AITA for cancelling on an international trip because my friends added extra people to the travel group?

A 26-year-old planned an international trip with three close friends but decided to back out after learning they invited three additional people—strangers to them—who would join for the entire trip. Initially envisioned as a small group of four,

the expanded group dynamic felt overwhelming, especially with logistical challenges and unfamiliar travelers involved. Despite assurances from their friends that it would be fine, they chose to cancel their plane ticket, prioritizing comfort over potential drama. read the original story below…

‘ AITA for cancelling on an international trip because my friends added extra people to the travel group?’

So I was planning a trip to Japan and South Korea next May with three good friends that I had known since high school (we are all 26). I had bought the flight tickets already as did my friends and we were in planning mode.

One friend said one friend would be joining us for a few activities (who I don’t know) because he would be in japan around the same time. Ok cool, he has his own itinerary so I wasn’t too worried about that.

Then yesterday I learn that three other friends of two of my friends are suddenly being added because they wanted to come along, they are buying their plane tickets soon, and they will be with us the whole time. I know none of these people. And I literally had thought it would just be 4 of us.

I got really annoyed by this and told them that it will be challenging to travel as a group of 7 (and sometimes 8 with the other guy) and I frankly do not feel very comfortable travelling with 3 strangers to a faraway country and sharing rooms.

They said it won’t be a problem, they’re very chill and we can even book different rooms and I can share with the friends that I know. I still didn’t feel comfortable. I don’t know them. I don’t know how they travel. I don’t know if they are problematic to travel with.

And it is kind of a logistical nightmare to plan a trip consisting of 7-8 people. The group call we had yesterday to plan was incredibly annoying because there were soo many people putting in their two cents and opinions and at that point I had had enough.

Today I got a refund for my plane ticket and told them that respectfully, I would be bowing out of this trip but I hope they have fun. My friends got really surprised and also upset. I just don’t want to spend thousands of dollars on a trip that will be either a headache or potentially filled with drama. AITA?

These are the responses from Reddit users:

frauleinsteve −  NTA. Trust your instincts. continue saving up your money and have another trip down the road….hopefully one that is fabulous and amazing.

leidomi −  NTA It’s quite rude to just add people to a trip without asking and checking that everyone in the original plan is ok with it first. You’re perfectly valid for not feeling comfortable to travel with strangers.

Strange_Jackfruit_89 −  NTA. I’m not a big fan of group trips anyway. I’d absolutely not be okay with that many extra people being added. Especially without the consent of the original group. What if these people are a pain to travel with? They could be big complainers, messy, unhygienic or etc.

Not to mention what if they wanted to do different activities than what you already had planned? Is everyone going to do their own thing? Too much instability there. I did a “group” trip once and it was horrible. The group wanted to stay together the entire time but bc of that, we didn’t actually due much.

Because others didn’t want to walk too much or wait in line, etc. so basically I paid for a trip where I didn’t do anything bc of everyone else. In hindsight, I should have just gone and done my own thing, but I was a lot younger and didn’t want to argue.

Opposite_Jeweler_953 −  I’ve traveled with my family, 7 adults and 2 kids. Everything is more difficult. Take dinner reservations… just agreeing on a place is difficult, then getting a big table. With so many people you don’t know it could be a disaster. Good call OP, definitely not the AH.

Wise_woman_1 −  NTA. You expressed your discomfort and it was dismissed. Traveling with others is a challenge while it may have been fine, with people going their own ways for meals and tours, then meeting up here and there,

if you have 7 people trying to agree on a time and place for a meal or someone is going to be upset because you really have your heart set on seeing one place and don’t get to because of unexpected delays caused by others it sucks.

Maybe look at solo tours. I have planned several of my trips a la carte, with guided tours for my first day and free time for the rest of the time.

BetAlternative8397 −  NTA. You did the right thing. It’s disrespectful on their part.

SpecialistAfter511 −  NTA right call, just eating out will be a pain. Too many opinions.

PalpitationTricky204 −  I had a large group of traveling friends and it did not work out, the smaller the group the better,

EternalGuardian84 −  NTA. Had something similar happen with a trip to WDW. What was supposed to be 5 turned into 9 suddenly and NGL, I was over it. I ended up switching hotels to get away from the main group and just did my own thing the last 4 days out of 7 we were there, and left earlier than them.

So I didn’t need to deal with them at the airport. The additional people were people I’d never met, were wildly different in their ideas of what a vacation was. I am very laid back and just go with the flow.

The 4 new people wanted to plan things minute to minute, could not understand why I wanted to get to sleep before midnight and how I wasn’t okay with them keeping the lights on in the room past 2am. Was so happy to be away from them and actually really did just doing stuff at a slow pace. Never will travel with any of them ever again.

igramigru101 −  Nta. Plain and simple, 4 of you made a plan. They changed it without consulting with you. You don’t like new plans, you back out. Reasons you mentioned are irrelevant. You don’t want to change original plan. Period.

Balancing personal comfort with group dynamics can be tricky, especially on a costly and long-awaited trip. Was this a reasonable choice, or should they have compromised? What would you do in their place? Share your thoughts below!