AITA for refusing to stop the car for my step sister and refusing to drive her back?’
A man (28M) agreed reluctantly to pick up his step-sister, Jane (29F), during a long car ride to their mom’s house. Throughout the 8-hour journey, Jane caused multiple delays by making excessive stop requests, complaining about feeling sick, and even debating with him and his girlfriend over topics like marriage.
He refused to stop one last time when they were just 30 minutes away, which upset Jane. Upon arrival, she exaggerated the story to their parents, saying he was cruel. Now, after her continued passive-aggressive comments, he has refused to drive her back, leaving her without a ride home.
‘ AITA for refusing to stop the car for my step sister and refusing to drive her back?’
My Mom and Step dad live around 12 hours from me by car, my step sister ‘Jane’ lives around 8 hours away but is enroute if I am driving. On Friday my girlfriend and I finished work at lunch, to drive to my moms to spend the week (my step brother is getting married on Saturday and we are going to work from home for a week).
I begrudgingly agreed to pick up and drive Jane also, I was cautious of doing this as we have never got on and she finds a way to make everything an argument or political debate. Firstly when I arrived to pick her up, she made us wait outside for 30 minutes as she ‘hadn’t finished packing’.
I was annoyed by this alone as it’s a long drive and I wanted to get there before 2am. Hour 1 of the journey (with Jane in the car), she requested to stop to use the restroom. So we stopped. Hour 2 of the journey she requested my girlfriend turned the music COMPLETELY off as she ‘didn’t like music’??
Hour 3 of the journey Jane wanted to stop for some food, I asked her to hold on an hour as I had already planned where we were stopping and getting gas and I wanted to limit stops. Jane then spent the next hour complaining of ‘feeling sick and faint’.
Hour 4, we stopped and Jane disappeared for half an hour and when my girlfriend found her she was just sat outside on FaceTime one of her friends. Hour 5, we stopped because Jane needed to use the restroom. At which point Jane purchased another meal.
Hour 6, I pulled over so Jane could sit shotgun as she was ‘getting car sick’. At which point she wanted to debate why marriage is archaic and exists to limit women. Hour 7, stopped for restroom and more snacks at Janes requests.
Hour 8, we are on the final stretch to my Moms house and Jane requests to stop again. I say no, we are nearly there. Jane then says that she is going to be sick and we have to stop. I refuse, and say I will pull over if she’s going to actually be sick but we are 30 minutes away.
When we arrive at my moms house she announces to my step dad, that I refused to stop the car for her and she’s so ill etc. My mom then shouts at me ‘because I know Jane is sensitive’. Jane is 29, I am 28 so not children.
Since then all weekend Jane has made reference to it and told my girlfriend that I ‘can be cruel and n**ty and has been since a child’. I have now said I am not driving her back, she now has no transport home. AITA?
Here’s how people reacted to the post:
Purple_Kiwi5476 − NTA. Share this summary with your family and say, “it is regrettable that I can’t meet Jane’s sensitivity needs. She needs to find a alternate ride.”
RealbadtheBandit − NTA. She is impossible, deliberately so. It’s amazing to think there are people like this. Your parents will get on your case about not driving her back, so get ready for a fight. But don’t cave.
TBH, when she made you wait at the start of the journey–again, deliberately, to assume power over you–you should have just taken off and left her to figure it out. People like your SS pull these stunts because no one stops them.
Shadowtirs − NTA. Jane sounds like a miserable human being.
sherlocked27 − NTA. Does your family know she pulled these shenanigans? Share this post with them. She’s being rude, inconsiderate and ungrateful.
fancythat012 − NTA. I thought Jane was 5 not 29.
Ok-Profession-9372 − NTA. Jane is cruel and n**ty, not you. She can find her own miserable way back home. The audacity of this woman.
If your mom is concerned about how “sensitive” Jane is, she can drive her.
Ok-Classic8323 − NTA. She has a bloody long walk home now LOL
Sympathy_Main − NTA – “I have now said I am not driving her back, she now has no transport home.” She was possibly one of the worst passengers ever. Not to mention you were doing her a favor. She is free to find her own way home.
BluBeams − NTA. If Jane thinks you’re so “cruel and n**ty”, then she shouldn’t expect you to drive her all the way back home. If mom has an issue with how things went on the ride down there then she can volunteer to drive Jane back home. Jane sounds insufferable.
cakencuffs − NTA – sounds like Jane just volunteered to find her own ride home.
Do you think he’s justified in not driving her back given her behavior, or should he have handled it differently? Was Jane being inconsiderate, or does she deserve some understanding? Share your thoughts in the comments!