AITA for getting an entire table for myself after my husband and his mom didn’t save me a seat?

A Reddit user shared their frustration about being excluded from a family dinner celebration hosted by their mother-in-law. Despite informing everyone about their arrival time, the Redditor was shocked to find no seat saved for them when they arrived. After being told to either stand or go home, they chose to take an entire table for themselves, causing a scene that left their husband and mother-in-law embarrassed. The Redditor is now questioning if their reaction was too entitled or if their expectations were justified. Read the full story below to find out more.

‘ AITA for getting an entire table for myself after my husband and his mom didn’t save me a seat?’

I’ll start this off by saying that I, f32 have been with my husband Bob, m39 for 3 years, married for one. His mom has a habit of keeping me out of most of their functions with the excuse of “you work too much”. Not true because sometimes I do make myself available but yet find myself excluded.

Last week. His mom invited us for a celebratory dinner at the restaurant after she completed her recovery. I had to with that day but I ket her and everyone know that I’d be there at 8pm. Bob obviously knew I was coming.

Thing is, when I arrived to the restaurant I saw that the table was full. All chairs had been taken and I just stood there with complete puzzlement while Bob and his mom just stared at me. His mom then told me there was no place left for me and that I could either have Bob get up and take his seat or …. go home.

I was so upset but instead of going home I just went and took an entire table for me. Bob and his mom watched with their eyes popping out of their heads like they saw something so shocking… NGL I did get weird looks from the guests but so did Bob and his mom. It was awkward in all honesty.

I had my dinner, dessert, then went home. I saw Bob and his mom staring grudgingly while I was making my way out. He got home an hour later and yelled saying I embarrassed his mom infront of her guests. I yelled asking WTF was I supposed to do after I got denied a seat and he told me that it wasn’t his nor his mom’s fault guests arrived “before” me and took all the available chairs.

I told him he could’ve saved me a chair!!!!!. he said that I could’ve just left instead, and reminded me that I was a “guest” and that I shouldn’t expect this level of entitlement to be “accepted”. He then went on about how I ruined the entire dinner for him and his mom with what I did and has been pouting about it for days now. I don’t get it, I really don’t. was my expectation really that entitled? I mean as his wife he should’ve saved me a seat. But clearly I’m missing something here.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

NanaLeonie −  NTA. Op, is this level of disrespect really what you want for the next 20 years?

Heraonolympia123 −  NTA. 1) they could have booked a table with the appropriate seating. 2) they could have pulled up a chair and budged up if a random extra guest turned up. 3) they could have split the table in to 2. 4) they could have text you before you got there and said “there’s an issue with the table”. Why are you married to someone who would literally sit there staring at you instead of do something to help and then blame the situation on you?

Prudent_Border5060 −  Nta. I don’t understand why you would be with someone who clearly doesn’t view you as family. Him being your husband is pretty bad. Not sure if it’s always been like this. But wow. That’s a horrible way to treat you.

Numerous-Present-478 −  NTA. Mom and husband tried to humiliate you and got pissy when you turned the tables. I hope you do it again.

dontscreamimscared −  NTA!! and i salute you! I could have never done that because i am too much of a chicken, but believe me, if i had been a guest (and grasped the situation) i would have stared too! In admiration!

Zarahemnah −  Has no one explained why there weren’t enough seats for all the invited guests? By their logic, whoever got there last would have to go home since there weren’t enough seats. Do you think any of your mom’s other guests would have been sent home if you got there first? I don’t think so either.

This was intentionally done by your mother in law to humiliate you and your husband was in on it. They were only upset because your actions turned the tables on them and made them look foolish instead of successfully humiliating you. You failed to stay properly under their thumb, so your husband is punishing you a different way. I don’t know what his end game is. I do know controlling, abusive behavior when I see it. Nothing you said even closely resembles a healthy, functional relationship. NTA in this situation obviously.

Quiet-Quiote −  NTA. You’re my sprit animal. I’m super proud of you. Dessert too!

lazy_wonder24 −  NTA I would advise you to rethink this marriage. Your husband is not supportive at all and he will always put his mother first. Don’t doubt yourself, your reaction was great! In what world is it consideted entitled behaviour to assume that you will have a seat at a table you are invited to?

Ok-Cap-204 −  Once she told you to go home and you instead secured your own table, you were no longer her guest. You were and independent customer. And she would not have been embarrassed unless she knew her actions were wrong. It was a power play. Unfortunately, your husband was part of it. Are you sure you can live in this situation for the rest of your life?. NTA

PrestigiousClick2960 −  NTA lol get rid of Bob. He’d probably still be on the t*t if he could be. His mom will always come before you.