AITA for refusing to let my ex’s kid come with us to Disney?

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Being a kind and mature co-parent doesn’t mean being a doormat—especially when it comes to boundaries. OP planned a special Disney trip for her own son, something she had been saving for as a reward for his hard work. But after her son mentioned the trip to his half-brother—the child of OP’s ex-husband and his former affair partner—her ex suddenly expected OP to bring both kids.

When OP refused to pay for another child who isn’t hers, her ex accused her of favoritism and being petty over the past, even pressuring their son to guilt-trip OP into changing her mind. Now, OP wonders if she’s being unreasonable, but is this really her responsibility?

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‘AITA for refusing to let my ex’s kid come with us to Disney?’

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Expert Analysis

This isn’t about fairness—it’s about entitlement.

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OP Has No Obligation to Her Ex’s Affair Child

While blended families can be complicated, OP has no parental responsibility toward her son’s half-brother. She is not his stepmother, legal guardian, or family in any way. Psychologist Dr. Ramani Durvasula explains that in blended families, fairness doesn’t mean equality—it means respecting each household’s boundaries. OP is choosing to do something special for her child, which is completely valid.

The Emotional Manipulation from OP’s Ex

Rather than accepting responsibility, OP’s ex guilt-tripped her by claiming she was favoring her own child—which is completely normal and expected.

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  • His half-brother is not OP’s child—there is no reason for her to financially provide for him.
  • Her ex is the one who created this situation by having an affair and now expects OP to fix it.
  • He even involved their son, attempting to make OP feel guilty instead of stepping up as a father.

This is classic emotional manipulation, shifting blame onto OP instead of taking responsibility for his own child. (Psychology Today)

Why OP’s Decision Is 100% Justified

  1. Disney is expensive, and OP saved up specifically for her son.
  2. Her ex can take his own child if he wants him to go.
  3. OP already allows the half-brother into her home, which is more than many in her position would do.
  4. Setting boundaries isn’t “petty”—it’s necessary for self-respect.

What Should OP Do?

  1. Stand firm and don’t apologize.
  2. Tell her ex that his son’s experiences are his responsibility—not hers.
  3. Have a conversation with her son to explain that while it’s okay to feel bad for his half-brother, it’s not OP’s responsibility to fix his dad’s problems.

Here’s what Redditors had to say:

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OP is not being selfish—she is being reasonable. She saved for a trip for her son, and she is not responsible for her ex-husband’s child. The true unfairness is her ex expecting OP to take on his parental duties while doing nothing himself.

What do you think? Should OP have considered including the half-brother, or is her ex’s entitlement completely out of line? Let us know below!

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