AITA for DEMANDING my SIL replace the expensive fabric she and her children DESTROYED with EQUAL fabric?

A Redditor is furious after her sister-in-law (SIL) and her children ruined a precious piece of fabric that the Redditor had specifically bought for herself. The fabric, which was discontinued and cost $25 per yard, was intended for a special project, but SIL took it from the fabric closet and let her kids use it as a tablecloth for Christmas ornament crafts.

When the fabric got ruined with paint, the Redditor demanded that SIL replace it with 6 yards of equivalent quality fabric. SIL responded by giving her a much cheaper, lower-quality fabric, which led to a heated argument. The Redditor now wonders if she’s being unreasonable for not accepting the replacement. Read the full story below.

‘ AITA for DEMANDING my SIL replace the expensive fabric she and her children DESTROYED with EQUAL fabric?’

I am STEAMING mad about this and everyone around me is pretending like I’m being a cunt. I’ll let you people decide. First, I sew my own clothes. My husband and I live in a very nice house with a HUGE room filled with gorgeous sunlight for my hobbies.

We hosted Thanksgiving. My SIL and her three kids were staying with us, despite that she always treats me like s**t for preferring pets over kids. On Tuesday, as I went to do some last-minute shopping, my SIL texted about a tablecloth for her kids to put down while they did Christmas ornaments. I walked her through the closet with the VERY. CLEARLY. MARKED. TABLECLOTHS.

I got home 3 hours later and checked in on everyone. When I went into the hobby room where everyone was gathered, I saw it. SHE PULLED MY F**KING ATELIER BRUNETTE FABRIC FROM THE CLOSET. MARKED. FABRIC. This particular style was discontinued several years ago, but I snagged for $25/yard. I had 6 yards. Let me note that fabric is EXPENSIVE and I have always sourced from thrift stores, deep clearance, etc. This was a GIFT to myself.

I f**king screamed “What the hell are you doing?!” and ran to the table. She looked alarmed and acted like she had no idea what she’d done. Her f**king kids spilled all kinds of paint all over the fabric. I told everyone to STOP, put DOWN the crafts, and get OUT.

After I f**king cried over that fabric and tried my best to salvage it, I demanded she replace it, and said how. She argued that she had no way of knowing that “ugly ass” fabric was for something other than a tablecloth, because it didn’t look like anything anyone would ever wear seriously. I said I expected 6 yards.

Black Friday she and the girls handed me a JoAnn Fabric bag. They handed me 6 yards of an absolutely h**eous Keepsake Calico fabric. Typically $9.99/yard but on sale for $3.99 this weekend.

I asked her if she was being serious, and she said yes, here’s 6 yards of ugly ass fabric. I deadpanned “Get the f**k out of my house. Now.” and she got very angry and started arguing with me that it’s not her fault that I have expensive taste. I told her to leave, now, and not to come back unless she has EQUAL. QUALITY. FABRIC.

Of course I’m being told what an awful, evil person I am because I wouldn’t “graciously” accept her insult of s**t quality quilting cotton. For those who don’t know fabric, this was like presenting someone with a 2001 Honda Civic after crashing their 2020 Maserati.. AITA?

**EDITED AT THE REQUEST OF A POSTER:** To be very clear, SIL had to go *far* out of her way from where I directed her to grab the fabric. It was not even kept in the same room, let alone closet, as the tablecloths which were CLEARLY marked. There was no reason for her to be IN the fabric closet.

The was not an “honest mistake” by ANY stretch of the phrase. When we were on the phone, I directed her SPECIFICALLY to the linen closet. She had to DELIBERATELY go OUT OF HER WAY to grab the fabric.

**SECOND EDIT:** The linen closet is next to one of the bathrooms, where I directed her. Each shelf is labeled with what they’re for, towels, guest towels, bed, guest bed, etc. I said “You see the shelf marked tablecloths?

There’s one with paint on it. You can use that.” The fabric closet is in the master bedroom (NOT the craft room even), and each larger cut of fabric is kept inside of a plastic tub, often times in a vacuuum sealed bag, labeled with the yardage, manufacturer, and fiber content.

