AITA for refusing to keep giving my roommate rides after she said she didn’t want to hang out with me anymore?

A woman (23F) lives with a roommate (23F) who was once a good friend. The roommate doesn’t have a car and has been relying on the woman for rides to work. After the roommate told her she was “tired of us hanging out so much,” she began avoiding the apartment and had an argument with the woman,

accusing her of being a “bad friend” and treating her like a second option. When the woman suggested she stop giving rides to give them both space, the roommate became upset, asking for rides but no social interaction outside of that.

The woman refused and now feels frustrated living with her, especially since the roommate wants to exclude her from social plans. read the original story below…

‘ AITA for refusing to keep giving my roommate rides after she said she didn’t want to hang out with me anymore?’

So, I (23F) live with a roommate who used to be a good friend of mine. We work at the same office, share the same group of friends, and since she doesn’t have a car, she rides with me every day. It’s been like this for a while, and I thought we were pretty close.

Then, out of nowhere, she tells me she’s “tired of us hanging out so much.” Like… what?? She’s literally with me all day, every day, because she needs a ride. If she’s so tired of me, why didn’t she just figure out her own transportation?

Anyway, after a week of awkwardness (and her barely staying at the apartment), she came to me at work and asked if we could talk on the way home. I said sure, thinking maybe she wanted to fix things.

Instead, she unloaded on me, saying I was a “bad friend,” that I treated her like a second option, and other stuff that honestly wasn’t true. I was always there for her! After she finished, I calmly told her that if the problem was us spending too much time together, the best solution was for me to stop giving her rides.

That way, she’d have her space, and we wouldn’t feel suffocated by each other. But oh no, that suggestion made her lose it. She started saying I was “leaving her in the streets” (???) and how I couldn’t do that to her. Like, girl, you have a boyfriend and access to Uber, so what are you even saying?

Then she dropped this gem: “Why don’t you keep giving me rides, BUT don’t talk to me at home or at parties?” She literally wanted me to be her Uber driver while she pretends I don’t exist otherwise. I laughed because it was so ridiculous, and I told her that wasn’t the point of my suggestion.

She then added that she was going to make plans and not invite me anymore. At that point, I was done. Now, we barely talk, which is fine by me because I have no interest in being her friend again. But seeing her every day at the apartment still makes me so angry.

She acts like she was totally justified, and I just feel frustrated every time I see her. I’m moving out as soon as the lease ends, but until then, I’m stuck living with her, and it’s exhausting. So, am I wrong for feeling this way? Or for refusing to keep giving her rides? Would love to hear your thoughts or if anyone’s dealt with something similar.

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

Fluffy-Cupcake12 −  NTA. She wants the perks of your friendship (like free rides) without actually being your friend, and that’s not how life works. If she’s ‘tired of hanging out,’ then she can figure out her own transportation—problem solved.

Her ‘Uber driver but don’t talk to me’ request is honestly laughable. You set a boundary, and she didn’t like it because it inconveniences her. Good on you for standing your ground. She can call her boyfriend or an actual Uber.

pixie-ann −  NTA your friend is contradicting herself. She says she’s tired of you doing everything together but then she’s sick of you treating her like a second option. Makes no sense. Good work on stopping the free transport to work. You’ll be happier once you move out and away from her.

tonyrains80 −  NTA and don’t be exhausted. In the overall scheme of things this is a pimple on an elelphant’s ass. Forget her. She is not worth your time. Every time you ride to work by yourself, laugh out loud thinking that this b**ch is such a total d**bass that she fucked herself out of free rides! Hahaha!

She’s a l**er who doesn’t deserve you as a friend. Don’t let her live rent free in your head. She’ll be out of your life soon. Good luck.

Contribution4afriend −  Jesus…. What a friend, huh? Stop giving rides from now on. Friends or not she is definitely a leech. And a big weirdo too. You are not her mom. You weren’t even charging her money for this. How long will it take for everyone else to notice her selfishness?

Big red flag and at least you can say bye bye forever after this gem. Let’s also add that to HR because you should warn them that you won’t be responsible for her getting late at work and won’t be responsible for her transportation either. Start seeing another place or kick her out depending on what the housing is arranged.

Don’t care if she was having a bad week or was that time of the month, she showed she can’t be trusted at all. Wtf does she think her presence during rides are? Payment? Her presence is so much required? Take the front lead and warn HR and your friends before she makes a fairytale.

NTA and stop being pushed down! No more rides. Not even if she offers cash for gas. She is a terrible person. Not a good friend, roommate or coworker.
And you will stop all the other things you didn’t mention: sharing streaming passwords,

wifi, buying extra meals on the weekends, letting her use your shampoo and soap, borrowing clothes and all those “friends” stuff. She is taking advantage of you. She is a b**ly!

PhoenixPariah −  She’s a user. Kick her to the street and let her temper tantrum her way through real homelessness.

Fibro-Mite −  NTA. New mantra: In five years time this won’t matter. 🎶Let it go. 🎵The girl never bothered me anyway. 😉 In fact, in a year’s time, you should be wondering why you let it bother you.

JTBlakeinNYC −  NTA. Honestly, she sounds like a terrible person. She wants you to be her personal free chauffeur but says she doesn’t like you? I’d move as soon as possible.

[Reddit User] −  I’m petty as all hell and looooove pissing people off when they’ve outworn my generosity . So I would, Loudly offer people rides within her hearing On phone? “Sure I can give you a ride no problem “. “Hey why don’t we take my car, it will be a blast”.

“Let me know if you need someone to pick you up”   “Let me come get you, we can go for dinner it will be fun”  “it will be fun! We’ll load up the trunk and make a day of it”. Etc etc .Just all around obnoxiously joyous behaviour  Because f**k that noise! That’s why!

Have fun with it, besides have you ever noticed how entitled people often suffer with the worst fomo . So give her allll the fomo by having an all around good time, a good time she’s not invited to, plus it gets you out and doing stuff so you see even less of her until the lease is done. NTA she sure sucks though

Cybermagetx −  Nta. She sounds young and dumb. Let her find her own rides from now on.

Neonpinx −  NTA. Your roommate is unhinged and ridiculously entitled. You don’t owe her anything.

Was the woman wrong for refusing to continue giving her roommate rides after the conflict? Was her suggestion unreasonable, or was the roommate’s response out of line? Share your thoughts below!