AITA for cancelling someone’s return pickups?

A woman (35F) discovers her husband’s friends have been sharing his employee discount app login with others. A stranger mistakenly used her address and contact info for orders and initiated return pickups without consulting her.

This caused disruptions during her baby’s naps and work meetings, as deliveries and pickups often happened in the afternoon, triggering her dog to bark. Frustrated, she canceled the return pickups, preventing the person from receiving a refund, and plans to refuse a pending delivery.

Her husband feels she’s overreacting after the stranger’s connection apologized, but she believes the situation has been unfairly disruptive. read the original story below…

‘ AITA for cancelling someone’s return pickups?’

My husband (35M) works for a popular clothing company that has a shopping app. He gets employee discounts on purchases via to app. Now he has given his login credentials to a few of his close friends to take advantage of his employee discounts which is of no issue to me.

However, these friends have gone ahead and shared the login credentials with their own friends and families who use the app constantly and have on many occasions used up the discounts (there is a limit on the amount of discounts you can utilise per quarter or so).

Now comes the issue – some random person whom I do not know has gone ahead and placed orders for himself but has chosen my address and contact by mistake (it was listed as one of the addresses on the app but I have now deleted it).

This said person did not contact either me or my husband to apologise for the mistake and neither have they cancelled the orders in time before they were packed. This app is a real pain because all orders are shipped separately and you receive a security password via SMS that you have to give to the delivery agent even if you are returning the package.

A little background about my situation – I work from home and have a baby who naps in the afternoons and I also have a dog… can you see where I’m going here? It’s a hassle every-time the door rings coz my dogs goes ballistic barking and the baby wakes up.

The parcels for this app are almost exclusively delivered in the afternoons. In order to ensure my baby is not woken up, I have to ensure that when I know the delivery agent has entered my housing colony, i lock my dog up in a bedroom and wait by the door so he doesn’t ring the doorbell.

I also often times have meetings during this time of day. I personally have stopped ordering from this site because of this issue. I’m really miffed that the person who placed the order did not have the courtesy to give us a heads up about the mistake or to apologise.

He has also gone ahead and raised requests for the packages to be picked up without requesting us! This would again incur the whole song and dance of me locking up my dog and waiting by the door during the work day which would total 6 times coz it’s 3 separate packages (2 of which have been delivered already and were due to be picked up)

and one on the way. I hence went ahead and cancelled the return pickups. This will lead to the person not getting their amounts refunded. I have decided to refuse the third and final packGe for which he will get his money back.

My husband says I’m an AH because his friend has now reached out to him saying it was his brother (from another town) who mistakenly placed the orders, and that I should not create such a fuss about the matter. Am I the AH here?

Here’s what Redditors had to say:

edebby −  NTA. This probably won’t be a popular opinion, but your husband should be way more considerate. First, you don’t get to use this discount yourself because your husband is committing a fraud.

Second, you need to accept all those orders which ruin your day (oh yes, I call a day where a baby becomes cranky because he didn’t sleep well a ruined day).

You are not a shipping hub, and if the people who steal from this company by using an employees credentials doesn’t know how to use the app, well, tough luck. you were given a gift, try to use it better next time

Dragon_Fire_Skye −  NTA but your husband is by (1) giving his login credentials to other people — and they’re TA for passing those credentials on to even more people and (2) for not having your back when you’re the one whose work and home life is being interrupted by these random deliveries.

Your husband should change his password immediately and not give it to anyone except you.

Aggressive_Cattle320 −  NTA. Your husband’s decision to give this personal discount info to other people is taking advantage of the companies intentions. Those discounts are supposed to be for the employee and his own family unit, not for every person he knows.

His job could even be in jeopardy if they find out his friends are abusing this discount meant only for him. Draw your boundaries on this one and tell him this has to stop now. It’s affecting your home schedules and life and that is not acceptable to you.

His family should come first, not his buddies and their buddies. He should change his login info and secure the account and app again, then tell them the party is over. You give people an inch, they will take a mile is the saying that applies here.

Cheddarbaybiskits −  NTA, and your husband may be risking his employment by sharing his discount, not to mention being inconsiderate to you.

jeremyism_ab −  Nta but your husband may be fired for abusing the privilege he’s been given. His login in credentials are spreading on their own. How long before this becomes an issue? How long before some entitled dipshit contacts the company because the quarterly limit was reached, but they still want a discount? That was a stupid thing for him to do.

warclonex −  INFO: at any point have you raised all those ‘concens/reasons’ you listed to your husband before all of this?

VeilPulse −  NTA, your husband’s friends are abusing the discount and disrupting your life.

AnonAnontheAnony −  NTA – And I would go as far as to say this sounds like a Mail Fraud scheme the way you describe it.

First_Effect_5179 −  Fraudulently using credentials

Aure3222 −  NTA Your husband and especially your husbands friends are being way too permissive here not only is this particular situation inconveniencing you but its dangerous, it would be very easy in a set up like this for someone to steal and use your husband’s payment information.

Yeah maybe its a little mean to not give the friends brother a chance to get his money back on the first two packages but ultimately its on him for not reaching out immediately after the mistake was made and trying to arrange a solution.

Managing boundaries or being too harsh? Should she have handled the mistake more leniently, or was her frustration justified? what do you think? share your thoughts below!