AITA for pouring my boyfriend’s raw milk down the drain because I found out it’s dangerous?

A vegan woman found out that her boyfriend has been drinking raw, unpasteurized milk since they moved in together. Concerned after learning about the risks of harmful bacteria, she poured his raw milk down the drain, believing it was the safest choice.

When her boyfriend came home and found out, he was furious, saying he has consumed raw milk for years without any issues. He felt disrespected and accused her of being controlling. Now, there’s tension between them, and the woman is wondering if she overstepped by throwing it away. Read the original story below…

‘ AITA for pouring my boyfriend’s raw milk down the drain because I found out it’s dangerous?’

So I recently found out that my boyfriend has been buying and drinking raw (unpasteurized) milk. He grew up on a farm and apparently his family always drank it straight from the cow, and he’s been doing the same ever since we moved in together.

At first I didn’t think much of it (being a vegan I never drank it myself) but I started doing some research after I saw the label on it literally says “not for human consumption”. Apparently raw milk can carry harmful bacteria like salmonella, E. coli, and listeria. I freaked out when I read that, I don’t want him to get sick or expose me to something dangerous.

So, when I saw a fresh bottle of raw milk in our fridge yesterday I panicked and poured the entire bottle down the drain. I thought it was the safest thing to do. When my boyfriend got home he immediately noticed and was pissed. He said he spent a lot of money on that milk and that he’s been drinking it for years without a problem.

He accused me of not trusting him and said I had no right to throw away something he enjoys just because I disagree with it. I tried explaining that I was just concerned for his health and ours, but he said I was being a “control freak”. Now he’s barely talking to me and I feel like there’s this huge distance between us.

AITA for pouring out the milk? I thought I was doing the right thing but I’m starting to wonder if I overstepped.

Heres the input from the Reddit crowd:

Honest_Specific6241 −  YTA. You “panicked and poured it down the drain”… What was it going to do to you? You could have left it in the fridge and then told him you had a concern. You should have discussed it like a normal person, instead of reacting to a bottle of milk as if it was about to mug you.

bahahahahahhhaha −  YTA – You can talk to him about your concerns. You can even decide you don’t want to date someone willing to risk their health in the way he’s risking it. But you **can’t** just throw out his property. Apologize and then decide how important this hill is on and whether you feel like dying on it. Only you can decide that.

StAlvis −  YTA. (being a vegan I never drank it myself). So mind your f**king business.

Clear_Moose5782 −  YTA. Don’t ruin other people’s property. You can talk to him about it but what he decides to drink is up to him.

Perimentalpause −  YTA. It’s up to him what he wants to put in his body. Cigarettes. Alcohol. Sugar. Caffeine. And yes, raw milk. As long as he’s not pushing it on you, then it really doesn’t concern you any more than how many chocolate bars he has is. Or jellybeans. Which should also offend your vegan sensibilities.

It’s not your call to make, my dear. It’s also expensive as hell. Why didn’t you have an adult conversation about it and figure out where you both stood? Instead, you overreached and threw away expensive product. It’s his. Not yours. Not that I have raw anything that isn’t sushi, but all raw ingredients come with potential health risks.

That includes vegetables. The thing is, you need to find a good, safe source for it. Brain is outlawed in the US and Canada, but it’s used openly in a lot of places in Europe. A lot of sweetmeats are, and it’s because as long as you’re safe and healthy with the source, it’s not a problem.

The issue with raw ingredients out in the States is that most places are huge places with less emphasis on healthy stock. A small farm is more likely to produce healthy unpasteurized milk and eggs.

Oso_the-Bear −  YTA, control freak! You had no right. You should have talked to him about it but ultimately it’s his decision. Also, here is something he routinely does all the time, and you think you’re going to stop him doing it by destroying one container’s worth? Not logical.

DomesticPlantLover −  YTA. Your research should have told you: it’s not your milk. Not your property. Not your right to destroy it. Any decent research would have revealed that raw milk can be dangerous and can be very safe. YOU can chose not to take that risk. You cannot choose to take away his choice to take that risk.

You have about a 1 in 6 million chance of being hospitalize from raw milk. You have a 1 in 366 chance of being in an automobile accident for every 1k miles driven. You going to take is keys too?

im-gwen-stacy −  YTA big time. Eating raw cookie dough also comes with a plethora of warnings, and people still continue to eat it with no adverse effects. It was not your money that was spent on it, so it was not your place to d**p it out.

If he grew up on a farm and he’s been drinking it for years, I wager he knows much more about it than you, and probably already knew of these associated risks and decided to still drink it. What a weird reaction to have. You could have just talked to him instead of being a p**cho about it

DeathBeforeDecaf4077 −  YTA. Frankly I don’t think you panicked when you saw that milk, I think you went “I know he won’t agree with me when I tell him the risks so I’m going to d**p it before we talk so he can’t drink it if he disagrees.” If that’s the case, he is right that’s controlling behaviour and unacceptable.

If you came home and he’d thrown out a bunch of your vegan food because there were studies linking it to cancer, how angry would you be that he didn’t talk to your first?

Malibu_Cola −  YTA. You had no right to pour his milk out. You owe him a new bottle. You should have voiced your concerns before just pouring it out.

Was it reasonable for her to throw away the raw milk out of concern, or did she cross a boundary by making that decision without consulting her boyfriend? What do you think? Share your thoughts in the comments!