AITA for deciding not to go on a trip after learning my sisters boyfriend would be joining us?

A Reddit user shared their frustration after agreeing to a family trip with their mom and sister, only to find out afterward that their sister’s boyfriend would be joining and that the trip’s dynamic would change. Feeling misled and questioning the purpose of the trip, they wonder if canceling would make them the bad guy. Read the full story below.

‘ AITA for deciding not to go on a trip after learning my sisters boyfriend would be joining us?’

Long story short, my mom and sister have been planning a trip for a while, and they’ve been begging me to go, saying they’d have more fun with me there and would feel safer having me along.

I’ve said no multiple times because I really didn’t want to go, but when my sister asked one last time, I finally agreed and bought my ticket. Right after that, she mentioned that her boyfriend is also going and that she’s planning to extend her trip a few more days without me and my mom.

The whole reason I agreed to go was to watch over them and enjoy a family trip together. If I had known her boyfriend was going, I wouldn’t have agreed. Now I feel like she played me, and I’m really annoyed. Would I be the a**hole if I canceled?

Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:

Nester1953 −  It’s fine if you cancel. I have no idea if you were played — although, if the BF was invited from early on, the suggestion that you would make mom and sis safer does seem a bit dishonest and m**ipulative. (And now sis and BF can go off on their own whenever because you can keep mom company.)

But bottom line, you thought you were invited on an all-family trip with the three of you but it turns out it’s something else that you didn’t know about when you agreed to go.. Feel free to drop out.. NTA

Scarygirlieuk1 −  NTA. You were invited so you Mum wouldn’t be a 3rd wheel on your sister’s and her boyfriend’s holiday, they need you to keep her entertained, your Mum now has someone to travel home with while your sister can continue having fun without feeling guilty that she abandoned her. Save your money and go on a holiday you’ll actually enjoy

diminishingpatience −  NTA. If I had known her boyfriend was going, I wouldn’t have agreed.. She probably knew that.

PurpleRose5679 −  NTA if you don’t want to go doesn’t matter the reason you don’t have to. just say work or something came up if they ask.

Dark_Lilith_86 −  NTA. She wanted someone to entertain your mom while she goes off with the bf. Cancel and save your money. That’s childish behavior telling you after the fact.

Muux_ −  NTA. You’re completely within your right to decide where you want to be and who you want to be surrounded by

Squibit314 −  NTA. She didn’t want mom to be a third wheel. She wanted to sneak off with the bf but felt guilty at the thought of being alone. Cancel. If there’s an airline ticket involved, contact the airline. It may not be refundable but that doesn’t mean you can’t change it.

It used to be that you had up to a year to use a ticket you canceled. You’d have to pay the difference between the old and new ticket plus a change fee. Work with the airline. When you call be super nice. Agents are yelled at a lot.

Acceptable-Law9406 −  NTA, you agreed to the trip under a certain dynamic, and the dynamic changed. Be sure to learn from this and always stand your ground in the future when it comes to your family, as they seem to be rather persistent.

OCessPool −  NTA. They don’t need you to watch over them. Cancel your ticket, and only tell them at the last minute.

sandpaper_fig −  If you’re female, just state that you agreed to a girls’ trip. Since it’s no longer a girls’ trip, you’re cancelling. If you’re male, just say you thought the trip was immediate family only.

However that could be tricky as your sister could argue that he is family. However, if she’s not engaged or living with him, I don’t consider him family.. NTA

Do you think the user is justified in canceling the trip after feeling misled, or should they follow through for the sake of their family? How would you handle a situation where plans change unexpectedly? Share your thoughts below!