AITA for not playing along with my neighbor to help her calm down her child?

A Reddit user shared an awkward elevator encounter where a kind gesture accidentally triggered a child’s tantrum. When asked by the child’s mother to apologize for pressing the elevator button, the user refused, sparking an argument. Was the user wrong for not “playing along,” or was the mother’s request unreasonable? Read the full story below!

‘ AITA for not playing along with my neighbor to help her calm down her child?’

So I get into my building and I’m waiting the elevator when I see a woman and her child – a boy no older than 5 – coming down the hallway. She was carrying some bags and managing the kid, so I – trying to be nice – asked them what floor they were going to and pushed the button for her.

And then all hell broke loose: the boy immediately falls to his knees and starts to scream and cry because he was the one who wanted to push the button to their floor. And I was thinking to myself “why did his mother tell me their floor if she knew that’s his thing?” – it was obvious I was asking for this purpose and not a mere curiosity. And there I was in this tiny elevator watching it all unfold. The mother tried to calm him down all like “don’t cry little one, the lady was just trying to be nice”.

I don’t have kids, and I’m not one to judge parents for how they deal with their children’s silly tantrums in front of strangers, but I also don’t entertain this if I get myself involved somehow. And then the mother said: “look, she’s sorry she pushed the button, aren’t you sorry?” – and she looked at me like waiting I’d apologize to the child.

And I said: No, I’m not, keep me out of this. And then she forgets the crying boy and her priority was to come at me all like ‘what’s wrong with you, can’t you see he’s a child?”. And then we argued back and forth until I got to my floor and left the elevator.

My flatmate thinks I came off as if I was reprimanding the mother when I refused to play along and that’s an AH behavior. I don’t know what to think.

Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:

sweetcharmed −  The mother is actually teaching her child terrible emotional regulation by treating his tantrum as a legitimate response. By expecting a stranger to apologize for a minor disruption, she’s reinforcing victimhood and entitlement.

Children need to learn that the world won’t always bend to their immediate emotional outbursts, and this was a perfect teachable moment about resilience and handling disappointment, which she completely missed..

kharmatika −  NTA this is the funniest s**t I’ve ever seen. “No. Leave me out of it”. King s**t.

sugarycottonspark −  NTA. Parents need to learn that the world doesn’t revolve around their kids’ every single emotional whim. The mom should’ve managed her child’s expectations, not expected a random stranger to fix her parenting problem. LOL at the mom thinking the solution to her kid’s meltdown is getting a stranger to play along. That’s some next-level parenting fail right there. You did nothing wrong.

childishbambina −  NTA. As a parent I would never entertain my child behaving in anyway like this. By the age of 5 children are able to understand how to be polite when things don’t go their way.

Also if it was so routine that her kid has to press the button the mom should have said that when you asked what floor. Clearly this isn’t a habit for the kid and to then ask you to stupidly apologize for pushing the button does nothing to teach the child how interacting with neighbours works.

Totally NTA you were just dealing with a mom who clearly just wanted to get home and put away her shopping when her kid decided to act out so she took it out on you.

Pelagic_One −  I wouldn’t have apologised but I would have said “I would have let you push the button if I knew you wanted to”. Don’t stress too much though, this woman is creating the rod for her own back and you can rest assured she will pay for her attitude.

Miss_Judge_and_Jury −  NTA. The parents should say “you can’t push the button every time”. What on earth is this world coming to. She may have been having a bad day, but I can understand if you don’t have kids you’d be thrown off guard. Totally did not need to involve you or put me on the spot. The last thing I’m going to think to do when trying to go home is apologizing to a small child for pushing an elevator button 😂

LowBalance4404 −  NTA and I love you! That is hilarious. “Sorry, but do not pull me into your reindeer games. I’m just trying to get home!” haha Love it.

OkeyDokey654 −  NTA. There’s absolutely no way your apology was going to calm that kid down.

PipocaComNescau −  NTA. As a mother I would be embarassed if my son made such a scene. It was her job to teach him a lesson. Instead of that she was enabling her kids bad behaviour and shaming you.

Strange-Courage −  NTA. Perfect time for mom to teach the big life lesson of “you can’t always get what you want”. It took my mom’s side eye to never act like that in public even at a very very young age.