AITA for screaming at my pregnant fiance for not helping me find my dog, who had run off?

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A soon-to-be father is facing backlash after berating his pregnant fiancée when she refused to help search for his runaway dog. While he insists that his panic and fear justified his reaction, others believe that he displayed a shocking lack of empathy for his exhausted and nauseous partner.

But with a dog that escapes at least once a week, is this really about the fiancée’s refusal—or a long-standing issue of irresponsibility?

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‘AITA for screaming at my pregnant fiance for not helping me find my dog, who had run off?’

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Expert Analysis:

The Root Issue: A Chronic Problem with No Resolution

One of the biggest red flags in this situation is that the dog has been escaping regularly for years, yet the owner has not found a permanent solution.

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Dog trainer and behaviorist Sarah Jennings explains: “If a dog repeatedly escapes, it is not an accident—it is a failure of proper containment and training. A responsible owner would have reinforced their fencing, used a GPS tracker, or implemented better recall training long before this became a weekly emergency.”

At this point, the dog’s safety is in jeopardy. Instead of shaming his fiancée for not wanting to participate in a crisis he created, the owner should be taking responsibility and implementing real solutions.

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Pregnancy & Emotional Labor: Why She Refused to Help

Pregnancy, especially at five months, comes with severe fatigue and nausea for many women.

Dr. Melissa Carter, an OB-GYN, notes: “Carrying a child requires immense energy, and exhaustion can feel overwhelming. If a partner continuously expects a pregnant woman to take on physical labor for non-urgent situations, it demonstrates a lack of understanding and support.”

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The fiancée didn’t refuse out of spite—she refused because she was physically drained. The fact that she had repeatedly helped in the past despite her condition shows that she was not being selfish—but was simply at her limit.

Proposed Solutions: How OP Can Fix This Situation

1. Train the Dog & Secure the Yard

  • Hire a professional trainer to work on recall commands and fence boundaries.
  • Install a more secure fence—including dig guards, coyote rollers, or an electric deterrent system.

2. Apologize & Acknowledge His Mistake

  • OP’s explosive reaction was completely inappropriate.
  • Instead of blaming his fiancée, he should apologize sincerely and acknowledge that he unfairly lashed out.

3. Accept Full Responsibility for the Dog

  • If OP’s dog escapes once a week, that is no longer an accident—it is neglect.
  • Instead of expecting his fiancée to chase after the dog, he needs to restructure his routine and ensure the dog is safe and secure.

4. Reevaluate His Role as a Future Father

  • If OP can’t handle a dog’s responsibilities, how will he handle a child who requires even more supervision and care?
  • He must shift his mindset from blaming others to being proactive and responsible.

Here’s what Redditors had to say about the situation:

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What would you do if you were the fiancée? Would you continue to help, or would you have set boundaries sooner? Share your thoughts below!

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