AITA for calling my boyfriend and his sister stupid.
A Redditor shared her experience of calling her boyfriend and his sister “stupid” over car loan decisions. The boyfriend is looking to finance a new car with a 7-year loan term to afford monthly payments.
Concerned about the high interest rates on such long loans, the user tried to discourage him, using his sister’s similar situation as an example.
When her boyfriend became upset, he accused her of calling both him and his sister “stupid,” though she insists it was only the decision she was criticizing, not them as people. Read the full story below.
‘ AITA for calling my boyfriend and his sister stupid.’
I like my boyfriend’s sister, we get along well and I’ve been with my boyfriend for 5 years. My boyfriend is about to be on the market for a new car, his car is 10 years old and starting to have some costly issues. I just paid $3000 to get it out of the shop.
This got us on the topic of getting a new car. His sister mentioned she’s paying $605 a month on a 7 year loan term… (the car outright is 24k) i thought to myself that’s a terrible decision on her part but I didn’t say what I was thinking to her.
This is where my boyfriend says I’m the a**hole. Today while my boyfriend and I were discussing the car situation. I told him if he can’t comfortably afford a 5 year loan term or less he cannot afford the car he wants.
The car he wants is around 45k. He was thinking he was going to take out a 7 yr loan on it so he could afford the payments. I told him flat out that was a REALLY stupid idea.
I tried to explain to him why a 7 year loan term is a really bad idea, especially on a used car. I explained that the interest rates are much higher on long term loans because they’re deemed high risk. I used his sister’s loan as an example.
I told him your sister is going to spend 50k on a 24k car because she took out a 7 yr loan with high interest. I said that’s an insanely stupid decision. It’s not my place to tell her I think she made a dumb decision but I told him between the two of us, it wasn’t very smart.
So I’m not letting him make the same dumb decision. He got mad at me and said “so you’re calling me and my sister stupid” I said I don’t think your sister is a stupid person but I do think she made a stupid financial decision.
I’d think you’re stupid for wanting to do the same thing. He basically called me an a**hole and gave me the silent treatment for a while. So.. AITA for saying him & his sister are stupid??
Here’s how people reacted to the post:
hellofuckingjulie − NTA. Do you finance him completely? It seems very uneven how you spend 3k on him and he’s trying to make bad financial decisions.
Boring-Interest7203 − You paid 3000 for him to get his car out of the shop? And now he wants to buy a car he can’t afford and you’re still his girl friend. Who is the one that’s not thinking things through here?
WhereWereUChilds − It is a stupid purchase. Nta
CookieMonsterFarts − NTA and a 7 year loan on a used car is objectively an incredibly stupid decision… which is not the same as calling *him* stupid. Personally, I would call a man who can’t recognize the difference between a personal insult and his gf advocating for sound financial decisions “my ex”, but that’s just me.
ferretcage − I mean…he asked and you were honest..lol yeah it sounds stupid. Assuming you clarified and didn’t call them stupid, just said that’s a stupid financial decision, I say nta. I wish someone would have called me stupid when I bought my first car. Would have made me think twice! Haha
leothehoe − Def NTA
RecognitionSmall7762 − NTA, people need to be told when they are about to do something incredibly stupid. Get over it. We all have been stupid.
FairyCompetent − NTA. Honestly though it’s good to know that your partner has zero financial literacy, that type of blind spot can really s**ew up your future. I’d be thinking hard about what kind of s**m he might fall for when you’re older and possibly financially entangled.
Slipkind199083 − Never marry this guy he will put you in major debt
Obvious-Weakness-218 − I would rethink this relationship because you are not fiscally aligned.
Do you think the user’s advice was helpful or too harsh? How would you handle this kind of financial discussion with a partner? Share your thoughts below!