AITA for not buying the PS5 that I promised my daughter?

A father promised his 12-year-old daughter a PS5 after learning from her teachers that she was an outstanding student with perfect grades. However, after discovering from the headmaster that she had a behavior score of 72 due to bullying classmates, he retracted the promise.

Instead, he made her write a 1,000-word essay on the harm of bullying and grounded her. Now, his wife believes he overreacted since their daughter has been struggling emotionally after her mom remarried and abandoned contact. Read the original story below…

‘ AITA for not buying the PS5 that I promised my daughter?’

in my country every few months we have to go to school to meet our kids teachers and talk about their grades. this was the first time i was going to meet my daughters(12) teachers because the last times her mom(my ex) was the one doing it. i talked to all her teachers and they all said the same things.

my daughter is amazing and extremely smart and never gets anything other than a perfect 100. one of the teachers even said that she has never had a student as smart as my daughter. imagine how proud i was. so i told my daughter “you know what? you are getting that ps5 you always wanted” and she was so happy.

this was until the headmaster asked to talk to me and informed me that my daughter got a 72 in “behavior” because she has been b**lying her classmates in her free times. i was so mad that i told my daughter to forget about the ps5.

i made her write a 1000 word essay on why she shouldn’t b**ly kids then i grounded her for 2 weeks with no allowance. since then she has been kind of sulking and wont talk to me about her day anymore.

my wife thinks i overreacted because my daughter is going through a lot since her mom basically left her here to get married and wont even call her anymore. she thinks i should buy the ps5 because my daughter still did very well and got perfect grades. im not sure if she deserves it

Here’s what Redditors had to say:

BrilliantEmphasis862 −  My 2 cents, you are dealing w apples and oranges. Apples she did great at school and you are rewarding her for her academics. the Orange is her behavior towards a student. Encourage the academics and punish the behavior. It is a fine line to walk w kids – good luck

Karl-Farbman −  Forget the PlayStation, I’d start asking myself why my kid is b**lying others at school. I think that is the main issue and not who the a**hole is. Figure that out, stop the b**lying and then discuss the PlayStation

I_am_legend-ary −  NTA. But have you set expectations for what she needs to do to earn the PS5. No child is perfect, (or adult) and I would personally say she still earned some form of reward for all.tue good she has done,

You have punished her by grounding her and making her write an essay, at that point I would have given her the PS5 but her keeping is conditional on ongoing good academic and behaviour scores

lostalldoubt86 −  INFO- Along with the punishment, was there a discussion of WHY this b**lying behavior is going on?

2oocents −  INFO: Did you talk to her about the b**lying or go straight to the punishment? Sometimes teachers don’t know the whole story.

KronkLaSworda −  NTA. You’re the parent, not the friend. “my daughter got a 72 in “behavior” because she has been b**lying her classmates in her free times.” You do not reward poor behavior with PS5’s. Yes, her grades are good, but do you want a Batman villain?

This is how you get Batman villains. “Nip it in the bud, Andy” – Barney Fife

Calm_Initial −  Info. What are YOU doing for your daughter to help her through the issues with her mom abandoning her?

je97 −  INFO: Did the head give you any proof of what he was saying? Given this appeared to have been missed by every other teacher I’d be a little suspicious.

Cat_of_the_cannalss −  NTA. But I’ll give you my two cents! you’re right for punishing the b**lying, but that’s not the end of it. Your daughter is a straight a student that suddenly started b**lying her classmates?!? Did you ask the principal when did it start? Could it be that she’s lashing out about her mom leaving?!?

Your wife is right that she’s dealing with a lot. The b**lying definitely has to stop but you also need to help her giving her the tools to deal with her feelings. Otherwise she’ll just find another way to act out. Maybe make a deal with her about getting her behavior better and then give her the PS5. It would be good to take her to therapy too.

One_Faithlessness146 −  Info, so i have a very hard time trusting teachers’ words without doing a little bit of digging. What they consider b**lying is only matched by what they don’t and even just straight up ignore. What exactly was your daughter being accused of doing to other students?

Did you talk to her and ask her side? Does she have a history of this? I am just asking because teachers are getting it wrong all the time, and parents really should be doing the trust but verify when it comes to taking the word of anyone about their kids.

Should he reconsider the PS5? Share your thoughts!