AITA for considering ending my not terrible marriage because being a stepfamily just isn’t working?

Blending families can be one of the most challenging aspects of marriage, and sometimes unresolved conflicts can push even a “not terrible” marriage to the brink. In this update, a 36-year-old stepmother describes how her relationship with her stepdaughter has deteriorated since her pregnancy, to the point where she’s considering ending her marriage.
Despite deep love for her husband, the ongoing hostility from her stepdaughter has turned their home into an emotionally unstable environment. Now she wonders if seeking a healthier living situation might be the best choice for everyone involved.
‘AITA for considering ending my not terrible marriage because being a stepfamily just isn’t working?’
Family dynamics in stepfamilies are notoriously complex, and when a child’s adjustment to a new family member turns into prolonged hostility, the entire household can suffer. Dr. Laura Markham, a psychologist specializing in blended families, notes, “Stepparent relationships often require time, patience, and consistent support; however, if the environment becomes toxic and the child’s behavior shows no sign of improvement despite professional help, it can deeply affect the emotional well-being of all involved.”
In this case, the stepdaughter’s refusal to accept her new sibling and her persistent aggression—even after family therapy—has significantly strained the marriage. While the husband has tried to mediate, the stepmother is understandably exhausted by the constant conflict. Experts emphasize that every family member deserves a stable, loving environment. Sometimes, reevaluating living arrangements or even a marital separation might be necessary if the ongoing discord undermines everyone’s mental health.
Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:
Many redditors sympathize with the stepmother, arguing that if repeated attempts at reconciliation and therapy have failed, seeking a healthier home environment isn’t selfish—it’s necessary for long-term well-being. Others suggest that more time or alternative therapy options might still be worth trying, emphasizing the importance of supporting the stepdaughter through her pain. The discussion reflects a wide range of opinions on whether it’s fair to consider ending a marriage solely due to a challenging stepfamily dynamic.
Send the 13 yr old to boarding school