AITA for refusing to use the money I inherited from my mother to pay for medical treatment for my half-sister, who has a life threatening sickness? She is the child of my father and the woman he cheated on my mother with.

A Reddit user shared their story of inheriting money from their late mother, who had been deeply hurt by the father’s infidelity. Now, the user’s father is asking them to use the inheritance to pay for medical treatment for the child he had with his mistress, leaving the user torn about their decision. Read the full story below:

‘ AITA for refusing to use the money I inherited from my mother to pay for medical treatment for my half-sister, who has a life threatening sickness? She is the child of my father and the woman he cheated on my mother with.’

When I was 25, we found out that my father had been cheating on my mother for years and he had a 7 year old daughter with his mistress. In one split second, the happy family I knew was gone, and I went through the darkest time in my life. My parents divorced and per their prenup, my mother walked away with most of their assets (since she also contributed more to the family income).

She never forgave my dad for what he did and never talked to him again, though she grudgingly allowed me to have whatever relationship I wanted to have with him. I eventually forgave my dad mostly because I was tired of carrying so much anger and hurt in my heart. I talk to him but I want nothing to do with his mistress or my half sister.

My mother died last year and left me everything – her money, her real estate assets, and her business, which I now own and operate. I am in a relatively comfortable financial position, while my dad is… getting by. He was never a good businessman on his own and lost a lot of his money on businesses that later went belly up.

This year my half sister was diagnosed with a life threatening sickness, and she has been in the hospital for the last four months. The bills are mounting and my dad came to me for help because they are now in a situation where they are finding it difficult to come up with money for my half sister’s treatment.

The thing is, I don’t want to use my mother’s money to pay for the treatment of the child her husband had with his other woman. Though it’s not my half sister’s fault, it feels so unfair when I think that the money my mother worked hard all her life for will go to a child that neither my mother and I have any responsibility towards,

and the very same child of the man and the woman who hurt her so much at that. I’d really rather use it to grow her company and let my dad and my half sister’s mother figure out how to get money for her treatment.

They are her parents after all. The only thing tying me to her is my father saying “She is your sister” and “If she dies because she didn’t get the treatment she needs, would you be able to sleep at night?”. AITA?

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

avocado__dip −  NTA. “If she dies because she didn’t get the treatment she needs, would you be able to sleep at night?” It’s wrong of your dad to lay this guilt on you. His daughter is his burden. While it’s not fair for a little girl to suffer, I don’t blame you for not caring about her wellbeing.

[Reddit User] −  NAH – Blood relations don’t make somebody family. It’s unlucky that your half sister has been put in this position but you’re in no way obliged to help her in any way. Don’t feel guilty about being able to do something and refusing to, you look out for yourself and people you feel close to.

aitathrowawayx −  NAH. I don’t think he’s wrong for asking, but you *certainly* are not wrong for saying no. I would feel just as conflicted about it. Tbh I think the a**hole here is the medical system that puts people in severe debt, just because they’re trying to stay alive.

edit; i can definitely hear the argument for dad being TA for, what appears to be, guilt tripping OP. I didn’t judge him as TA because I honestly cannot imagine what it’s like to have a dangerously ill child,

knowing the other child has the money available to help and chooses not to. I think it’s too complex for me, personally, to definitively call him TA. I hate the medical system for putting these two in this situation in the first place.

jessbelle27 −  NTA and I’m so sorry you’re in this position. It’s shameful your father is putting this burden on your shoulders; I imagine he’s scared for your half sister’s life and desperate to find a life-saving solution. Still very inappropriate and unfair to you, though. What a heavy situation. Have you talked to a therapist?

GeneralWaste_69 −  NTA. Your dad cheated on your mother and now wants to guilt trip you into caring for a child that he helped create? Your dad, the guy who ruined his marriage and pretty much any good relationship with you?

It’s sad for the little girl, but you have no obligation to her, and unfortunately that’s the reality. She’s not someone you know, I assume, or ever had any relationship with.

HanzoSteel −  Good lord, does nobody really see the problem with using an innocent girl’s life as a way to get back at your Father’s mistress? Instead of bending over backwards to get out of helping, just do the right thing man. I’m sure they’re not asking for ALL of your money, but just something to help out.

You didn’t like how your father and his mistress ruined your family? Break the cycle and be the better man. You’re the ass hole and everyone in this thread saying you’re not is also an ass hole. Why do people s**k so much? EDIT: Thanks for the Gold and Silver! And the Platinum!

dstone1985 −  Nta as long as it doesnt interfere with your sister getting medical treatment let them figure out the bills. Millions of parents have to pay their own children’s medical bills with no help

Illectra −  I will go against the grain here and say YTA. As a human being with feelings, don’t you have the instinct to help another human being? Sure, the backstory makes this situation a bit difficult but the child is not at fault for your father’s bad decisions.

What would you do if it was just a random person in need? Wouldn’t you want to help just a little bit? You said you live a comfortable life, yet this child has to think about dying because her parents don’t have enough money.

I think any person, including your mother, would rather help a dying child than a growing company. But maybe this is just a cultural thing as I think it would be my first instinct to help a person and then think about everything else.

girlonabalcony −  NTA. The money was left to *you* by your mother. I doubt she’d want it to be used on the child of the two people that upturned her life. Also, if it’s a life-threatening illness, she could still die even if you did foot the presumably very large bills.

It’s understandable(ish) that your dad would ask but to manipulate you into feeling like whatever happens now to be your fault is SO messed up. It’s sad, but people get sick, and the fact that it costs so much to not die is a problem, but it’s not yours.

centrafrugal −  It’s not an easy one but I’m going to say YTA for literally choosing growing a company over your sister’s life. Pretty much everything repulsive about American society is right there.

Is the user justified in refusing to use their mother’s inheritance for their half-sister’s treatment, or should they set aside the past to help save a life? Share your thoughts below!