AITA for making a dad joke?

One Reddit user shared a humorous yet heartfelt story about a recent “dad joke” gone wrong. When his 15-year-old stepdaughter, who he legally adopted, claimed he wasn’t her father during a rebellious moment, he responded with a light-hearted “Hi Hungry, I’m not your dad” joke. While his son found it hilarious, his stepdaughter felt embarrassed, and his wife felt the joke went too far. Read the full story below to decide if his response was over the line.

‘ AITA for making a dad joke?’

Note. My step-daughter, Madeline, was about a year old when I married her mother, Jessica. Madeline’s father died before she was born. Madeline is currently 15, and she’s rebelling for almost everything. She did something bad, so while picking her up, I set a punishment up for her. Then she said “You’re not my dad. I don’t have to follow you”.

Honestly, I got a bit hurt from that. But I understand that she didn’t mean it, and that she’d probably change. I just replied “I’m still your legal guardian for the next 3 years, and as long as your in my house, you have to follow my rules.”

That happened about 2 days ago. So our family was going grocery shopping, when Madeline said “I’m hungry. I need food.” I decide to be extremely cheeky and say “Hi Hungry, I’m not your dad.” My son just started to laugh uncontrollably. My daughter was just quiet with embarrassment. And my wife was berating me “Not to stoop down to her level.” I honestly thought it was a funny dad joke. And my son agrees. So AITA?

Mini Update: I did adopt her. So legally I am her parent. I’ll probably give a full update later but here is what happened so far. I go to my daughter’s room after dinner and begin talking with her.

“Hey. I’m really sorry that I hurt you by the words I said. And I am really your dad. I changed your diapers, I met your boyfriend, and I plan on helping you through college. And plus I’m legally your dad, so we’re stuck together. But seriously, I’m going to love you like my daughter even if you don’t think I’m your dad. Then I hugged her. She did start to cry. I assume that’s good.

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

Im_Space −  ESH, but that was one hell of a joke and I congratulate you for it.

IsaRat8989 −  YTA but a small one, it’s a fun joke but wrong audience… Edit: well done recovery.

figgilatopuss −  ESH. But A+ for execution.

[Reddit User] −  I thought it was funny, but I too am an a**hole.

kellybelle_94 −  NTA if it was a one time thing.
Teenagers are a special test of our patience.

RefusedBarf −  NAH it’s a fun dad joke and teens are full of s**t anyways.
Edit: Thanks random internet person for the gold. My first and was a highlight of my day.

Just_a_Soundwave −  NAH. Your daughter is 15, so she’s somewhat of an involuntary a**hole by virtue of being a teenager. What she said was hurtful, but chances are she’ll come around with maturity.
Your dad joke was funny and harmless. I am seriously struggling to find anything negative to glean from it. Even when I was an assholey teen I enjoyed my dad’s cringe-worthy jokes, so this just comes across as very wholesome to me.

Brandelyn1135 −  NTA. She is old enough to know that words have power. While you may have said it in a joking manner, she got to feel a little bit of what you felt when she said you were not her father. That being said, this is an opportunity to sit down with her and let her know that you do love her, very much consider yourself her father, and then let it ride. Teenage girls are hard on their parents in the best of circumstances. Go with God.

bellamuerte117 −  ESH. My dad is not my biological father and when I was a teen I went through similar angst and wanted to lash out. Now I had the good sense to know that saying something like that would be EXTREMELY hurtful so I never did.

But also if my dad ever said something like that, especially in front of my brother who is his biological son I would’ve been heartbroken. I think you need to sit down and have a discussion with her about those kinds of comments, in my opinion if you don’t this is gonna hurt her for a long time.

quoththeraven929 −  Well, biology aside, do you see yourself as her dad? Because I’m betting you do, and the fact that you’d say you aren’t, in public no less, is probably confirming her own adolescent fears. She is probably actually insecure about you not being her “real” dad, and I bet that makes her worry that you won’t always be there for her. She’s a kid and you’re an adult, you have to show her the right way to be and be the role model she needs. YTA. Apologize.