AITA for not telling him dinner is ready?

One Redditor found themselves frustrated with their husband, who has developed an obsession with TikTok. While she was preparing a full roast dinner, she told him it would be ready in 20 minutes and asked him not to take too long.

However, after two hours, he was still upstairs scrolling on his phone, and she decided not to remind him again. By the time he came downstairs, dinner was cold, and he was upset, yelling at her for not telling him it was ready. She wonders if she was wrong for not seeking him out. Read the full story below.

‘ AITA for not telling him dinner is ready?’

My husband has an o**ession with TikTok he’s 40 btw not 14. He takes his phone to the bathroom and will spend ages just mindlessly scrolling. We have 2 young kids and I think he just does it for some peace.

But it means I’m constantly having to go and knock on the door are you ok? Are you going to be long? Will you come and help with the tiny humans? It’s a PITA. I was making a full roast dinner and saw him heading off upstairs. I said it’ll be ready in 20 minutes don’t be long.

Set the table, Finished cooking, plated up got the kids to the table and just thought I’m not going to seek him this is ridiculous. I 100% wanted to see how long it would take him to come out on his own- 2 hours and 10 minutes.

In that time we had finished the meal, I had cleaned the kitchen and the floor, done the dishes and done a load of laundry and the kids were half way through a film. He came down and and yelled at me that I should have told him the meal was ready.

I told him I’m not his mother and it’s not my job to go and seek him. He’s stormed out saying he’s not eating his meal now as roast dinners are rubbish heated in the microwave and this is all my fault and IATA.

Here’s what Redditors had to say:

PushkinMage −  NTA. Are you SURE he’s not 14? Storming out because you didn’t tell him the dinner you made was ready after you told him it would be 20 minutes is something a 14yo would do. A 40yo should apologize for taking so long and thank you for making dinner, feeding his kids and cleaning up. You two need to have a long talk about this.

BraveField −  Thank you all. This has been going on for the last 6-7 weeks, before then he was fully engaged as a spouse and as a father. Now he’s acting like a sullen teenager. We will talk tonight when he comes back from wherever he’s stormed off to try and get to the bottom of what’s going on. The people who said I have 3 kids right now are 100% correct

gleaming-the-cubicle −  NTA. We have 2 young kids. No, you have 2 young kids and one old one. There’s only one adult in this house

ElectricMoccoson −  NTA. Your husband’s behaviour screams social media addiction, specifically TikTok. If he’s not listening to you, ducking out on parental. responsibilities and losing track of 2 hours of time then it may be worth really sitting him down and discussing this.

aquasaurex −  NTA Stop chasing after him to make sure he gets his dinner when it is ready. You told him it would be ready in 20mins he spent 130mins in the bathroom having fun with himself. Good for you for standing up for yourself.

KatEyes1990 −  First 100000% NTA. So, mark me if I didn’t get something.

\-You have 2 kids… that you didn’t make on your own, so they’re HIS too..

\-The cooking is all yours..

\-The cleaning all yours.

\-Childcare (doing all the above) still all yours.

\-I assume he’s not doing house chores either.

\-But you have to feed him… which you do.

\-And you have to be sure he’s fed by chasing him through the house.

\-And you have to control his screen time.

\-Also he doesn’t seem to give a f**k about your feelings or provide emotional support.. ​

So please, can you tell me, besides a second salary to the house (I hope)… WHY IS YOUR LIFE WITH HIM BETTER THAN WITHOUT HIM? Because without at least you would have less chores to do.

naughtywhereipotty −  That dude is jacking off. Tiktok has porn. That dude, is jacking off. NTA, that was inconsiderate of him

VictorianPlatypus −  NTA. He was on a device that tells you the time and comes equipped with an alarm, for goodness sake. This may have been a bit passive-aggressive, but it sounds like you’re understandably at the end of your rope. The two of you need to have a serious discussion about how his o**ession is impacting your family.

Slow_Owl −  NTA you said 20 minutes he chose not to eat with you

Gatorae −  NTA 2.5 hours?! Your husband is not spouse or even a child, but basically a worthless toilet gargoyle. Let him starve.

Was the Redditor in the wrong for not seeking her husband out again after he stayed on his phone for hours? How would you have handled the situation? Share your thoughts below!