AITA for not getting rid of a sentimental plant thats toxic to my girlfriend’s cat?

A man is facing a dilemma after his grandmother passed away, leaving him a peace lily, which is toxic to his girlfriend’s two cats. Despite her requests to sell or divide the plant, he refuses, as it holds sentimental value for him.

He suggested hanging it high and pruning it regularly to keep the cats safe, but his girlfriend calls him selfish for not prioritizing the cats’ safety. read the original story below…

‘ AITA for not getting rid of a sentimental plant thats toxic to my girlfriend’s cat?’

Basically, my grandmother passed away last month and many family members dropped off a lot of flowers. All the flowers were temporary except these peace lilies. I decided to take them home, and come to find out they’re one of the most toxic to cats…

so they’ve been on a 3ft stool in our room and the cats haven’t touched it. My gf lives with me and has 2 cats. She’s asked me before if I would sell it and I said no. Non-negotiable. Then she asked if I would divide the plant in half and give the other half away to family members.

My dilemma with this is that I live 5 hours away from family and I don’t know how I would do that… My suggestion to her, and the only one I’d really want, is to hang it from the 9ft ceiling and constantly prune it. She calls me s**fish and says I’m not listening to her. However I think it’s hurtful to me that she wants me to get rid of a plant that has a lot of value to me.

Edit: ok— I see y’all’s point. Don’t think I don’t care about cats or living animals. I do. I lost my own cat a couple months ago. I think it’s been more so the cloudy judgement around having my first major loss in my life. Never lost a grandparent before, or anybody else in my immediate family.

These are the responses from Reddit users:

BulbasaurRanch −  I don’t understand the great attachment to this plant. It’s not like it was your grandmothers plant – it’s just a standard funeral flower plant. A month ago it was at a florists, or a grocery store. It doesn’t seem like a plant that is good for cat owners. It’s all risk by having it.

It doesn’t really have a connection to your grandmother, it’s just a plant that someone bought because she died. You’re acting like this was your grandmothers plant and has some deep connection to her.. NAH

DaughterOfFishes −  Peace Lilies are not true lilies which are extremely toxic and deadly to cats. That’s not to say peace lilies are ok – they still contain toxins just not the kidney destroying ones of true lilies.

Like another poster, I don’t really understand your attachment to a plant that your grandmother never owned. I understand you’re grieving but you are still keeping a plant, that never belonged to your grandmother, that could cause serious health problems to your girlfriend’s cats. Personally, I’d take my cats and leave.

BTW, if it were a true lily putting it on a stool is laughable. Cats can die from licking their feet (which they do all the time) and ingesting pollen that has fallen to the floor. True lilies should never be in a house with cats. I would also not keep a peace lily with cats, either.

EDIT: After seeing you have mementos from your grandmother, I’m adding a judgement. YTA if you keep this lily in your house. Your girlfriend’s cats are very lucky that this is not a true lily because they would probably be dead by now.

RamseyStreet −  YTA. Some s**tty plant that didn’t even belong to your grandmother is more important than the lives of 2 cats, and the feelings of your girlfriend. Wow. That is shocking. You already have your grandmothers wedding ring, no need for your attitude or nonsense ideas about hanging it from the ceiling

FalseAsphodel −  Dude take the plant into the office and keep it at work. Problem solved, you get a nice plant for your desk/can visit it in the break room and your cats aren’t in danger

Edit: look guys if he doesn’t have an office obviously this won’t work, it’s just a suggestion and we know literally nothing about whether he does or not. It ain’t that deep folks. 🤷

Good_Display_3972 −  Imagine this: one of her cats somehow gets to the plant, eat it and dies. How would you feel? Because it would be on you and i would d**p your ass in a matter of seconds. Tbh, I would d**p you now as well because you clearly dont care about living creatures that live with you. And cats can climb on EVERYTHING.. YTA

Robbes_Watch −  YTA. I’ve never known a cat that couldn’t maneuver into the strangest, most unlikely spots in the house. Maybe hers are different.
Someone here might come up with another workable solution. But if I were your GF, I would move out. It doesn’t sound like she is going to, but I would.

fatboytoz −  YTA its a damn plant. One which is deadly to the animals in the house. Don’t expect this to be a long term relationship, you are showing your colours.

forgeris −  You should think about this – do you care more about the living or the dead. You can have good memory of your grandmother without subjecting your gf cats to toxic plants and risking their lives.

I judge people by their actions and if you don’t care about the living then I doubt that you actually care about the dead and just use this plant as some kind excuse, maybe you hate cats or maybe you are afraid that a physical object will disconnect your heart and mind from your grandmother, which is silly.

She will always be in your heart as long as you live, no need to kill anyone with those memories.

DextaSutra69 −  Throw away the plant.. Hire a therapist. You’ve got issues to work through far bigger than bickering with the gf about a worthless plant.

NoeTellusom −  Gardener here. There are a multitude of ways to keep that plant isolated from the cats. I’d recommend a home terrarium or plant case secured against a cat’s curiosity.

Is it reasonable for him to hold onto a sentimental plant, or should he prioritize his girlfriend’s concerns? What do you think? Share your thoughts below!