AITA for exploding at my bf because he forgets to flush the toilet?

A Redditor shares their frustrations about a recurring issue with their boyfriend: his habit of forgetting to flush the toilet after using it. After repeatedly addressing the problem, the situation boiled over when he forgot twice in one day, leading to an emotional confrontation. Now, they’re questioning whether they overreacted. Read the full story below!

‘ AITA for exploding at my bf because he forgets to flush the toilet?’

So, I (26F) and my bf (26M) have been dating for a couple years. He doesn’t care about cleaning and keeping our place tidy as much as I do. Honestly, I’m pretty much a clean freak which has caused a lot of stress on the both of us when we moved in together.

He also has a habit of spending too much time on his phone while on the toilet (ew) to the point where he will get up and just forget to flush the toilet. It started happening about a year ago about once a week.

It was consistent enough that it became an issue and we had plenty of discussions about it being a problem. I think it’s disgusting and irresponsible for an adult to expect someone else to be ok flushing the toilet for them.

Today, he forgot to flush the toilet TWICE and I just exploded. I told him that I found it disgusting and that I’m absolutely tired of him doing that. I also told him that it truly makes me question whether we should be together when we have such different standards when it comes to cleaning and hygiene. AITA?

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

Logical-Fox5409 −  Speaking from experience, run and run now. When I married, we were both living at home with parents. Once we moved i. Together, he would drop his dirty clothes anywhere and expect me to pick them up and wash them. I asked, i begged for him to just put them in the wash basket. He refused, until the week I only washed clothes from the basket and he had nothing to wear to work.

I should have seen the disrespect and red flags then and run. But I didn’t he got lazier and lazier. It was disgusting and degrading. I finally left him and divorced him, he still can’t clean the toilet when he makes a mess.

Every time he starts dating , they see his house the first time and he makes excuses that he has been sick and the adult kids made a mess and won’t clean. Then they come over the second time, realise his house is always a p** sty and ghost him.

cressidacole −  If he forgets to flush, I’ll bet he doesn’t wash his hands either. Those hands that play with his phone. And you. Put a sign on the back of the toilet door that says “Flush m**herfucker, flush.”

Tessa_Kamoda −  NTA.. ewww, just ewww. at first it is ‘just once a week’, then it becomes every day, the skid marks in his undies, the socks not meeting the hamper, the nail clippings flying through the room,… \*barf\*

it is not the fact that he is… ”forgetfull”… it is the fact that he does not care. since he has you to ”flush down” his slack. soooo, what will be next on his list-to-forget, hmm?

*(but guess what, i so wanna be a fly on the wall when he discovers your used tampon or pad you were not able to throw away because the cramps got to you and all you could think was how to get the fastest back into your bed. THAT could be epic.)*

kassiartt −  NTA. No one just forgets to flush the toilet, especially after having the same conversation over it multiple times. He is being inconsiderate and you are absolutely in the right to question your relationships future if it really is that big of a deal to you- don’t feel bad if it is we all have our limits.

Rep_girlie −  NTA. Once or twice is an accident. More than that is just insanity.

1. He should be closing the lid before flushing the toilet (we all should, to keep the germs in). Close + flush.

2. He’s going to end up with a whole host of problems with his ass if he keeps doing sitting on the toilet for an hour. Seriously, look it up.

When one of my male friends leaves the seat up, I don’t put it down. I yell to them to come back into the bathroom and put this damn seat down. After one or two times, they no longer forget to put it down. I suggest the same for your bf. Even if he’s asleep, I’d wake him up to flush. Orrrrrr maybe bail on the relationship because basic hygiene matters.

rileysauntie −  NTA. I would ABSOLUTELY be inclined to start treating him like the child he’s behaving like and implement a sticker chart where he gets an ice cream when he flushes 10 times without needing a reminder. Shame him into doing it.

Maybe his mum or buddy comes over and sees his “Johnny needs a little help remembering to flush when he potties” chart and I bet that jogs his memory in the future. Or maybe this is why I’m single and you don’t want to listen to my petty ass. Now I’m wondering if he washes his hands. And I’m grossed out for you because I’m sure I already know the answer.

justyules −  Lady I’m begging you to have some self respect. How you could possibly have so little esteem for yourself to bring yourself to s** a man who consistently shows you his poo is baffling. This isn’t okay 😭

Grenflik −  NTA! WTF!? Does he forget to wipe his ass and wash his hands?? Does he just do his business and leave the bathroom??

EmceeSuzy −  If he hasn’t suffered a significant brain injury, you need to leave.

nexxwav −  Nah your bf n**ty af 

Was the Redditor justified in expressing their frustrations, or did they overreact to a minor issue? How would you handle differing hygiene habits in a relationship? Share your thoughts and advice below!