AITA for laughing in my brother and SIL’s faces when they demanded to use my credit card?

When family members blur the lines between support and exploitation, who gets to decide where the line is drawn? A 22-year-old university student faces a heated family conflict after refusing to let her brother and sister-in-law use her credit card—a decision that spiraled into accusations of selfishness and a divided household. This story raises urgent questions about financial boundaries, manipulation, and the pressure to prioritize family over personal responsibility.

‘AITA for laughing in my brother and SIL’s faces when they demanded to use my credit card?’

Expert Opinions:

Financial Boundaries and Family Manipulation
Dr. Henry Cloud, author of Boundaries, stresses that financial autonomy is non-negotiable: “Lending money—or credit—to family members who lack financial discipline is not support; it’s enabling. Saying ‘no’ protects both your future and their accountability.” The writer’s refusal aligns with this principle, even amid emotional blackmail.

The Psychology of Guilt-Tripping
Dr. Ramani Durvasula, a clinical psychologist specializing in toxic relationships, explains in Psychology Today: “Guilt is a common tool in manipulative dynamics. Framing past favors as ‘debts’ to be repaid is a way to exploit empathy. The writer’s laughter was a natural reaction to the absurdity of their entitlement.”

Credit Responsibility and Youth Financial Literacy
A 2023 study in the Journal of Consumer Affairs highlights that young adults who practice disciplined credit use (like the writer) are 60% less likely to face long-term debt. Dr. Emily Roberts, a financial behavior expert, notes: “Her approach—small charges, immediate repayment—is textbook responsible credit-building. Sharing the card would sabotage her progress and expose her to risk.”

Family Systems and Financial Exploitation
Dr. Karyl McBride, author of Will I Ever Be Good Enough?, warns: “In dysfunctional families, financially responsible members are often targeted as ‘resources.’ The mother’s siding with the brother reflects a skewed loyalty that prioritizes the entitled over the accountable.”

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

Redditors overwhelmingly support the writer, calling the brother and SIL’s behavior “predatory” and praising her father for defending her. Many note the irony of the brother’s “free money” claim despite his own debt. Others criticize the mother for enabling manipulation and gaslighting.