AITA for naming my son the name I had always planned even after my brother and sister in-law “stole” the name?

A Redditor recently shared a situation where their brother and sister-in-law “stole” the name they had always planned for their son, Oisín. The Redditor and their husband, who is Irish, had agreed years ago that their son would carry the name Oisín, a traditional Irish name that holds significant meaning for their family.

However, when their brother and sister-in-law named their son Oisín two months earlier, the Redditor was understandably upset but chose to keep the name for their own child.

Now, their sister-in-law is insisting that they change their son’s name or use his middle name, while the Redditor refuses to back down. Read the full story below for more details on this family drama…

‘ AITA for naming my son the name I had always planned even after my brother and sister in-law “stole” the name?’

My brother and his wife has as much right to name their child whatever they want. I do not own my name. I have no right to dictate to my brother what he names his kid. With that in mind my husband’s has a traditional family name that I love.

Basically since he and I were dating and started discussing our future we agreed that our son would have that name.. Oisín. My husband is Irish. Not in the Boston, my great great great grandfather came over in the 1800s kind of way. In the born in Galway kind of way.

Neither my family or my sister in-law have any other connection to Ireland. She got pregnant right around when I did and her son was born two months before ours. They named my nephew Oisín Miguel.. I did get upset or anything. When my son was born we named him Oisín Daniel. Like I had told her we would be doing.

She has flipped out that two cousins will have the same name. She is nuts because our family is Hispanic and half of our cousins are named Carlos or Camilla. She is trying to insist we call him by his middle name or change his name. I told her to p**s off.

My mom is staying neutral but she was very surprised that my brother gave his son an Irish name he knew I was planning on using. She expected him to name him for our late father.

Anyways my husband’s family thinks the whole thing is hilarious, my family thinks my sister in-law is a weirdo and she thinks I’m an a**hole for copying her. Whatever. I’m posting here and sending her the link so she can see outside opinions.

Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:

Special_Respond7372 −  NTA. She FAFO’d by using the name you wanted, expecting you to have to change yours. I love that you didn’t let it faze you, and named your child as intended.

She’ll continue to flip out, and you can just continue to repeat “You knew what we were going to name our child. You chose to use the same name, so you knew this in advance. Your decision is not my problem.”

hubertburnette −  Your husband’s family is right. So is your family. She doesn’t own the name, and, if she’s going to pretend that Moses had a third tablet saying that people own names.

Then she’s admitting she was completely in the wrong to give her child a name she knew you wanted to use for yours. She sounds childish and petty. NTA, she is.

NotCreativeAtAll16 −  NTA. You’re right, anyone can use a name. That means even after she used a name that meant nothing to her, but so much to you and your hubby, it’s still OK to use that name.

Tell the sis she can p**s off. You didn’t get mad when she took the name you planned on using. My family is similar… We had four John’s, two Rick’s who were cousins around the same age, and most women have some variation of the name Anne.

WannabeI −  Short answer: NTA. Long answer: She thought she was going to own the name by claiming it first, even though her reasoning for the name was that *you* didn’t own it.

So she can either call her son Miguel, or put on her big-girl pants and live with the fact that cousins have the same name. It’s been known to happen.

extinct_diplodocus −  NTA that you didn’t play the role your SIL planned. You were supposed to be really angry and choose a different name for your child. Husband’s family is right: it’s hilarious!.

She’s now stuck her child with a name that has no real meaning for her,, and her attempt at drama has been ignored. Naturally, she’s angry. It’s traditional for the foiled villain to be angry. And no, you didn’t copy her. You simply went ahead with what you had always openly planned. She’s the one who decided to copy.

Rare-Selection2348 −  Sounds like someone in the family likes to manufacture drama.. NTA

revengeofthebiscuit −  NTA – as you’ve said, no one has the rights to a name, but honestly if your SIL knew you were going to do this, it’s \*her\* fault that she chose the same name and chose to get upset about it.

Also if she thinks you’re the first family that’s going to have cousins of the same name, an entire generation of Amandas, Jennifers, Michaels, and Patricks from the late 80s / early 90s has news for her…

Swiss_Miss_77 −  Oisín Miguel. With a Latin last name. Well, it’s not a tragedeigh, cause it at least sound okay together, but that kid was always going to get so much crap if he uses his first name…

Cause he’s NOT IRISH, not even a little bit! They will try with your kid, he will say, “My dad is from Ireland, it’s a family name” and noone will say a thing. But his cousin… they will tear the mickey out of him. NTA. And has your sister in law always been in competition with you?

moew4974 −  NTA.. but since I’m petty I’d like to point out if your brother didn’t think it beyond odd that his wife wanted to name their son after a name from her SIL’s husband’s family? It feels like she’s jealous of OP? Is OP’s marriage, life, and husband just better in her mind?

Would she rather be with her BIL than her own husband? Does she idolize her BIL for his ‘Irishness’? Did she do this because she felt like OP ‘stole her moment’ by being pregnant at the same time? If so, she is beyond an insecure and disrespectful AH.

katbelleinthedark −  Lmao, I’m with your in-laws, this is hilarious. Of course NTA. You’ve been very clear and upfront about the name you chose for your son. And since you come from a family where plenty of cousins share the same name, you aren’t bothered by it.

Which is great! I’m very happy that you got to name your son exactly what you’ve been planning to. SIL thought that you’d cave and pick something else to avoid cousin sameness.

Well boo hoo, too bad for her. If she is so bothered that her son shares a name with yours, SHE can use her kid’s middle name. You keep doing you, OP, and be happy with little Oisín. Miguel will live. xD

Do you think the Redditor was in the right to stick with the name Oisín, or should they have compromised to avoid conflict with their sister-in-law? How would you handle a situation where someone else uses a name you’ve already chosen for your child? Share your thoughts below!