aita for ruining my sister’s wedding.

A Reddit user (24F) shares the painful story of her long-term relationship ending in betrayal when she discovers her ex-fiancé had an affair with her sister. After learning they were getting married, she snapped and crashed a family party, giving a heartfelt “F-you” speech. Despite cutting ties, her sister called to demand the return of her engagement ring, showing no remorse for the betrayal. Read the full story below.

‘ aita for ruining my sister’s wedding.’

I (24f) was with my ex fiancé N (27) since I was 13 and he was 15. He was my first love, my first everything. We got engaged when I was 20 and about 6 months after we found out we were expecting. Unfortunately I miscarried a couple days later. That was the worst moment of our lives.

We always dreamed about starting a family early so this was a major blow to us individually and to our relationship. I fell into deep depression and I admit I was wrong for only caring for the lost i felt and not my partner’s. We argued a lot, he partially blamed me and I accused him of not knowing how it felt to lose a life you were growing inside you.

We were hurting each other and decided to separate for a while, that while turned into a year. We still kept in contact, I went to therapy and worked on healing myself, he even came to a few sessions with me.

We decided to get back together shortly after my 23rd birthday. However the relationship wasn’t the same. He was somewhat withdrawn from me and I thought it was because he still blamed me. I was sick overthinking and worrying. It got to the point where i was going backwards in my process so i decided to snoop through his phone.

I found out during the year we separated he had been confiding in my sister (27) and it turned to something intimate. He cut it off when we got back together but the damage was done. She was pregnant.

Turns out my parents knew about this and some of our friends. I kicked him out and cut off everybody who knew. Well a couple weeks ago I got an invite to the wedding. Something snapped inside of me, I got drunk and I took a cab to my parents house where they were throwing a party for them.

Most of my family was there, I basically showed up and gave a whole f**k you speech to everybody. My sister ran upstairs in tears and my parents called me an a hole for ruining the prospect of their wedding.

I said good because nobody apologized to me, everybody just kept saying we were separated, things happen people fall in love, i should be happy for them, the heart wants what i wants. The worst part is my sister told me maybe my baby died for a reason so she could get her happy ending.

I’m regretting getting drunk now because i’m not a confrontation person but i was so upset. Aita ? Hi everybody, thanks for all the support and encouraging words so far. I know this update is coming so soon but i’ll like to tell you guys a joke.

My sister called from an unknown number a couple minutes after i posted this lol (I’ve blocked everyone). She asked well more demanded that I return the ring fiancé bought since it would be disrespectful to keep anything for him knowing they’re starting a family.

She said how immature of me for basically not sucking it up and being happy for her. She even intended to make me her MoH. I apologized to her for ruining her party and told her I’d mail the ring but as for me and her, we’re done and to tell my parents the same. I’m here balling my eyes out waiting on my therapist to finish with another patient so i don’t turn to a bottle again and go off again.

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

andreaak88 −  I started dating my ex when I was 15 and we broke up when I was 23. If he ended up dating my sister, knocking her up, and then marrying her, I would lose my s**t.

While barging into a party, screaming at them wasn’t exactly the most healthiest decision you can make, personally, I say f**k them. They clearly don’t care about you, and if you got some relief from doing what you did, I say congratulations.. NTA

reverendpartyfetus −  holy s**t NTA. “my sister told me maybe my baby died for a reason so she could get her happy ending.” who the F**K says that to anyone, let alone their sister??

you had a miscarriage which is heartbreaking enough and then your sister swoops in and steals your partner & has the audacity to say something like that? i’m angry FOR you right now. i am so sorry that you’ve had to go through this bs

[Reddit User] −  **NTA. Your own f\*cking sister said maybe your baby died so she could get her happy ending? Oh hell no. I would intentionally wreck their wedding for that sh\*t alone.**

[Reddit User] −  NTA .my sister told me maybe my baby died for a reason so she could get her happy ending. the second your sister said this, it physically became impossible for you to be an a**hole. you could have shown up drunk to the actual wedding and not been an a**hole. the nerve of your sister is absolutely astounding

annikaszczyrbak −  NTA i hope this is real because you’re my hero

GoddessOfMagic −  ESH – We have seen this a lot on this sub recently, but dating/marrying your siblings Ex is weird AF and remarkably insensitive. Your sister, ex, and parents are big AH for doing and being okay with this. And your sister is a MEGA a**hole for the comment about your baby, I am so sorry for your loss.

But getting drunk and storming the castle in a rage was a stupid idea at best. You may feel justified in your behavior, but that doesn’t mean the intention wasn’t to antagonize and traumatize others. To be honest this family sounds like a toxic nightmare.

PolyesterAtrocity −  NTA. Oh my god. The toxicity of your family is unbelievable. I am so sorry that all happened to you. Get away from these people and look after your own mental health.

Please get some professional counseling and work through what has to be some serious emotional stress. You deserve to be happy, so please cut these people out and find your own ‘family’ who will be loving and supportive.. Good luck to you.

Organic_Extension750 −  I’m going with NTA because that’s just messed up. He comes to therapy with you but have s** with your sister and your sister just magically gets pregnant during the short time they’re together and thinks about her happiness when it comes to your miscarriage.

If I were you, I wouldn’t go the wedding and I would cut all contact with the family for a long time. Sending you an invitation for the wedding like that was rude and so thoughtless. You should go back to therapy and get some help to deal with all of that.

ourhonordefendOH −  NTA. For countless reasons they are: ex dating a sibling and not telling you, saying your miscarriage was part of their plan(!), throwing a party before ironing everything out to celebrate with family, etc.

You have every right to be upset and the only reason I would say YTA in any way is going nuclear on the party. That could have been done behind closed doors, but it also seemed they were perfectly content living life pretending you weren’t even there.

Edit: Changing this to NTA from a very minimal ESH after reading others and changing my mind. I think nuclear probably was the way to go. I hope you find peace in your pain and I am so sorry!

[Reddit User] −  Jus this: my sister told me maybe my baby died for a reason so she could get her happy ending. I truly hope you find the healing you need and deserve.

Betrayal cuts deep, especially when it comes from family. Was the Redditor justified in confronting everyone, or did she take it too far? Should she forgive or move on? Share your thoughts below!