Aita for giving all of my coworkers a different reason for why I have missing fingers?

A person (mid-20s) with three missing fingers on their dominant hand started a new job and, fed up with the common but intrusive question about how they lost their fingers, began lying to coworkers with absurd stories. From claiming they chewed them off as a baby to saying a plastic knife was involved, they made up ridiculous explanations for their condition.

However, this sparked tension at work, as coworkers started arguing about the truth, and many feel betrayed. The person is now questioning whether they were wrong for making light of the situation and causing office drama. Read the full story below.

‘ Aita for giving all of my coworkers a different reason for why I have missing fingers?’

I have three fingers missing on my dominant hand. It’s fine. I can type and everything and even manage to tie my shoelaces most days (and on the days I can’t, that’s the dyspraxia). However, I won’t deny that it looks a bit odd to most people. I only have my fourth and fifth fingers so my hand looks a bit like a child’s drawing of a rabbit, and not a good one.

I’m used to people asking about it, usually after staring for a good minute or two, but I still find it annoying. I really don’t get why you’d think it would be an OK thing to ask someone about, but hey. I wasn’t raised in a barn.

Usually I nip the questioning in the bud by just explaining the truth from the get go and assuming that enough people will gossip about it that the message will spread by the end of the day (it always, always does).

Anyway, I started a new job about a month ago, and I honestly could not face going through that same cycle again. I felt like the time had come to not play into it any more and to make something out of it – and I decided to make myself laugh. When the first new coworker asked about it, I completely lied and told her that I chewed them off as a baby.

I then decided to tell the next person who asked that I cut them off with a plastic knife at a picnic, and the next person that I was born with six fingers and they removed too many, and so on. All genuinely ridiculous reasons but I’m a good actor and they actually believed my stupid lies. I didn’t expect them to (a plastic knife… through bone?!) but there you go. Maybe they just thought there’s no way I’d lie about how I lost my fingers.

Within about 3 days, I learned that my coworkers had been arguing about the actual reason and it seems like a lot of them now actively dislike me for lying to them. I’m probably going to have to make some cupcakes over the weekend with my super cool 3D printed adaptive whisk to get back into their good books.

Anyway, I told this story to my brother today and he told me that I was an a**hole because I caused tension within the office on my first day and made people feel stupid for being gullible and believing my lies.

My argument is that I’m not the a**hole because they were asking a rude, albeit common, question and because I didn’t do it with the intention of deceiving them, I was just honestly fed up of the question and didn’t think they’d think I actually severed three fingers with dental floss when I was 3. I’ll accept my judgement, though.

Update: gonna check out here, I think – getting real tired of explaining why it’s not cool to ask people why they lost limbs or digits just because you want to sate your m**bid curiosity. A few reminders for people: I’m not a male (don’t know why everyone assumed that!), don’t ask people about something that could be traumatic, especially when you don’t actually know them, and when making cupcakes, always cream the butter.

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

iLuvTopanga17 −  NAH. This is funny and anyone offended is being way too uptight.

DigitalCode4Life −  Ugh, your co-workers are just so damn rude. NTA. They aren’t supposed to ask you for your fingers at first place let alone “discussing it” and talking behind you. You were embarrassed and pissed off at them asking the same questions and not minding their own business so you joked about it but they were so dumb to recognize it. You aren’t the a**hole. Co-workers are though.

Dead_before_dessert −  NAH, because that’s hilarious and they must be idiots. Your coworkers are f**king rude and it’s none of their business. you *probably* should have waited a little while, before you start blowing smoke up people’s asses. It’s always good to get a handle on your coworkers, and give them a chance to realize they’re being idiots before resorting to snark.

Sidenote: about 10 years ago, give or take, I knew a guy who was born with his fingers fused together. They were amputated when he was just a baby…he was the most amazing guitar hero player I’ve ever seen in my life. He destroyed *everyone*….and took great pleasure in making sure we knew he had crushed us with his “nubs”.. I miss that guy!

Crabtrad −  NTA, I think it’s funny.. ​ But both the “funny” factor and the “a**hole” factor are determined by the stories. I am hoping in some of the tales your fingers were lost to wild animals, terrorists, and/or freak accidents with normal household items

coldtamalee −  NTA – “I chewed them off as a baby.” Hilarious.

micaub −  Put plastic fingers in the cupcakes and say you lost them in a cooking accident.. NTA.

basicallyabotaccount −  NTA, if I was your coworker and I realized you were giving different answers I would be delighted, but not everybody has the same sense of humor.

smrt_fasizmu −  NTA, you made some harmless jokes and your co-workers need to loosen up a bit. Good on you for trying to stay in their good graces as well.

[Reddit User] −  NTA. That is hilarious! But also, I understand that it probably annoys you that people ask but you can’t exactly blame them for it. If I saw someone who was missing a few fingers I would be instantly curious about what happened.

brightwings00 −  NAH. That’s hilarious, and it was very brave of you to lose those fingers protecting the President of Mozambique from an assassination attempt.

Was the poster wrong for lying to avoid a question they found intrusive, or did they take it too far and create unnecessary tension at work? Do you think people should be more mindful of sensitive topics, or should they just accept the curiosity of others? Let us know what you think!