then leaves and comes back later. – Laura.”

Laura and her sister who we’ll call Sarah also responded to our Facebook post about a dozen times saying to let the cat go and asking if we got their email. This gave us a dilemma, because like. The cat’s not her cat, right? This is a neighborhood stray she’s feeding, he’s not neutered, he’s not getting medical care.

We can’t just let an unneutered unvaccinated cat back out on the streets because some people would be sad he’s not wandering around in the road. There’s coyotes in our neighborhood! It’s cold at night! He could get hit by a car or something!

We responded on the Facebook post with “Hi! Yes, we did get your email. In your email you said he is a neighborhood feral, and so does not have an owner or any regular medical care (his back foot is injured, he seems to have some parasites, and he is not fixed).

He’s a fantastic indoor cat and wonderfully suited for adoption, so we’re going to take him by the Humane Society to get veterinary care, a microchip, and ideally a permanent owner.” ABSOLUTE EXPLOSION. Laura and Sarah are now spamming the facebook post threatening to doxx us and call the police on us and show up at our house if we don’t let “their” cat go.

I feel like we’re probably ethically in the right here, but it’s extremely stressful and upsetting. If it was their cat I’d never dream of not returning him, but like. He’s not!!!! They’re not taking care of him!! They’re changing the story now to claim he’s an indoor/outdoor cat, but if that’s the case, why did they email me saying he’s feral? Am I the a**hole for stealing the cat?

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

Marmot_Mountain −  Nta tell them “okay, we let the cat go…btw he seems pretty sick”. Then go ahead and keep him. What are they going to do, call you a l**r? “We let him go and I dunno…he must have died”. If problems continue, call animal control. That’s what they are here for. Btw how would they doxx you? And what are the police going to do, trace your computer over a feral cat?

feminist1946 −  NTA. A lilac point Siamese unneutered male kitten would come over to my house all the time. I found out he lived across the street as an indoor/outdoor cat and that the father would kick him.

Finally he showed up with yellow eyes and I took him to my vet. It was already too late as he had liver damage and leukemia. I told the owners that they could have him back if they paid the vet bills. They never asked again. He died at 7 years of massive cancer in many organs. Keep the cat and find him a caring home before it is too late.

Forward-Dingo1431 −  Well, first of all, you didn’t steal the cat! It sought you out looking for help! He could have limped back to the area of the weird women but even he knew that he wouldn’t be helped by them.

Second, they can march their assessment down to the Humane society and officially adopt him and become legally responsible for his needs and well-being if they truly want to (please,no!) You did what I wish everyone would do (or at the very least make an effort to call someone) not everyone can do what you did though. Good on you! Good luck and update us! NTA

Apart-Ad-6518 −  **NTA**. You aren’t “stealing” the cat. he’s not neutered, he’s not getting medical care. We can’t just let an unneutered unvaccinated cat back out on the streets because. There’s coyotes in our neighborhood! They aren’t taking care of the cat.

we’re going to take him by the Humane Society to *get veterinary care, a microchip, and ideally a permanent owne*r.” You’re doing the best for the cat. Thank you for being so kind. Thanks to you, hopefully he will end up in a caring, loving, secure home. A gift indeed. I hope the kindness you’ve shown this vulnerable cat flows back to you OP. I really do.. Those people are ignorant A Hs.. ETA sentence

grckalck −  NTA. Say to L&S, “If its YOUR cat, then you have been a negligent owner and I will be calling the police to report you for it.” See if that backs them off. Realistically, if you let the cat back outside it will likely return to their place as it is part of its “turf”. Also, this is clearly not a feral cat, as no feral walks up to a human, especially not one it does not know.

Also true ferals do not meow. So the truth is that Bongo is a stray who hung out sometimes with L&S, and probably some others as well. Which IMHO means that you have as much right to Bongo as anyone, and he will have a better life with you than as a stray going from place to place with untreated injuries, a chancy food supply and no medical care.

InterestingBadger932 −  Nta.

– Remove the post as it is just causing drama.

– Block the 2 fools on the social media platform.

– Respond to their email address that you will be speaking with the police regarding their threats to dox you, and suggest they consider their actions. Not sure if the cops can or will do anything, but I’m fairly certain that counts as harassment.

Which_Tangerine8982 −  NTA. It sounds like you’ve done everything perfectly (and morally) correct. Hope he ends up in a wonderful home! 

GladAd7314 −  NTA, the cat dispenser, chose you.

softmiffy −  NTA. You’re doing what’s best for the kitty, who cares if they’ll “miss” him when they’re doing nothing to insure his health or safety

gracemrubyroses −  Nta, and when you take him in get a breakdown of expected costs to make him healthy. Feeding him isn’t taking care of him. If they keep pestering you just detail whatever the vet tells you about him injuries/etc. any person who cares about animals will be on your side.

Do you think the couple is justified in ensuring the cat receives proper care and a safe home, or should they have released it back as the neighbors demanded? How would you handle a situation involving a stray cat like this? Share your thoughts below!