**THIRD EDIT:** Several people seem to have a personal issue with my writing style, use of caps, explanation of my large hobby room, etc! These aren’t part of the issue, but seem to really upset some of you.

I find that very interesting and wonder if it would be the same if it was a man describing his video game dungeon and battle station! I take a lot of pride in coming from a working class background and having a room dedicated to my hobbies. I hope you all get to enjoy a space of your own eventually as well. <3

See what others had to share with OP:

zookinis −  NTA and please ignore the people telling you that’s you’re overreacting or seem crazy. If this post was about someone destroying someone’s video games or other nerd crap there would be no question. Destroying your personal belongings is NEVER excusable under ANY circumstances.

sukinsyn −  NTA. Balenciaga makes some ugly ass s**t. Just because something is “ugly” doesn’t mean it’s cheap. So let me make sure I understand: she destroyed $150 worth of fabric (maybe more if it’s been discontinued) and tried to replace it with $24? Okay, as long as she has included a $126 gift card to JoAnn Fabrics. Otherwise she is for sure TA.

Mom-MomZilla −  NTA you texted her the location of the tablecloths so she had no right going through your home to the area where you have your fabric stored. It was an absolute intentional i**asion of property to take an item from a cabinet clearly marked “fabric” and pretend it was innocently mistaken as a tablecloth. The replacement fabric was just another slap in the face.

lushae −  NTA – she went out of her way to get that fabric. Or it was a mistake. But there’s a difference between a cut of fabric 18 ft long, and a tablecloth which would probably be 5ft – 6ft. And even if this was a mistake – as soon as I realised my mistake, and your upset I would have apologised and apologised! The fact she didn’t handle it like that is horrid

yori07 −  NTA. Everyone else has said their piece about replacement, so I’ll say this: Check and make sure that all of your valuables, jewelry, important papers, etc. are all accounted for. Your SIL was so far out of place that she had no reason to be looking around in your bedroom *unless* she was looking for something else first.

It certainly doesn’t take an aerospace engineer to realize that most people don’t keep tablecloths in their **bedroom** closet. At best, your SIL was being a snooping a**hole. At worst, well…

EstherandThyme −  Y-T-A for keeping your valuables in an entirely separate and private part of your house OP. Maybe if you don’t want to be held responsible for other people stealing and breaking your belongings, you should purchase a storage unit in a neighboring state. /s

Seriously? NTA. If this story were about a graphics card, everyone would be on your side. Some of the people in this thread need to get out of their moms’ basements for once.

ughnamesarehard −  NTA. It doesn’t matter what the object was worth, how expensive, how much of an accident it was. Someone ruins something of yours they are obligated to repay the cost of the item in full. It doesn’t matter that she doesn’t know, it doesn’t matter what she thinks. This is her fault for not paying attention to the labeling.

If someone destroyed my $2k graphics tablet I would not accept a $100 replacement. I would expect the exact brand and model or cash for however much that exact brand and model is running.

Obese_Rabbit −  NTA It’s not money you lost it’s time you spent looking through specialty shops to find this. You can’t just hop on amazon and order a new “Action Comics #1” nor can you do that with this. You went from 0 to 60 pretty quick, but they wasted your fancy s**t when you told them what to use.

Asking for a replacement isn’t out of line. You protected your nice things as well as anyone could expect and the argument “I didn’t understand it’s value” doesn’t hold any water either.

I don’t know s**t about wine but if I’m asking for a bottle to cook with, and you point me to one, and I pick a different one from a different room all together, yea I’m the a**hole.

Tolaly −  Honestly ESH solely because you all sound exhausting af

hapaonthemainland −  NTA , she stopped all over your boundaries in such a crappy passive aggressive way. So sorry. I too love to find treasures for a discount so I can have my champagne taste on my beer budget and they are rarely replaceable. She went out of her way to use something she wasn’t supposed to just because she’s mean. You might have a lot of stories for r/justnofamily. You did exactly what I would’ve done.

Do you think the Redditor is justified in demanding a replacement of the exact fabric, or should she have accepted the apology with the cheaper option? How would you have handled the situation if you were in her shoes? Let us know your thoughts below!