AITA for refusing to babysit my sister’s kids after she called me “just the fun aunt”?

A Reddit user recently shared a dilemma involving their sister, who seems to take their willingness to babysit her three children for granted. After overhearing a hurtful comment about being “just the fun aunt with no real responsibilities,” the user decided to step back from babysitting duties. Is the user wrong for setting boundaries, or is the sister crossing the line? Read the full story below.

‘ AITA for refusing to babysit my sister’s kids after she called me “just the fun aunt”?’

My (28F) sister (34F) and I have always been close, or so I thought. She has three kids (9F, 6M, 3M) and a husband (36M) who works long hours, so naturally, I’ve stepped in to help when I can. I adore my niece and nephews, and I’ve always tried to be there for them whether it’s hosting sleepovers, taking them on fun outings, or just helping my sister get a break.

But lately, I’ve felt taken for granted. I work a demanding job, and although I don’t have kids myself, my free time is limited. Despite this, I’ve rearranged my schedule countless times to babysit, sometimes at the last minute, because my sister swears she “has no one else.” I never ask for money or anything in return, because, well, family.

Last week, my sister called me in a panic because she had an unexpected work event. She needed someone to watch the kids, and once again, I stepped up. I left work early, canceled dinner plans with my boyfriend, and drove 45 minutes to her house.

When she got home later that night, I overheard her on the phone with her husband. She didn’t realize I was still there, cleaning up the tornado of toys her kids had left behind. She said something along the lines of, “Oh, don’t worry about it. [My Name] will always help; she’s just the fun aunt with no real responsibilities. It’s not like she has anything better to do.”

I froze. I waited for her to hang up, then asked her if she really believed that. She laughed awkwardly and said I was overreacting, insisting she “didn’t mean it like that.” She said she was just stressed and “of course” she appreciated me, but it didn’t feel genuine. I left shortly after and didn’t bring it up again until she texted me a few days later asking if I could babysit the kids this weekend. I responded, “Sorry, I can’t. You’ll have to find someone else.”

She called me immediately, upset, and asked why I was being so “selfish.” I told her I didn’t appreciate being taken for granted or being seen as someone with “no real responsibilities.” She got defensive, saying I was twisting her words and punishing her kids over something she didn’t mean.

Now my parents are involved. They think I’m overreacting and should “forgive and forget,” because “family helps family.” But I’m exhausted. I love my niece and nephews, but I can’t keep dropping everything to help someone who doesn’t value my time. My sister is now furious with me, claiming I’m “abandoning” her kids out of spite. AITA for standing my ground?

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

Melodic_Policy765 −  NTA. If it’s convenient and you want to see the kids, great. If you are tired or have plans, “No” is a complete sentence.

Used_Clock_4627 −  NTA. Time to remind your sister that those are HER kids. And that hiring a babysitter exists. There are apps and the like for that s**t available on the very phone she was talking to her husband on. Also remind her that YOU have a life. Even if you don’t have children. And that if you’re always looking after her crotch goblins, how are you supposed to have a family of your own? Point this out to your parents too. They all need to remember that you are a person too. Not a service.

blueberriNZ −  Hell no. NTA. It’s selfish to expect someone else to drop everything (including impacting on your job, relationship) so she can do what she pleases, so to have the absolute cheek to then make fun of you.. I’d be furious. She chose to have them, she’s responsible for them. If she wants to be away from her kids she can pay a babysitter, and hopefully treat them with more respect than she has you.

Automatic_Worker3213 −  Yntah. She can find someone else to baby sit she just doesnt want to bc ur the fun aunt with no responsiblities, when she ask ur always dropping everything for her kids those r her kids, you do not need to be responsible for her kids she can find anyone, neighbors yalls parents or even a babysitter from a website.

Rattkjakkapong −  Anyone else play ai bingo on here? Family is family / family helps family is allways on my card.

AuubreeAdamss −  You’re not the a**hole. You have every right to stand up for your time and not let her take you for granted. It sounds like you’ve been more than generous, and she needs to understand that.

BlueGreen_1956 −  NTA. I was all ready to chastise you when you said you were upset you were called the “fun aunt.” But when you wrote everything she said, I had to change my vote.