AITA for refusing to let my stepsister and niece move in with me or live in one of my other properties?

OP’s stepsister, Erica, bullied her for years, mocked her late mother, and even took her college fund when she got pregnant. Despite this, OP worked her way through college and built a stable life with her husband, while her stepfamily never made amends.

Now, OP’s parents, facing financial trouble, demand she and her husband provide Erica with free housing. When she refused, they accused her of being selfish and making a child homeless. OP now questions if she’s wrong for refusing to help someone who never showed her kindness.

‘AITA for refusing to let my stepsister and niece move in with me or live in one of my other properties?’

Expert Opinion:

Entitlement vs. True Family Bonds

Dr. Ramani Durvasula, a psychologist specializing in narcissistic family dynamics, explains that family relationships should be reciprocal—not one-sided demands. When a family only reaches out to take, not give, it’s a sign of emotional manipulation and entitlement.

Why Saying No is Healthy

Licensed therapist Nedra Glover Tawwab emphasizes that setting firm boundaries with toxic family members is not cruel—it’s self-preservation. People who never supported you in your time of need do not get to demand generosity when they’re struggling.

OP’s stepsister took everything from her, yet now expects even more—without an ounce of remorse.

Solutions & How OP Can Move Forward

A Firm No—With No Guilt: OP can refuse to engage with the guilt-tripping, reminding herself that her father and stepmother enabled Erica’s entitlement for years.
Go No Contact if Needed: If her dad and stepmother keep pushing, OP should consider cutting them off to protect her mental health.
Remind Them of Their Own Choices: If they bring up her husband’s generosity toward his sister, OP can respond: “He helps his sister because she has always treated him with love and respect. Erica has never done that for me.”
Let Them Face Their Own Consequences: OP is not responsible for cleaning up the mess they created by handing her college fund to Erica years ago.