AITA for refusing to share my college savings with my step-siblings because my mom saved it for me?

A Reddit user, Sienna (19F), is currently attending college thanks to a savings fund her mother set up specifically for her education. During a family dinner, Sienna’s stepmother casually asked her to share some of her college savings with her younger step-siblings to help with their future college expenses.

While Sienna understood the concern, she refused, stating that the money was meant for her education and that her mother worked hard to save it. This led to tension with her stepmother and father, leaving Sienna questioning if she was wrong for standing firm. Read the full story below…

‘ AITA for refusing to share my college savings with my step-siblings because my mom saved it for me?’

Hi everyone, I’m Sienna (19F), and I’m currently a student. Growing up, I lived mostly with my mom after my parents divorced, but I spent weekends and holidays with my dad, his wife (my stepmom), and their two kids (8F and 6M). While I love my dad, I’ve always felt like an outsider in his new family.

When I was younger, my mom started a college savings fund for me. She worked so hard to build it up over the years, and it’s the reason I’ve been able to go to college without drowning in debt. My dad didn’t contribute much to it—he said he had other expenses, especially with my younger siblings—but I’ve always been grateful for what my mom did.

Last weekend, during a family dinner, my stepmom casually mentioned that my younger siblings are going to need help paying for college someday. Then she turned to me and asked if I’d be willing to “share” some of my college fund with them since “we’re all family.” I was completely caught off guard. I told her I couldn’t because that money is specifically for my education, and my mom worked really hard to save it for me.

She got upset and said I was being selfish, arguing that my siblings are young and will need support when they’re older. My dad chimed in, saying it would mean a lot to the family if I contributed, even just a small portion. I told them I understood their concern but that this wasn’t something I could do. My stepmom ended the conversation by calling me ungrateful and storming out of the room.

Since then, my dad has been distant, and my stepmom barely speaks to me unless it’s to throw a passive-aggressive comment my way. Even my mom thinks I shouldn’t have entertained the conversation at all, but I didn’t want to cause a bigger fight. Now I’m wondering if I handled this the wrong way. AITA for refusing to share my college fund with my step-siblings?

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

FlyHarper −  NTA. That’s your college money. You need to use that for your education. 

Traditional-Trade795 −  NTA – is your stepmom smoking crack? good for standing your ground. you step mom wants your mothers money? craaazy.

TheDarkSide46 −  “She got upset and said I was being selfish, arguing that my siblings are young and will need support when they’re older.” Tell her that’s your job not mine or my mothers to pay for your kids , NTA.

cowandspoon −  NTA. Your step-siblings have no right to a penny of the money your mother saved for you. If your Dad/stepmom can’t handle that, then that is their problem. It’s their job to save for their kids – not yours and not your mother’s. Stand firm, and do not be manipulated or emotionally blackmailed. If the money is in an account that anyone else has access to, move it. If your Dad and family want to die on this hill, let them.

Conscious_Toe_6947 −  Your siblings are still young, as your step-mom pointed out, so your dad and step-mom have enough time to save them some college money!

GemmaGlade −  NTA. It’s your education on the line, and your mom put in the work specifically for you. Families should support each other, but not at the cost of one person’s opportunity. Maybe remind your dad about priorities and respect for each other’s hard work.

Mysterious_Try_4453 −  Tell them “When dad contributes an equal share to the money that MY MOTHER put into my college fund, then I will share. Until then, the money that MY MOTHER, who has no relation to your children, will stay in my college fund”. The entitlement is strong in your stepmother and your father is a parrot, repeating what she says.

Known_Two_2072 −  Lol cool fake story bro like it hasn’t been posted on this sub yet.

lurninandlurkin −  NTA. Your college savings are yours, please do not feel bad for refusing to share it. Your father’s other children are young enough that him and your stepmother have a lot of time to start saving towards their college costs, and this is their responsibility, not yours.

dylancentralperk −  “Yes they will need help when they’re older so you should probably open them an account now like my mother did for me”. Your mother is not responsible for funding her ex husbands future children with another woman through college. The audacity of the stepmother to even ask is astounding!